Why am I so clingy? 19 reasons (and what to do about it)

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Do you find yourself wanting to spend every waking moment with your significant other?

Do you feel inconsolable when they’re not around?

If the answer is yes, then you may be suffering from a condition known as “clinginess“.

Clinginess is characterized by one’s desire to spend as much time possible with their partner.

There are several common causes of clinginess, and this article will explore some of the reasons behind it.

It will also address some tips on how to reduce clinginess and lead a more satisfying life outside of one’s relationship.

1) You Love Your Partner.

Love is a natural emotion that many of us experience. It’s a feeling of strong affection and attachment to someone or something.

So if you feel love for someone, this may explain your clinginess. The more you love your partner, naturally the more you will want to spend time with them, right?

It’s completely understandable because love is an amazing emotion. However, when this love turns into clinginess it can be detrimental to the couple’s well-being.

Clinginess can lead to jealousy and possessiveness which in turn can harm your relationship.

Therefore, while you shouldn’t stop loving your partner, make sure it doesn’t turn into clinginess.

How to fix this?  Do things that can take your mind off your partner.

When your partner is not around, be sure that you are enjoying yourself and doing things that bring you fulfillment. This will be good for your self-esteem and bring out your best qualities.

If that doesn’t work, try to find hobbies and activities with other people to help take your mind off of the person you are missing.

You want to enjoy yourself as much as possible so that when they do come around, you won’t find yourself spending every waking moment with them out of clinginess.

2) You’re Afraid Your Partner Will Leave You.

You may feel clingy if you worry that your partner will suddenly leave or cheat on you.

You may also feel clingy when you are uncertain of whether they love you or not, and are therefore afraid that they will leave if things don’t work out.

These are understandable reasons, however, you shouldn’t let them control your decisions.

If you constantly feel clingy because of these concerns, then you should address them with your partner.

Talk to them and tell them how you feel.

It will be okay to be concerned when it comes to the future, but it’s never healthy to worry about what might happen in the past.

Now, listen. There might be a way to ensure that your partner will not leave you.

There’s a new theory in the relationship world that’s causing quite a stir – it’s called the hero instinct.

Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept finally explains how men think and feel in relationships.

And it’s something most women have never even heard of.

According to James Bauer, men don’t need a lot to feel content in their relationships. What they need has nothing to do with sex.

Men have certain innate drivers. And when a woman comes along and triggers them, it causes a powerful response. The result is a man who loves harder, commits wholeheartedly, and truly dedicates himself to the relationship.

So, how can you trigger your man’s hero instinct?

The easiest thing to do is to watch this simple and genuine video by James Bauer.

The truth is, once you understand how the hero instinct works, there’s no telling what heights your relationship can reach.

So if you want to give your man what he truly wants from you, make sure to check out James Bauer’s excellent video. In it, he reveals the exact texts and phrases you can use straight away.

Here’s a link to the free video again.

3) You’re Obsessed With The Relationship.

You may feel clingy because you are so obsessed with your relationship that it is all you can think about.

You may think that you would spend the rest of your life with this person, or at least a very long time.

This is understandable because people do often place such high importance on their relationship that it dominates all other things in their lives.

However, if this is the case, then it is time to step back and start taking a look at your priorities.

Many other things in life are more important than your partner.

Perhaps resolve that you will only spend time with your partner when they are willing to spend time with you.

Set boundaries for yourself regarding how often you contact them and make sure to respect those boundaries.

4) You’re Afraid They’ll Meet Someone Better Than You If You Don’t Spend Every Moment With Them.

You may be clingy because you are afraid that your partner is going to fall in love with someone else.

You fear that they will get along better with their new significant other, and won’t want to spend time with you anymore.

If that is the case, then it is important to realize that you should not be afraid to let go.

You should be willing to let go if your relationship is not working, and start looking for someone new.

It’s necessary to find a new relationship that works better for you.

5) You’re Depressed.

Depression is a state of low mood and aversion to activity that lasts for a long period.

Although not everyone who suffers from depression exhibits clingy behavior, those who do usually have difficulty separating themselves from those they are depressed over.

The first thing to do is, try to take life one day at a time.

Try to stay as much in the present as possible, and avoid dwelling on the past or worrying about the future.

Focus on what you can do today and tomorrow, and set short-term goals for yourself that will help you get through your depression.

