It can be hard to accept when you feel like your ex has moved on from your relationship and found someone new.
It feels like rejection, and it can be very painful.
But in order to get over that pain and find happiness again, you have to be realistic about the situation.
And there are some things that can help you feel better until you’re really okay again.
Here are 10 important tips to help you out!
1) Figure out what went wrong in the relationship
When you break up with a person, it’s very easy to blame them for everything.
And while they might have played a part in the breakup, there are also other things that made you realize that things weren’t right between the two of you.
If the issues only started after you broke the relationship off and didn’t before, then it’s very likely that the person is not at fault.
However, contemplating about the relationship will surely help you figure out what you could be doing wrong and try to correct it, so you can move on to a better relationship in the future.
Keep in mind that despite our efforts, some relationships simply don’t work out.
Sometimes it is simply not possible to work things out, and the issues are too big to overcome.
Whatever goes on, you have to try to accept the situation and deal with it in the best way possible.
2) Don’t blame yourself
If you still have some issues with the relationship and what went wrong, then it’s hard to believe that it could really be over.
And if you don’t take any responsibility for what happened, it’s almost impossible to move on.
It’s necessary to show the desire for the relationship to work out, but it’s also very important for you to pursue your own happiness first.
If you don’t, you’ll be in a desperate rush to find someone else who will make you happy, and that won’t solve anything.
You need to take care of yourself first, and if your ex couldn’t do that, then he isn’t worth your time at all.
Don’t let your feelings for your ex lower your self-esteem because even if you feel like you’ve been rejected, that doesn’t mean that you are not a good person.
Breakups happen all the time in relationships, and it’s very common for people to get over their exes and move on with their life after a while.
Maybe you didn’t expect it to happen so soon, but it may turn out for the better.
This will save your time and spare you the suffering of waiting for him to reconsider and hope that it will get better.
The fact that he replaced you with someone new means that he was not sure about his feelings for you and that he is probably just looking for ways to live a happier life.
3) Make sure that you deal with your feelings
Suppressing emotions can lead to a lot of problems, especially if your emotions are negative.
The longer you hold them inside, the harder it will be to get over them.
And even if it’s hard to accept your feelings right now, simply give it time.
Don’t suppress your emotions, and don’t hold back on expressing how you feel right now.
But maybe you need to take a different approach to fix your relationship.
Maybe you need to work on the most important one you’ll ever have before you can fix the others:
The one you have with yourself.
I learnt about this from the shaman Rudá Iandê. In his excellent, free video on cultivating healthy relationships, Rudá reveals where most of us go wrong in our relationships.
So why should you listen to Rudá’s life-changing advice?
Well, he uses techniques derived from ancient shamanic teachings, but he puts his own modern-day twist on them.
He may be a shaman, but he’s made the same mistakes in love that you and I have.
And now he’s found the solution, he wants to share it with you.
So if you’re done with feeling less than worthy, if you’re tired of toxic relationships, and you want to cultivate real, genuine love, check out his simple yet effective advice.
4) Look at the bright side of things
Even though they might be hard to see, there are also benefits to breakups.
It’s important that you don’t make the breakup your prime concern by pushing yourself into despair.
And even though there will be some downtimes, it’s important that you take advantage of the good and positive times while they’re still around.
Can I be totally honest with you – I have realized that whenever some relationship in my life fell apart, someone better came along.
Even though this can be hard to imagine, I can tell you that there is a sense of relief; actually, it’s a kind of freedom.
The ending of any relationship brings about a better new beginning, and when it’s the end of some relationship that took so much energy to move towards, what comes next makes the past easier to let go.
Open your heart and your mind to some new people and things that will enrich your life and help you turn your life around.
Don’t be afraid to take a chance and a risk.
The end of this relationship can be the beginning of a better one with yourself and consequently with other people.
5) Choose realistic goals
You might be sad, but instead of being gentle during this time, you choose to be hard on yourself.
This is why you should make sure that you’re not setting unrealistic expectations for yourself.
Don’t be hard on yourself because as much time as it took for a relationship to end, it could take the same amount of time for you to get over it.
Even though it seems now that your ex moved on, that doesn’t mean that he will not have to deal with his emotions too.
Try to heal and be open to the possibility of another relationship, no matter how painful it might be right now.
You should at least try and get out there and meet some new people because there’s always a chance that you might find someone who is interested in you.
But don’t rush into anything either because that can lead to more problems than they’re worth.
6) Find things to enjoy
If you’re feeling down after a breakup, then it’s important to find other things that make you happy.
And while they may not be the same as what you once enjoyed with your ex, it’s important that you find some new ones.
Go to a new city and explore its beauties, or go for a walk on the beach as a new form of exercise.
Take up a hobby that you used to enjoy, such as watching movies or painting.
Focus on yourself because it is the only way to recharge after a difficult period in your life.
It can be hard to take care of yourself if you’re feeling down because of your breakup.
But it’s important that you try and look at things from different angles than just one.
