Think you lack the charm and swagger to get girls to like you?
Let’s face it, that’s a problem. Wherever there are people, there will be pickup lines and pick-up artists. Who knows what those guys say that gets them the attention they crave — perhaps one day we’ll find out.
But until then, let’s get back to this list of 15 reasons why girls don’t like you (and what to do about it).
1) You’re not a good listener
Here’s the truth:
Girls like it when you listen to them.
That’s all they want — someone to listen to them.
They don’t like it when you interrupt the conversation, or when you only ask questions to keep the conversation going, which is a sign that you’re not interested in their answers.
So take an active interest in what they say. They’ll notice and they’ll appreciate it.
Perhaps the reason why you can’t get girls to like you is that you just don’t listen. Ask them about themselves. They’ll appreciate it and will most likely like you more for it.
2) You’re not funny enough for her taste
Another reason why girls don’t like you is that they don’t find you funny.
Girls love a good sense of humor. They don’t have to be funny themselves, but they’re going to appreciate it when they see you’re having fun.
It’s a great icebreaker.
Sure, they might not be able to do funny voices or jokes but do a few impressions and it’ll certainly entertain them.
Here are a few tips on how to make her laugh:
- Learn to tell a story — Girls love captivating stories. Whether it’s about your life or someone else, as long as it’s interesting, she’ll be more likely to laugh.
- Perfect your timing — Make sure you deliver the punch line at the right time so that it’ll have the biggest impact.
- Be ridiculous — Girls love ridiculous humor, so do something crazy and it’s likely she’ll laugh.
- Be provocative — If you can be a little provocative in an interesting way, she’s going to like you even more for being out there with your humor.
3) You’re not connecting with her on a deeper level
You might think that you’re having a good time when you’re talking to her, but for her, it’s just one more guy who’s talking about what he likes.
So instead of focusing on yourself and your thoughts, ask her about herself. What kind of things does she like? What kind of hobbies does she have? Does she like reading? Singing? Dancing? Acting?
And while you’re at it, make sure that the conversation is meaningful.
The key here is to make a connection. Connecting with her makes what you say more meaningful.
But wait, there’s more!
While this article will shed light on the main reasons girls don’t like you, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.
With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice tailored to your unique situation…
Relationship Hero is a popular site where highly trained relationship coaches help people work through complex relationship issues, like reasons girls don’t like you. Their popularity boils down to how skilled their coaches are.
Why am I so confident that they can help you?
Well, after recently experiencing a tough patch in my own relationship, I reached out to them for help. From the moment I got in touch, I was given genuine, helpful advice, and was finally able to see my relationship issues with real clarity.
I was blown away by how kind and empathetic my coach was.
Within minutes, you could be receiving life-changing advice on how to navigate and repair the issues you’re facing in your relationship.
4) You don’t have a sense of humor
As we’ve discussed above, one of the reasons why girls don’t like you is that they find you humorless.
So if you want to make her laugh, be funny with a sense of humor. That will go a long way in making her like you as they’ll see that you’re a funny human being who can think on your feet and make them laugh.
Want to know the best part?
When you’re funny, your girls will appreciate how you’re able to make them feel good.
She’d probably love to be with an intelligent guy who is able to crack her up with his wit and humor.
So the next time you want to break the ice and start a conversation, make sure that it’s some kind of joke or quip. Don’t just go out there and blurt out that you like the color of her eyes or that you like the way she talks; be funny!
It’ll work wonders!
5) She feels like you’re always trying to get something from her
Sometimes, when you’re talking to a girl, she’ll feel like you’re only talking to her because you want something from her.
Let’s face it, girls know when a guy is only trying to get something from them, so if you’ve been setting up meetings for sex or for other reasons and not because you genuinely want to connect with her, she’ll know.
Even if you’re not going around trying to hook up with her or asking her out every time you see her, she’ll still feel like you just want something from her.
So instead of focusing on getting something from her, focus on connecting with her. What do I mean? Well, go out there and do things together. Show interest in the things that she does outside your relationship — that way, she’ll feel like you genuinely care about her and what’s going on in her life.
6) You’re not being confident enough
If you’ve been going around asking a woman out and not getting anything in return, it’s likely that you’re not confident enough for her taste.
Girls love a confident guy. And the reason why she’s not interested in you is probably that you don’t come across as being confident enough.
Women love men who know exactly what they want and aren’t afraid to ask for it.
Ask yourself these questions:
- Do you know what you want?
- Do you know why you’re doing what you’re doing?