6) You Have a Fear of Letting Go.

You may feel clingy because you cannot let go of something that is no longer beneficial to you.

Your partner may be a sign of your emotional insecurities and flaws, so if they were to leave, it would be a reminder that the old you are not the perfect person you think you are.

It’s relatively easier to get over someone than to get over your insecurities once they are gone.

So if this is your issue, make efforts to work on yourself before attempting to mend your relationship.

This will achieve the best possible results in the long run.

7) Your Partner Makes You Feel Clingy.

You may feel clingy because your partner is putting you in that position.

They may be the one who doesn’t want the relationship to work and just keeps coming back to you for more.

Perhaps if this is the case, then try to be a bit more guarded with your partner.

You need to recognize when certain behaviors are only bad for you and learn how to turn them off as quickly as possible so as not to spend any more time with this person than is necessary.

If they continue to do things that make you uncomfortable, then perhaps it is time for them to leave or at least get some help from someone who understands what they are going through.

8) You’re An Emotional Time Bomb.

If you feel clingy for this reason, then it is because you are highly emotional and often cry at the drop of a hat.

While it is normal to feel sad over certain things in life, if you feel like you can’t let anything go and hold onto every little thing that comes your way, then you may be going overboard with this.

You may want to ask yourself why it’s SO hard for you to let go of things that aren’t so important in the long run.

It just makes sense to allow yourself some time to heal from a loss and move on from what hurts most without being too dramatic about the whole thing!

9) You Lack Trust In Your Partner.

This is likely a sign of insecurity and fear that your partner is going to make you upset when they are not around.

Perhaps they will take advantage of you while they are gone, leading to arguments and hurt feelings.

If this is the case, then face your fears and try to get over them. It will do you more good than making bad conclusions!

If you’re concerned that something is bothering you, then it’s always best to talk about it with your partner first.

Make sure that both of you understand the problem, so that you can work towards a solution together.

10) You Feel Like You’re Not Being Heard.

If you feel as though your partner is not listening to you and what problems you face, then perhaps this is the problem.

Your clingy behavior is simply a cry for attention. It may be that they are having a hard time understanding you.

So if this is the case, try to speak in a more calm, clear manner.

Explain things more clearly and put more focus on what it is that you want them to understand.

If the problem persists, then perhaps they are not being fully honest with you regarding their reasons for being away from home or with someone else.

This can lead to problems in the long run!

11) You Don’t Want To Hurt Them.

This is often the reason that people have for being clingy. They know that if they choose to leave, it will hurt them badly, and so they avoid doing so because of this.

But instead of showing their feelings whenever something goes wrong, they bottle them up and allow them to fester deep within their heart until all hope is lost.

Maybe this person should learn to let go a little more!

Sometimes all you need to do is to try being more upfront with your partner and express how you truly feel on any given day or at any given moment.

Perhaps if they knew how you felt deep down inside, then maybe they would be more understanding as well.

12) You’re Insecure.

Many people who are insecure in a relationship tend to cling harder to their partner because they are worried that their partner may leave them.

The main reason for this is that you have little or no faith in yourself.

You lack the confidence to be able to handle yourself by yourself, so this is what drives your clingy behavior into overdrive!

If you want your relationship and in general, your life to work out, then you need to learn how to gain some self-confidence.

Practice self-love every day and learn how to take care of yourself in the meantime.

Also, make sure that your partner feels your love and care because he needs it as much as you do.

This will provide you and your partner with security.

I mentioned this fascinating concept earlier: the hero instinct.

When a man’s inner hero is triggered, he’s more likely to commit to you despite your clinginess.

Just by knowing the right things to say to him, you’ll open a part of him that no woman has ever reached before.

And the best way to do so is by watching this free video by James Bauer. In it, he’ll reveal simple phrases and texts you can use to make your man truly yours.

Here’s a link to the excellent video again.

13) You Want To Hold On Forever.

This is a sign of someone who is not willing to let go of something even if it isn’t beneficial for them.

It could be that they feel that the relationship will never end and they want to hold onto it forever, even if this causes an unhappy situation for themselves and anyone else involved.

If this is the case, then it may be best for them to learn how to let go… at least a little bit!

If you feel clingy because you are holding onto something no longer beneficial, then you may want to try moving on from it and leave certain feelings behind.

