What to do when she likes you but doesn’t want a relationship (practical guide)

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I know what you’re going through. 

You know she likes you, and that’s obvious, yet for some reason, she doesn’t want a relationship. You’re confused. You have a lot of questions, you can’t take it anymore and you need answers. 

In this article, I will share with you 10 tips on what to do when a girl likes you but doesn’t want to be in a relationship.

1) Don’t pressure her

I bet you did. You’ve been pressuring her, pushing her, forcing information out of her, etc. But she didn’t budge. And you’re getting frustrated!

Stop pressuring her, it doesn’t work. 

Let go and relax. She’ll share it with you when she’s ready.

If she likes you and is interested in a relationship with you and you’re pushy, she’ll hide from you and move on to someone else who will respect her wishes and not pressure her into giving him what he wants so fast.

So my advice is to relax and wait for her to give you the signals.

2) Be a supportive friend

Trust me, every relationship needs friendship. Especially those who are in the beginning stages. If you want to be with her, then be her friend now.

This is what you should do:

  • Treat her like an equal
  • Respect her decisions, interests, and wishes
  • Listen to her without judging her or pressuring her
  • Acknowledge her feelings

That’s how you should behave toward a girl you like but doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you. Treat her exactly like you would treat your best friend. 

And I’m sure she’ll appreciate it and reciprocate the feelings. If you have small fights with each other or if sometimes she feels offended by something you say, use this opportunity to apologize and talk it through without drama.

3) Be upfront about your intentions

Here’s the truth:

Like many men, you probably didn’t know exactly what to tell her about your intentions. There’s a reason for that. Because there’s no 1 set rule that works for every single guy in every situation. 

So don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!

You have to figure out what will work best for you, but let me give you some general advice:

Don’t give hints, signals, or show signs that you like her. It might work for others, but it never works for me. In fact, I always had the opposite reaction. I was scared away.

Be upfront about your intentions and tell her that you like her and that you want to spend more time with her, but don’t ask questions about what she wants from this relationship or if she wants to be in a relationship with you.

As I’ve mentioned above, the key here is to be her friend first and take things slow. There’s no need to confuse her and make her questions.

4) Let your confidence do the hard work 

Women love men with confidence. But what does that actually mean?

Having confidence means you are secure with yourself and your emotions. Be proud of who you are, it’s worth it!

By being proud of who you are and being confident, your attitude will attract her. She’ll notice that there’s something about you that makes her curious and want to get to know you better.

The best way to show your confidence is by being a great conversationalist.

But let’s face it: Initial conversations with women can be tough. However, you can turn a potentially awkward moment into a moment of connection simply by finding common ground with them.

I learned this technique from Kate Spring. She’s a best-selling author and is considered to be one of the best dating coaches in the world.

Kate’s created a free online video where she gives you several techniques like this guaranteed to help you better attract women.

Watch the video here. It’s 100% free and there are no strings attached.

5) Be willing to compromise on certain things

The fact that she likes you but doesn’t want a relationship with you doesn’t mean you’ll never get her. You just have to be willing to make sacrifices and compromises.

Now, the question is: 

Which things should you be willing to give up for her? And which ones shouldn’t you?

Well, that’s up to you and your decision. But, in my opinion, there are three important things you shouldn’t give up for her:

  • Your personality: It’s the key difference between a nice guy and a real man. You need to keep your personality and your sense of humor intact. Why? Because she loves it!
  • Your personal values: Don’t sell yourself short for someone else’s benefit. When she doesn’t want a relationship, it’s only temporary. Keep this in mind when you compromise your personality, interests, and values with her.
  • Your goals: Your goals are important to you, so keep them. They won’t be there for her if you’re no longer interested in them.

And here are 3 things you should be willing to give up for her:

  • Your time: You don’t want to push her away by ignoring her. Be there for her when she needs you.
  • Your comfort zone: Don’t be afraid to take a risk and be vulnerable. After all, this is the only way to build trust in a relationship.
  • Your hobbies: Some girls like to see you pursue other interests, so be open to trying something that she likes. It might help strengthen the bond you share.

By adding those things up, you can keep most of your values and personality while still showing her a little more openness.

6) Find out the reason she doesn’t want a relationship

Trust me, if you don’t know why she doesn’t want a relationship, you’re missing out on her so much.

