Most women have wondered if the male coworker that keeps coming around is just being friendly, or if he’s interested in more.
So how can you tell?
I’ll show you 15 things that hint he’s being more than just friendly.
So let’s get started.
15 ways to tell he’s being more than friendly
Here’s what to look out for.
1) He asks about your weekend and personal life
There’s more to figuring out if your coworker likes you than this point but it’s a good place to start.
Nice people are always interested in the lives of others, so this sign isn’t a dead giveaway. However, it’s important to note how well he listens when you talk about your day.
It’s also important to note how many questions he asks, as well as how detailed and in-depth he lets you get.
If he listens earnestly, remembers previous weekends, keeps asking questions, etc, it’s a good indicator that maybe his interest goes beyond just friendliness.
However, keep an eye out for other signs, too, as this one alone doesn’t necessarily point to anything more.
2) Lighthearted teasing
Again, often a sign of friendliness and camaraderie, lighthearted teasing is something some people do to keep morale up and also to keep the boring workday interesting.
So it’s not necessarily a dead giveaway as to a male coworker’s feelings toward you. However, it’s often a form of flirting and a way that a coworker might be signaling to you that he’s interested in you as more than a friend.
How often does he like to tease you and about what?
Obviously, there’s a line between keeping things lighthearted and just being mean, but we’re talking about a friendly coworker who might like you as more than a friend.
So, with that in mind, paying attention to his mannerisms is important.
Does he like to tease other people? Or is it just you?
If his mannerisms change when you come around or if it seems like the way he teases you is different than other coworkers, it’s probably a hint that he’s into you.
Here are some more signs that a guy is physically attracted to you.
3) He remembers things about you
Most guys have a hard time remembering things and tuning in when girls are talking. For whatever reason, it’s just true.
Not in every case, of course, but often enough.
In the workplace, men are likely to listen more as it’s important to communicate and coordinate as a team. However, things become a little bit different when you realize that your coworker is not only listening to you but remembering things.
Does he let slip that he remembers details about you, your interests, your dislikes, and your personal life?
If so, it’s a sign that he’s definitely into you. He loves learning things about you and isn’t about to forget those things.
It’s a big hint as to his true feelings.
4) Compliment showers
There’s no denying that friendly people like giving compliments. Personally, it’s one of my favorite ways to make a person’s day better.
Importantly, I will say I sometimes give women compliments about their appearance that might make them think I’m being more than just friendly, even if I’m not.
With that in mind, if your coworker gives you a nice compliment, it’s not an immediate giveaway that he has feelings for you.
What does point to something more than friendliness, though, is if he makes a habit out of it.
Furthermore, if you notice that you’re the only one getting these kinds of compliments or if you’re the only one that he showers with them, take it as a hint.
Those compliment showers might just be a big sign that he’s super into you.
Flirting is usually pretty easy to spot. Sometimes, though, it can be easily missed.
To decipher if he’s being more than friendly, make sure to pay attention to how he interacts with you. His stance, tone, and manner will help you figure out if he’s flirting with you.
So what are some key signs of flirting?
Well, there’s physical contact, light touching (appropriate, of course), and things of that nature. Laughing, teasing, being silly, and using your name fondly are good indicators.
The way he talks to his other coworkers will help you decide if he’s flirting, too. Chances are, if he’s really into you, he won’t be interacting with them like he does with you. With you, it’s different, because he likes you.
Here are some ways to tell if your boss is flirting with you and what you can do about it.
6) How shy is he?
This is less of a specific sign and more something to keep in mind when trying to figure out if your coworker likes you or is just being friendly. It can be significantly harder to figure out if he’s really shy.
The signs become less apparent and maybe even more ambivalent.
Does he talk much to other coworkers or does he mostly keep to himself?
If that’s the case, when he does talk to you or make an effort to connect with you in some way, it likely means more. He’s singling you out and making an extra effort due to his shyness.
Or maybe he gets really shy around you but doesn’t around other girls. Some guys get super nervous around girls that they like. Maybe he stutters when he tries to talk to you, or wrings his hands, or stands awkwardly.
The point is this: if he’s normally shy and plucks up the courage to talk to you or if he really only gets shy around you, it’s a good indicator that he’s interested in you romantically.
Here’s a bunch of signs he likes you but he’s just nervous.
7) Body language
Body language is almost always a dead giveaway. What do I mean?
Well, it’s pretty hard for people to control their body language, especially when they’re in the moment, feeling passionate, or really into someone. It’s kind of like a silent symphony.
In other words, when you pay attention to your coworker’s body language, you’ll be able to get a good read on how he feels towards you.
Does he make eye contact with you, fiddle with his hair, smile when you talk, give priority to you in social situations, or anything similar?
If so, his body language is revealing that he likes you.
8) Excuses to interact
There’s plenty of reasons coworkers have to interact on a daily basis. It only makes sense that if he’s into you, he’ll look for any excuse to interact. How do I mean?
Well, it could be anything from asking a question about a client, wanting assistance with some kind of project, et cetera.
If you’re in the service industry, perhaps rolling silverware at the same time as you, prepping the same foods in the kitchen, or things like this.
Really, it could be any kind of excuse, no matter how trivial. He just wants a reason to interact with you and see your beautiful face.
Actually, then, the more trivial of an excuse it is, the more obvious it is that he’s into you, and not just as a coworker but a potential love interest.
9) The breakroom
The breakroom is a haven of social interaction. Here is where employees come far and wide to commingle and gossip and waste time while maybe even getting free snacks (bagel Fridays, anyone?)
If a coworker is into you, he’s well aware that this is a potential place where he can not only see you in passing but have the time and setting to get to know you better.