Indulge yourself in all the things that you wanted to have and you couldn’t because of your relationship.
Give yourself the time to quiet down and heal.
And you will find that you’ve been looking forward to this all along.
Try to look at the good in your breakup, and try not to regret it after a while, because sooner or later, you’ll realize that there are other things in life worth living for.
If you have been in a relationship for a long time, then this could be the break that you need in order to change the way your life looks.
7) Give yourself time to grieve
It is not easy to come to an end of the relationship you used to believe will last for a lifetime, but at the end of the day, we are all left alone to face our inner demons.
So, it is normal to feel sad and have negative thoughts and feelings.
Facing these feelings will help you overcome them and understand better what exactly hurt you so much.
If you find the strength to face the truth, you will be able to conquer your negative feelings and move on.
Lately, people simply don’t let themselves feel sadness and run from it like it is something unnatural.
However, there is nothing unnatural about it.
If you run from it and you suppress it, you can bet that it will come back in the ugliest form when you least expect it.
Release all your expectations into the universe.
Think about what you have always wanted in your life and, most importantly, in your relationships.
Be careful not to rush into a new relationship because of the old one.
You’ll find it difficult to make it work out.
First, you need to let yourself heal.
Then, go out and meet new people.
Try to focus on those things that bring you the greatest joy because they will make a huge difference in your life.
Let go of whatever is unnecessary.
Learn how to let things go, let go of people who are not worth your time.
Even though this is difficult, it’s actually the best thing you can do for yourself.
8) Don’t shut others out
When you’re feeling down and sad, there’s nothing better than having someone else around to make you feel better about your current situation.
And if your friends and family are willing to do that for you, it’s a great move to take them up on their offer.
Even if you don’t want to talk about the breakup with your friends, hanging out with them will make you feel better.
Have some fun, do the things that make you feel good, and help you forget your feelings because they will come back stronger and stronger when you talk to them again.
And even though a breakup can be hard to handle, it’s important that you don’t let it make you feel like you’re a different person.
It is the worst thing for someone who has just lost their lover to become bitter and dislike everything that comes their way.
Instead, accept these difficulties as a part of life, and it will be easier for you to stay optimistic.
9) Take care of yourself
It’s easy to ignore the things you need to do when you’re sad, but that’s not a good idea.
And it’s important that you take care of yourself and your health because otherwise, you might be feeling down for a very long time.
Choose to eat good food and create a good exercise routine.
This can help you to feel better about life, and it will boost your mood so you will be able to move on with your life.
You should also take time to sleep because that can help you deal with the problems and will make it easier for you to move on and feel stronger to deal with problems as they come.
Now, if it’s love success you’re searching for, we’ve got something that will help…
I recently took part in Life Journal, an incredible course created by teacher and life coach Jeanette Brown.
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When it comes to relationships, there’s no telling how much her advice could positively impact the way you approach your love life.
That’s because rather than tell you how to live your life, Jeanette takes a slightly different approach…
She’s created this course to help YOU take control.
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If this is the year you want to take back control over your life, check out Life Journal today.
10) Move on with your life
Even though it’s hard to do so, you have to move on with your life and find happiness and joy in other things.
Have you ever found yourself thinking about the people and relationships in your life constantly?
If you have, you probably think that it is impossible to find joy when the relationship with the guy you love doesn’t work out.
Well, if you manage to tailor one moment of joy, you will soon realize that every day gets easier, and you are able to see just how beautiful life can be.
If you are able to look back and see the beauty in the small things, you will be able to find happiness regardless of your relationship status.
The people around you, the moments that make up your life, are all worth being treasured, and eventually learning to appreciate each one for what it is.
Turn to other people for help, organize camping trips or anything else that you enjoy, have fun and make new friends.
So, make an effort to meet up with some of your old friends, or simply find people in new places and spend time with them.
Be sure to get out there and enjoy the company of others so you can get a good laugh and forget about the past.
It is never easy to see the person you love so much with someone else enjoying their life and moving on even though you just ended your relationship.
This is the part where you will probably feel betrayed and surprised because you believed that your love was deeper.
But when it comes to your relationship and overcoming these feelings, there is something you can do to feel better.
And it’s as simple as taking a breath.
When I was struggling the most in life, I was introduced to an incredible free breathwork video created by the shaman, Rudá Iandê.
With a focus on dissolving stress and boosting inner peace, it was hard to resist giving it a go.
But with the turbulence of emotions I was facing and the pain of facing insecurities, I didn’t have high hopes. I had little self-esteem and confidence? Out of the window.
So, what made this breathwork video so effective?
Well, it comes down to the man behind it all. Rudá created these unique flows using a combination of ancient shamanic techniques and healing breathwork sequences.
He’s spent years developing them to help people find their inner peace.
So, if you feel a disconnect with yourself due to your relationship issues, I’d recommend checking out Rudá’s free breathwork video.
He’ll give you the tools to start injecting peace and confidence back into your life from the very first breathwork exercise.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.