Breaking up with your partner is always tough. No matter whether you got dumped or were the one who dodged the bullet, you probably wonder whether you and your ex were meant to be.
Well, if this question is keeping you up all night, you’ve come to the right place.
In this article, I’ve put together 20 signs you and your ex are definitely meant to be together. Buckle up because we’re about to recall some of the memories from your relationship and do some reflecting upon them!
1) The reason you broke up isn’t valid anymore
I’m beginning with this one because I don’t want you to make a rash decision just because you miss your ex.
Once the relationship is over and you move past the initial mourning period, you’ll likely start remembering the good stuff – how you met, your first date, first kiss, warm hugs, passionate kisses, and other intimate moments you shared with one another. These types of memories can cloud your judgment. Believe me, we’ve all been there.
The key in such a situation is to be brave, move past the feeling, and be candid with yourself. There was a reason or two that resulted in a breakup, and these negative experiences outweighed the positive ones at some point.
Are the reasons you broke up still present? And if so, are they still valid?
If time and distance allowed you to move past the reasons that initiated the breakup with your ex, then it can be a sign that you and your ex are meant to be.
Maybe you fought over a silly thing; maybe you even acted upon pride, or a heated argument led to a rash decision! Certainly, you should not let the pettiness get in the way of true love; but just to be sure that true love is in fact the case, let’s move further and dig deeper into your past relationship.
2) You were deeply connected
In life, we meet and befriend many people but feeling a deep connection is a rare occurrence. No matter whether you believe in soulmates or not, there are certain people who understand you on another level.
With some people, you just click – you get each other without words, your energy and intentions match, the level of emotional maturity is equal… It’s like finding your own person – a match made in heaven if you will.
Such deep connections are very rare. So if you had a special, unbreakable bond with your ex partner, you probably struggle to find the same spark with someone else. The reason? You and your ex just might be meant for each other!
3) Your sex life was amazing
While physical attraction should not be a mere reason for reconciling with the former partner, it can be one of the major signs you and your ex are meant to be.
There is great sex without true love, but there is no true love without great sex! When you have a strong spiritual bond with someone, your body follows as well.
So take time to think about your sex life with your ex – were you 100% comfortable with your body and your desires when you were with them? Did you feel the kind of fireworks that you’ve never felt with anyone else?
If you have positive answers to these questions, then it’s one of the tell-tale signs that you are meant to be with your ex.
4) You accepted each other
Even if you have a deep meaningful connection with someone, you will definitely have your differences as well. This is just how humans work.
Very often, once the first few months of the relationship (a.k.a honeymoon period) are over, we face an ugly truth. At this stage, we realize that our partner has some habits, interests, or opinions that we don’t quite like or agree with.
There are two ways this situation usually goes – you either try to change the other person or you accept them for who they are. Guess which option resembles a meant-to-be kind of relationship?
Of course the latter!
Acceptance is the core of a healthy and nurturing relationship. And there is no “meant to be” without feeling comfortable being who you are when you are with your significant other. If you both were able to make your peace with your differences, then the relationship can definitely be worth revisiting.
5) You were best friends
Romance is all fun and games but being best friends with your partner is a whole another dimension. If you take away all the “couply” stuff out of the relationship but the connection still remains valuable, it means that you and your partner are true friends, which, in my humble opinion, is the foundation of a meant-to-be kind of love.
Nothing can compare when you simply enjoy hanging out with your partner and talking endlessly about random stuff. After all, the honeymoon phase and lovey-dovey mood are not constant but friendship always is.
So if breaking up with your partner also meant losing your best friend, you should definitely rethink the decision.
6) You were having fun on a daily basis
When it comes to the meant-to-be type of love, it is crucial to be able to have fun together. A concept of soulmates and lifelong partners is sought after by many but very few people actually realize that a lifetime is actually a pretty long time.
In long-term relationships, falling into a routine is just inevitable. So it is important that you and your chosen one can have fun on a daily basis and most importantly – with small things. With the one, even mundane tasks such as grocery shopping or cooking are extremely enjoyable.
Ask yourself these – was your ex the type of person that made even the dullest day a bit more bearable? Was your relationship fun, even without all the romantic dates and night outs? If your answer is yes, then there is a big chance that you and your ex are destined to be together.
7) You trusted each other
Trust is an essential component for any relationship and I can’t emphasize this enough!
