So there’s this guy in your life who’s trying to hide the fact from you that he has already a relationship. And you may be wondering, why though.
Believe it or not, men are actually hiding their relationships for many reasons.
Here’s a list of the top 10:
1) He’s keeping his options open
If this guy is trying real hard to hide his relationship from you, there’s a good chance that he is interested in you. And so by hiding, he is keeping his options open in case you feel the same way.
When a man wants to hide his relationship, he’s just not sure of your feelings. Not because he doesn’t want to tell you the truth, but because he’s trying to read your mind and see how you are going to respond.
His current relationship may still be new and so he is still not sure if he wants to fully commit or not. There’s also a good chance that their relationship is already in trouble and the guy is trying to avoid drama by hiding it from you.
I mean, if he really wanted to be with his current woman, then there’s no reason for him to hide it from you.
So to keep his options open, he is not sharing that he is already taken.
2) He’s only just started dating her
If he’s been dating this girl for less than a month, there’s a very good chance that you will not be able to find them on social media since they are only just starting out.
This guy likes to keep their relationships “in hiding” for as long as possible. He knows that the longer they wait, the more time he has to get to know this girl better and build a stronger relationship with her.
One of the reasons why guys do this is because they are still not 100% sure if this girl is right for them and so they are trying to figure it out before telling their friends about it. They have to see to it that it makes any sense for them to continue the relationship with her.
At the same time, if a guy knows that his new relationship is already in trouble even at the beginning, it is highly likely that he will continue to hide it from you. He knows that his current woman may start making things difficult for them
It’s all good though – because as time goes by, you will most likely start to meet this girl in real life.
3) He wants it to be a secret from his parents or friends (for now)
If this guy is trying to hide his relationship from you, there’s a good chance that he’s not telling anybody else about it either.
And the reason why he doesn’t want to tell anyone is because he wants the relationship to develop further before announcing it to everyone. It is common for these guys to wait as long as they can before they fully commit to a new girl.
A possibility also is, that this guy is trying to hide his relationship from his parents. Because if he told them about it, they might try to intervene and end the relationship.
This guy doesn’t want to do anything that would undermine his relationship with their parents. He wants them to be happy and supportive at all times, even if this means only supporting what they are doing in their private lives.
He wants his relationship to be strong, and strong relationships take time.
His intention for hiding it from everyone is pure because he wants this relationship to grow into something more. He wants a long-lasting and solid relationship, but recognizes that it requires him to work on it slowly.
4) He likes you
This might be a bit obvious, but there’s a good chance that this guy likes you a lot. And the main reason why he’s trying to hide his relationship is because he wants to find out where the relationship is going with this girl first.
If a guy has feelings for you and is worried that if you find out about his relationship too soon, let’s just say that it will be really easy for him to lose your attention and interest.
And so until he knows what your feelings are for him, he won’t initiate anything.
If the “relationship” is a secret, there must be a reason for it. And in most cases, this means that the guy is not fully sure about his own feelings.
He wants you but can’t make any moves yet.
You know, he could already be planning on breaking up with the current girlfriend so he can date you. He’s just waiting for the right time to come so that he can see where you are at with him.
And he doesn’t want to make the move too fast, because that would mean that he already has a bad feeling about the relationship so he wants to be able to figure out your feelings first.
Now, if you also have feelings for him, then you should wait for him to make the next move. And so you have to learn how to play hard to get and be a bit less obvious about your feelings.
5) He’s feeling insecure with his girlfriend
If this guy is trying to hide his relationship from you, it’s because he’s feeling insecure with his current girlfriend. If he didn’t feel insecure, he would have no problem telling you that he has a girlfriend.
Insecurity is one of the most common reasons for wanting to hide a relationship with a new girl. And so he wants to find out if this new girl will be someone he can truly be into, or whether she is just a phase.
Most of the time, it’s because he wants to figure out whether she will be as good of a girlfriend.
He doesn’t want to make a decision on the spot that could very well affect their future relationship. He’s still trying to figure it out whether his girlfriend will be sufficient enough for him.
It could also be that his girlfriend isn’t really treating him well or he is having problems with his current relationship. If this is happening, he just doesn’t want to tell anyone about it and is trying to hide his relationship as much as possible.
And so as long as he keeps on comparing his girlfriend to others, or the insecurity is not going away, he will continue to keep her in “hiding” mode.
6) His girlfriend is someone you don’t like
You may be friends with this guy for a long time and if you will know his girlfriend, you won’t like her.
What you don’t know is that he’s trying to hide this worry from you. He doesn’t want anyone else to think that he has bad taste in girlfriends, so he wants to keep you in the dark about this.