14) You Don’t Know How To Handle Your Emotions.

If you find yourself feeling clingy in a relationship, then perhaps it’s because you have trouble managing your emotions and dealing with their effects.

You might not be able to handle your feelings on your own or find a way to deal with them properly.

This can cause anger, depression, and many other problems that cause people to behave the way that they do!

If you feel like this, then it’s time to talk to someone about it. Either your partner or a professional therapist would probably be able to help you get through this.

While this article will shed light on the main reasons why you are being clingy, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.

With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice tailored to your unique situation…

Relationship Hero is a popular site where highly trained relationship coaches help people work through complex relationship issues, like uncontrollable clinginess. Their popularity boils down to how skilled their coaches are.

Why am I so confident that they can help you?

Well, I recently experienced a tough patch in my relationship, and I reached out to them for help. From the moment I got in touch, I was given genuine, helpful advice, and was finally able to see my relationship issues with real clarity.

I was blown away by how kind and empathetic my coach was.

Within minutes, you could be receiving life-changing advice on how to navigate and repair the issues you’re facing concerning your clingy personality.

Click here to get started.

15) You Feel Guilty That You’re Not Doing More For Your Partner.

Perhaps the reason why you feel clingy is that you feel like you should be doing more for your partner.

I’ve talked to many people who tell me that they feel guilty knowing they are not being the perfect “partner” and keeping their significant other happy all of the time.

And I think a lot of this comes down to insecurity.

If you feel like this, then it’s time to speak with your partner and see what they have to say about it.

Perhaps they’ll be able to help you through this and deal with the problem healthily.

Or perhaps, if you know that the two of you need to sit down and discuss this issue, then don’t be afraid to do so!

It’s a big step towards finding a solution for both of you.

16) You’re Afraid.

This is something that most people will relate to on some level, as we all want to feel secure in our surroundings when it comes to our relationships.

And if you’re afraid of losing your significant other, then you’ll likely feel more clingy than others.

Being fearful of losing your partner is a good sign that they mean a lot to you and that they’re safe to be around.

If this is the case, then it’s time to take some time and think about what’s going on in your relationship.

Once you’ve done this, then the two of you can sit down and discuss how each of you deals with fear.

17) You Hope That Your Partner Will Change For You.

This is another reason that you may feel clingy in your relationship.

If you want so badly for your partner to change something about themselves, then you might find yourself clinging to them to make this happen.

And while you might see this as a way to make your relationship better, it’s likely the reason why the two of you feel like things are not falling into place.

Trying to change one another is a surefire way for things to go south between the two of you!

Doing so only creates some distance between both people and can cause conflict within your relationship.

18) You Are A “People Pleaser.”

You feel like you need to prove that you are a good person by doing things for others no matter what the cost is to yourself.

This is another way that people feel insecure within themselves and tend to cling to those around them to make them feel better about themselves.

Being nice and helping out other people can make you feel better about your actions, but, this could lead to problems in a relationship.

If you’re trying too hard to keep your partner happy at all times and do as much as possible for them, then this can become an issue.

19) You Want Someone To Put You First.

In a relationship, it can come across that you are being clingy because you want your partner to put you first.

Maybe this means that they will have to do something for you more often or take more time out of their day for you.

If this is your problem, then it’s time to figure out how each of you would feel about this.

This is something that a lot of people want when they’re in relationships, as we all want someone who will put our needs before their own.

However, this is something that most people can’t do, so if you feel like this is being taken advantage of in your relationship then it may be best to speak with your partner about it.


Overall, you have to remember that the above signs are ones that most of us will feel in relationships. That’s just how things are!

We fear that our partners will lose interest when they see that we are not perfect. But love is more than that. If they love us, they will accept us.

Also, there are things that you can do to keep him in love with you.

I touched on the hero instinct earlier – it’s the perfect remedy for the situation you’re facing.


Because once a man’s hero instinct is triggered, he’ll only have eyes for you. You’ll reach a part of him that no woman has ever managed to reach before.

And in return, he’ll be compelled to commit to you and love you like he’s never loved another woman.

So if you’re ready to take that plunge and reach new heights in your relationship, make sure to check out relationship expert James Bauer’s invaluable advice.

Click here to watch the excellent free video.

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.

The above link will give you $50 off your first session - an exclusive offer for Love Connection readers.

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