There might be something about her that you don’t know. Either that or there’s a chance she isn’t over someone else and she’s still dealing with the pain of a breakup in the past. Or that she’s not 100% sure if she wants to get involved in another relationship right now.

So only trying to “convince” her with your charm and your easy-going nature will never work. In fact, I’m sure it makes things worse for you.

That’s why you need to get to know her deeper than anyone else. Be fully aware of her personal life, don’t hide anything from her, and be supportive of her no matter what.

By doing that, she’ll trust you more and more each day.

Pro tip:

Try to find the reason by asking her friends or family members. They’ll tell you everything you’ve been missing out on and will guide you in the right direction.

7) Give her space

A relationship is a two-way street. You both have to give some space and be willing to compromise. If you’re pushing her away the whole time, it’ll only push her further.

This doesn’t mean you ignore her or let her go. It just means that you give her space when she needs it.

Try to give her a wide berth at times when she most likely needs it, like after a stressful day at work or during those times when she’s caught up in the middle of an argument with a friend.

This will help remove some of the pressure between you two and make her feel comfortable talking to you about what’s going on in her world. Just be sure not to rush things. Give each other some time to process and think about things.

8) Spend quality time with her and be romantic (without expecting anything) 

I’m sure you know that there are many other ways to show her you care besides putting it out there.

The big mistake a lot of men make is trying to be “romantic” and thoughtful from the get-go. It screams “I have no life, I need attention, and I’m desperate for a relationship”.

You must also understand that by doing that, you lose her trust.

So the solution is to take your time and be romantic and thoughtful in a more understated way. It doesn’t mean that you don’t express your feelings, it just means you do it in a way that makes her feel special without making her feel smothered.

Show her you care by going out of your way for her. Do something special like bring her flowers or a little gift. Help her with her work in a simple way, like maybe by doing some of the simpler tasks for her like writing or filing.

Think of ways to show your care without making it rushed or overdone. And don’t be afraid to show that you’d like to make time for her to get out and do things with you if she’s really interested too.

9) Show her that you’re not afraid to take risks 

Another way to deal with the fact that she doesn’t want a relationship but likes you is to show her that you’re not afraid to take risks in a relationship.

And the best way to do that is by letting her know that you’re willing to put your heart on the line.

If she sees evidence of this and knows how you feel, it’ll increase her interest and make her want to be with you even more. That’s why the next time she wants something casual, she’ll reconsider.

For example, you can let her know that you would be willing to leave things open with no pressure at all, you’re willing to share your feelings with her, and you’re very capable of accepting the consequences.

From there on out, she’ll feel much safer around you and might actually begin to trust you more. And if she knows that she can trust you in life and love, it’ll create a much more solid foundation for your relationship as a couple.

10) Find out what she really wants from you and make it happen for her 

The most important thing you need to be sure about is that you are able to give her what she wants from you.

You can’t make her happy if you aren’t capable of doing that yourself. If you don’t, she won’t be interested in giving it a try.

This is why it’s always good to read women and know what they want. You can ask them, but remember it’s always best to know this stuff on your own too just in case they’re lying or hiding things from you.

So here’s the tip to find out what she really wants from you:

Try to look at her in a different light. How does she act toward you when she’s not trying to impress you? Her true colors will always come out then.

Look for small signs and signals that show how much she really enjoys your company or looks forward to seeing you. Once you notice these things, pay attention to them instead of trying so hard to win her over by “forcing” her into liking you.

Final thoughts

It’s very important to remember that no matter how much she likes you if you’re persistent with your “charm” and push her too hard, it’ll end up being a turn-off.

Hopefully, with these 10 tips and with a few days or weeks of trial and error, you’ll be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

But if you want to take things to the next level with this girl, you don’t need to play games or act like someone you aren’t. 

In fact, there are a few simple techniques you can use that’ll change the way you approach women for good. 

You can check them out in this free video by Kate Spring

I mentioned her earlier – she’s a relationship expert who shares the most basic but effective, biology-driven techniques for getting through to women on a deep level. 

Since learning about her, my dating game is stronger than ever. And the best part?

I actually understand how women work in love and relationships now. No more second-guessing, no more ending up in the friend zone. 

Here’s a link to her free video again. 

There are no strings attached, just pure, valuable advice on upping your game around women. 

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.