- Do you have the confidence to ask for it?
- Is your answer consistent with your actions?
If the answer to all these questions is no, it’s time for a makeover. It’s time to tune up your game. Make sure that your answers are positive and genuine so that she’ll be attracted to you.
7) She feels like she has to maintain a certain image with you
It’s possible that when you’re around her, she feels like she has to act a certain way.
Instead of being her true self, she’ll feel like she has to conceal certain thoughts, feelings, and emotions because you don’t agree with the way she acts.
A lot of guys can be very demanding towards women. They expect women to act a certain way and are disappointed when they don’t meet their expectations.
For example, if you’re with a girl who is a little loud and boisterous, but you prefer women who are more reserved and quiet, you’re probably going to be disappointed.
It’s the same way with your job. Most girls don’t like men who are in lower-paying jobs because they feel like they have to maintain a certain image with them.
So instead of putting her in that situation where she has to maintain some sort of image around you, be yourself, be genuine, and just enjoy being around her.
8) You act afraid of commitment
Think about this for a moment:
Hasn’t she told you that she’s not ready for a relationship at the moment?
If she feels like you’re acting afraid of commitment, she’s not going to want to be with you. She’ll feel like you’re just using her.
A lot of guys make this mistake. They don’t understand that the girl they’re with is looking for a long-term relationship, and they think that they can “hook up” with them instead of dating or being in a relationship with them.
This is where most guys fail with girls. They want to be in relationships, but they don’t want to commit.
But if you get her away from all the guys who only want to hook up, she’ll feel like you’re committed and committed to the relationship. And she’ll be willing to commit to the relationship with you!
9) You have a negative attitude that is making things worse
Be careful with the negative attitude you have.
There are some guys who just can’t seem to look at the glass half empty. They’re always focused on what’s bad about something, and they focus on what’s wrong rather than what’s right. And that mentality is keeping women away from them.
It’s also keeping them from getting the results they want and from making progress with their performance and career.
To get the girl you want, you need to be positive. You need to give her attention, she needs to feel drawn towards you, and make her feel good by saying nice things that make her feel good about herself.
It gets better if you can come across as being a happy person who’s always smiling and laughing. Some of the happiest men are the most attractive ones, and ladies give them a lot of attention.
10) You disrespect her boundaries
Every woman has boundaries, and if you cross that line, she becomes uncomfortable with the situation.
There are things you can do to respect her boundaries.
For example, if you’re out at a bar and you see a girl who looks really attractive, don’t go up and try to hit on her right away. Let her get comfortable with you first before approaching her.
It’s not going to be hard to read body language — women will usually tell you when they’re comfortable and when they aren’t. So just let her come to that point of comfort with you first.
It’s also important to pay attention to her words and her tone. If she’s saying no and doesn’t want it, listen to what she says and respect that boundary.
If you don’t respect her boundaries, you’re going to push her away and never be able to get close to her. She’ll see you as being an alpha male, who is overly aggressive and over-the-top with his emotions.
11) Her friends don’t like you
This one is a big one, but it’s also something that needs to be fixed right away.
If you don’t have a connection with a girl’s friends, she’s probably not going to be interested in you. It doesn’t matter what kind of guy you are — if her friends don’t like you, then she won’t want to be with you.
This is because women look up to their friends and take them as an example of how they’re supposed to act.
Even if she doesn’t know what her friends think, they’ll still affect her thoughts and feelings. If the group of friends she hangs out with is seeing you as someone who’s in their circle, that’s usually a good sign.
But if they’re seeing you as someone who’s way off to the side, that means that you’re developing a bad image.
12) You don’t communicate well
Communication is key in any kind of relationship.
If you don’t communicate well with her, then you’re going to lose her. There’s a lot at play here — if you have healthy communication, she’ll feel more confident around you and she’ll be more open to the idea of dating you and being in a relationship with you.
A lot of guys have issues communicating with girls because they’re afraid of looking vulnerable or weak in front of them.
Here’s the key:
Communication is vulnerable. It means that you’re putting yourself out there, and you’re showing some skin. But that’s definitely something you need to do if you want to get better with women and win over the girl of your dreams.
13) Your body language either communicates indifference or doesn’t say anything at all
A lot of guys don’t know how to use body language in their favor.
They either communicate indifference, or they have no confidence, which leads to no body language at all. Other girls don’t feel drawn to a guy who doesn’t give them any signals — they get turned off and lose interest.
But if you’re good with body language, and you can use it to your advantage, then you’ll be able to draw the girl in and make her feel more comfortable around you.