Really then, the way he behaves in the breakroom could be a big indicator of his level of interest in you.
So keep an eye out for him in the breakroom. Does he make note of when you head there so that maybe he can grab his water bottle as an excuse to rendezvous there with his crush?
The breakroom is a great way to figure out if your coworker is into you or if he’s just being friendly.
10) Smoke break?
If you’re not a smoker, this point doesn’t apply.
Also, it’s important to note that this point is not condoning smoking, as it is detrimental to your health.
Disclaimers aside, many employees love smoke breaks because they have an excuse to get away from their screens midday or step away from the craziness of the kitchen for a few minutes.
If your male coworker is interested in you romantically, he might be purposefully lining up your smoke breaks so you can both be outside at the same time.
Even more so, then, if he invites you outside for a smoke break with him. It’s almost like a socially acceptable “work date”.
Bonding over a cigarette is a great way to build familiarity, get to know you better, and establish a relationship beyond just secular.
In this way, then, the smoke break is a wonderful barometer for figuring out if he likes you or is just being friendly.
11) Offers up his help
In the spirit of cooperation and teamwork, it’s not unusual to help out coworkers as they need it.
Whether it’s to finish a project, meet a deadline, buss a table, get an order out, or anything else, teamwork is a vital tool in the workplace. But, it’s also a way to figure out if someone is into you or not.
It crosses the line from being helpful and into flirtation when he starts to offer his help for things that you can clearly handle on your own.
It’s not that he thinks you can’t do it, but rather because he’s looking for any excuse to talk to you, interact with you, and spend time with you.
“Acts of service” is also one of the key 5 love languages. This one might be his primary language if you catch on to him always offering up his help. If you’re interested in him also, soak up the attention and let him help out, who knows where things could go.
However, if it’s a nuisance and a bother because you’re just not interested in reciprocating, don’t be afraid to rebuff him and tell him that if you need help, you will ask him specifically.
12) He’s asked if you’re single
It’s always the dead giveaway, isn’t it?
When someone asks you if you’re single, it’s usually because they’re interested in you as more than just a friend.
On the other hand, though, that doesn’t have to be the case. Take into consideration the context, the way he asked, and what his reaction was when you gave him an answer.
I know I’ve innocently asked many people about their relationship status and I wasn’t trying to flirt with them.
If it seemed like a big disappointment to find that you’re not single, then he was probably asking because he likes you romantically.
On the flip side, did his eyes light up when he found out you were single? If so, it’s a big-time clue.
If he was indifferent to your response, it could have just been a normal thought that ran through his head because of the conversation you were having.
In any case, once he’s asked if you’re single or not, be on the lookout for any of these other signs, too.
And if you are single, here are some big reasons why you might never find true love.
13) How he treats you versus how he treats others
We’ve touched on this very briefly in a few of the other points but it’s important enough to mention as its own sign.
Why? Because it’s that distinguishing of a characteristic.
Pay close attention to your coworker’s behavior around other people. How does he treat them? What’s his body language? Is he just as friendly to them as he is to you?
If there’s a big disparity between how he treats other coworkers and how he treats you, it could be a sign that he’s either hiding his feelings for you or trying to make them known.
Here’s what I mean: if he’s more nervous and reserved around you, it could be because he’s trying to hide how he really feels.
On the flip side, if he’s more friendly, smiles more, makes more jokes, or anything similar, it could be because he’s hinting that he likes you. Not just as a coworker, either, but as a love interest.
14) He’s mentioned his relationship status
This one’s a pretty big indicator as well. It’s not often that relationship statuses come up in conversation completely by accident.
If you suddenly realize during or after a conversation with a coworker who might be into you that he casually dropped his relationship status, heads up. You didn’t even have to ask.
So what did he say? Was he single, taken, or otherwise? If he mentioned that he was single, he could be advertising to you that he’s interested in you, if you’re into him too.
However, if it came up that he’s taken, has a girlfriend, or he’s even married, then he’s hopefully just being friendly, and not looking to be unfaithful. But maybe that’s what you’re into.
Here are some tips to help you seduce a married man.
15) Ask him (if it seems appropriate)
At the end of the day, we really can’t be sure of people’s intentions fully, unless they make things explicitly clear.
So if you’re still unsure after running through these big signs, it might be a good idea to ask him.
If you are into him and interested in a potential relationship of some kind, don’t be afraid to be forward. How?
Make it clear to him that you’re flirting, making an advance, or anything similar. You could also ask him out for drinks after work on Friday.
What about if you aren’t interested?
Well, you could start a conversation with him about it. Gently bring up his behavior and ask him if he was intending to come onto you. Or if he’s already made you uncomfortable, let him know how his actions have made you feel.
If you’re not that interested in him romantically, politely let him know that you’d like to keep things professional.
And no matter what, remember to be clear, respectful, and appropriate.
To sum it up
Workplace relationships can be tricky. Having to see these people every day, interact with them, get along with them, and work beside them can lead to any number of pitfalls and disagreements.
In other words, adding the element of romance into things often makes things all the more complicated.
These pointers will hopefully help you clear the waters and remove the mystery behind whether or not that male coworker that’s been coming around is just being friendly or if he really likes you.
What you do after you’ve figured it out is completely up to you and what you’re looking for.
Maybe that means going out for drinks next weekend. Alternatively, it might mean setting some more definitive boundaries to keep things professional.
In any case, make sure that you’re being respected, company policy is being followed, and that your personal space is not being violated.
You deserve to be treated with dignity and humanity, no matter the circumstances.
And if you’ve realized that the cute coworker you’ve had your eye on has also had his eyes on you, don’t be afraid to capitalize on it.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
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