He might also be trying to protect his relationship with his girlfriend and do everything in his power not to let it become a problem for him, since it will definitely create some drama.
You see, men never like dramas. They want to stay out of them as much as possible. And so if he’s trying to protect his relationship, he’ll keep it a secret.
They want everything to be as smooth and easy for them as possible. And so this means that if he doesn’t tell you anything, there will be no drama for him before figuring out how to handle the situation.
So, if this is what’s happening, don’t try to confront him on it. Instead, wait for him to come to you and tell you about it. If he really has a problem, he’s going to take action and won’t just sit around in silence.
If this guy is trying to hide his relationship from you, there’s a very good chance that he is still not fully committed to the girl he wants to be with. And besides, he may be afraid of rejection if you find out about them later on in the relationship.
7) He doesn’t want the relationship to become public
If this guy is hiding his relationship from you, it’s more likely because he doesn’t want it to become a problem for him. This is again a problem that not many people are aware of.
Most of us do not understand this. We think that if we tell our friends about our current relationships, there will be no issues with them and we will have an easy time being seen as “single” by everyone.
But it doesn’t work like that. Really, the fact that he doesn’t want his girlfriend to end up in the social feed is going to be a problem for him. And so if he wants to lock this relationship down, he’s definitely doing it for a reason.
And there quite a few reasons why he would want his relationship to remain private. At least, if he is trying to keep you in the dark about it all because it will somehow affect your impression of him or just make life easy for him.
8) He’s trying to figure out if he really wants the relationship to work
Well, some guys are just too afraid of taking any risk at all. They think that if they take on a new friend or girlfriend, this will somehow affect their reputation as well and so they will lose it all.
And so they want to find out what the girlfriend really thinks about them first before going forward in the relationship. And that’s exactly what this guy is doing.
He wants to know what he will get out of it, whether he should take it to the next level and build something serious with her. He doesn’t want to make any decisions immediately, because these things need some time.
If they just started dating, he will want to take things slowly and see if it’s going to work out. The only thing that he can do is to test this relationship out, see what happens and go from there.
It’s also a possibility that he is confused about the type of woman he wants to be with and is trying to find out if this girl can be on the same level.
If he doesn’t want this relationship to take a serious turn, he will keep it a secret from you. He wants to wait and see, so that he can figure everything out before making any big decisions.
9) He’s going to break up with her soon
Why tell anyone about his relationship if he’s going to break up with the girl soon? Well, he’s not going to tell you off the bat if he’s going to break up with her.
So, what will likely happen is that the relationship will continue for a while and you’ll be involved in it, but for some reason or another, it will end. He doesn’t want his relationship to be public knowledge since he doesn’t want anyone gossiping about him.
And it’s not like he wants his girlfriend to be upset after breaking up with her or anything like that. The better plan is to keep everything on the down low until things get sorted out and he can make a clean break from this relationship altogether.
He may still be in the process of figuring things out and he’s just not ready to make a commitment. He doesn’t want anyone else to know about it because he’s not sure if he wants to keep the relationship or not
And of course, if the woman finds out about it, she will be upset and this will lead the breakup in a very bad way. If he comes clean with you now, you’re going to make a big deal out of it and this may lead him to making an even worse decision in terms of breaking up with his girlfriend.
10) He is not really serious about her
The most common reason behind why this guy is hiding his relationship from you is because he’s not really serious about the girl he’s with. He doesn’t really want to keep you in the dark about his girlfriend, but he has no idea how much longer he wants to spend with her.
He’s just trying to figure out what to do and so this means that he will keep it a secret from you until there’s an actual decision made on what should be done next.
What he is having with her now is a fling – a short-term thing. He doesn’t want to end it because he wants to see what happens and make a decision about it all.
Now, if you’re not understanding him, he’s definitely not going to tell you anything about his relationship with the girl.
Casual dating is nothing new to him right now, so he’s trying to figure out if he wants to take things further with his girlfriend. But you see, there’s a good chance that the relationship won’t last very long at all
He may not want her in his life anymore, so he will get rid of her soon enough. It will be a matter of time before you find out about it, but until then, stay on the fence about his relationship.
You should know by now why he keeps his relationship a secret from you.
Now that you know what he is hiding, you can make an informed decision about whether or not to continue spending time with him or even see him as a friend.
And if he isn’t going to be able to tell you the truth soon, it’s really up to you if you’re going to be bothered about it.
For now, let’s just see what he has to say and if he can now tell you about this situation.
But remember, if he is hiding something from you, it’s because he doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable – so he’s just trying to avoid that altogether.
You don’t have to take action right away, but there might be a time in which things will proceed in one way or another. Just sit back, and let’s see what happens next.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.
The above link will give you $50 off your first session - an exclusive offer for Love Connection readers.