So how to use body language to your advantage?
- Eye contact: You can use eye contact to make her feel more comfortable. Look her in the eyes, and maintain that connection. This is a sign of confidence, and it tells her that you’re interested in what she has to say.
- Smile: This one is obvious. A smile shows confidence, and it’s a huge turn-on.
- Posture: It’s also important to have good posture. This can communicate confidence and energy, which are two things that women find to be very attractive in men.
14) You haven’t been emotionally available to her
The way you feel about a girl is going to affect not only the way that she feels about you, but it’s also going to have a huge influence on her behavior and her actions.
If you’re emotionally unavailable, then there will be no emotional connection between the two of you. She’ll feel lost, ignored, and alone — and that’s not something that she wants to be in a relationship with.
Well, what does emotionally available mean?
It means that you’re being there for her when she needs you and that you’re listening to her when she needs you to listen. It also means that if she has any problems or wants to talk about something in particular, then you’re paying attention to what she’s saying and reacting appropriately.
15) You don’t listen to her or make an effort to really get to know her interests and tastes
The last reason why she doesn’t like you is that she’s not confident in your ability to understand her, or to be with her.
If you’re not into what she’s talking about and you’re not taking the time to get to know who she is and what things interest her, then she’s going to see that as a lack of interest. She’ll feel like you’re not being there for her and that you don’t care enough about the relationship.
The same thing goes for her. If she’s not a good listener or if she doesn’t try to get to know you, then you’re going to lose interest.
Now: how do you fix this?
It’s all about making each other feel like there’s a solid bond between you two. You need to be able to develop that connection and get comfortable with each other so that she can feel like there really is something special at play here.
But it doesn’t just stop there. You need to be able to ask her questions, and you need to develop a sense of humor around the subject.
Because if you don’t use humor well, then you’re going to lose her interest fairly quickly. But if you find the right way of using humor, then it’ll help build a connection and make each other feel more comfortable around each other.
What to do about it?
Now that you’ve read the 15 most common reasons why a girl doesn’t like you, what are you supposed to do?
If there’s something here that’s a deal-breaker for you, then what can you do about it? There are definitely some things that you can change and improve upon . . . but it’s important to know what they are.
Here are 4 tips to help you take action and start correcting your mistakes:
1) Be a great conversationalist
Let’s face it: Initial conversations with women can be tough. However, you can turn a potentially awkward moment into a moment of connection simply by finding common ground with them.
I learned this technique from Kate Spring. She’s a best-selling author and is considered to be one of the best dating coaches in the world.
Kate’s created a free online video where she gives you several techniques like this guaranteed to help you better attract women.
Watch the video here. It’s 100% free and there are no strings attached.
2) Show your appreciation
When you show your appreciation, she feels valued by you. She doesn’t feel like she’s crazy or being taken advantage of. She feels cared for and loved.
Think about it:
If you know for sure that she is happy and appreciative, then this allows you to make a move without any reservations.
Try it out: next time you meet up with her, pay her a simple compliment. Then, pay her a bigger compliment. Every time you do it, she’ll start to feel more and more comfortable around you.
3) Find things you both like in common
This is a very important step. You want to find things that you both like and can relate to. Remember, she is not the only person in the world, right?
What interests/seems interesting to you might interest her. You don’t want to talk about something that’s just going to bore her. And she doesn’t want to talk about things that you don’t find interesting or appealing in any way either!
4) Get her to talk about herself
Just like you, she has certain interests and hobbies that are important to her. You want to hear about them and pull her out of her shell.
She doesn’t want to do the same thing with you? Maybe she’s just not ready yet. Allow her some time to open up by getting her talking – not by trying too hard to impress her with all your life stories.
She’ll start opening up on a deeper level soon enough.
The truth is, most women just want to be with someone who’s confident and comfortable around them. If you make her feel like she can rely on you, then she’ll open up to you in all sorts of ways.
And when she opens up, all kinds of beautiful things will start happening between you two.
We’ve covered a lot of ground here today.
We’ve taken a look at the 15 most common reasons why a girl doesn’t like you, and we’ve talked about how to fix those things that can be “improved.”
If you want to make sure that she’s in love with you, then you need to take action now. You need to take action on your own behavior and start making the changes that are necessary.
It’s important to remember that love is not only about how you feel about someone. It’s also about how someone feels about you.
So the next time you find yourself getting frustrated about why a girl doesn’t like you, take these steps and see how much better your life becomes.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.