If your ex is really, truly the one, you need to be able to trust them and vice versa. It is just impossible to always be in the know about your partner’s location, what they are doing, and who they are doing it with. And trust is a tool that will build a foundation of a healthy, stable relationship that lasts.
However, trust is not something we take for granted, especially when it comes to reconnecting with a former partner. The key is realizing that you will have to build trust over time, which can take time, effort, and most importantly – consistency.
Don’t expect to start trusting your ex out of the blue and vice versa – don’t expect unconditional trust from your ex. You guys will have to prove to each other with actions, every single day that you value the connection and deserve to be trusted.
8) You don’t hold any grudges
Think about the last couple of months of your relationship, when the crisis started creeping up on you. There may have been moments when you felt mistreated by your partner, maybe you even felt like they took your love for granted.
Are you ready to leave it all behind? And by leaving it all behind, I mean ALL of it.
When you decide to rebuild the relationship, you need to be able to start from scratch. If you hold grudges against your partner, there is a huge chance that it will result in another crisis.
Don’t get me wrong, of course, you should communicate your feelings with your ex, talk about what went wrong, and how certain situations made you feel, so you avoid those in the future. However, make sure you’re able to forgive, move on, and allow yourself to enjoy the connection from a whole new perspective.
9) You can’t stay mad at each other
When you have a deep connection with someone, a special kind that is built on trust and understanding, it is hard to stay mad. Sure, it is perfectly natural to get pissed at their actions from time to time.
However, when it’s the right person, you are able to resolve conflicts quickly.
The important factor here is that the solution should come from honest communication, not from ignoring the issue. If you and your ex have managed to do it, then your connection is definitely worth revisiting.
10) You had good communication
Clear, honest, and consistent communication is truly a virtue when it comes to relationships. Couples who practice the art of expressing their feelings with words can turn any hardship around.
Very often, relationships don’t quite work out because we assume that our partners must automatically know how we feel. According to the survey, poor communication is the #1 reason why couples split up.
But this is not the case when you’re with the right person.
If you and your ex had great communication when you both shared your thoughts freely, felt heard, and understood, there is a strong chance that you’re meant to be.
11) Respect each other’s boundaries
Acknowledging and respecting each other’s boundaries is yet another essential for every relationship.
Many times, couples have a hard time communicating their boundaries with one another because they don’t want to give a wrong idea. But belittling your personal needs for the sake of others is never a good approach nor will it result in a peaceful, happy relationship.
When you and your ex are meant to be together, then you are able to respect each other’s boundaries. With the right person, you don’t have to explain why you need to take time for yourself – self-care is important, and the person that loves you knows and cherishes that.
12) Time and distance did you no justice
When you are in a relationship, especially a long-term one, it becomes hard to be apart from the person. And it doesn’t necessarily mean that we’re facing a meant-to-be situation.
Let’s be honest – attachment and habit can play an important role in missing a former flame. Especially in the initial period after break up.
So as you’re reading this, looking for signs that you and your ex are meant to be, ask yourself – are you past the initial breakup shock? Did you give yourself some time and space to reflect on everything that happened?
If you indeed did so but still have the same strong (or maybe stronger) feelings towards your former flame, then it can be a definite sign that they are your endgame.
13) They boosted your self-confidence
Self-confidence and happy relationships go hand in hand. In my experience and according to the research, healthy relationships craft self-confident individuals. Although, this thought is a bit hard to put in the right words without you getting the wrong idea, so let me break it down for you:
The relationship itself should not be a source of your self-confidence. It is a very unhealthy practice that won’t end well for either party. Self-confidence is a very personal thing, which can only be built from within. If you rely on your partner to feed your confidence, it will fall apart as soon as the relationship does.
Now let’s look at this subject from a healthier angle.
Yes, building self-confidence is a one-way street, however, a supportive partner can help you stay on the path. They will be there when you start doubting yourself and help you realize that you indeed are capable of tackling every obstacle that seems too hard for you.
So to sum up – if you and your former partner supported each other through your individual journeys towards building self-confidence, then it can be a definite sign that you and your ex are meant to be.
14) You gave each other privacy
One of the most common misconceptions about relationships is that a couple needs to know everything about one another. In reality, a healthy relationship should allow both individuals to maintain privacy to some extent.
And it does not equal being secretive – secrecy means hiding information, while privacy is about being unobserved. Simple as that!
Now let’s go back to you and your ex’s situation:
Did you guys have a hard time leaving each other unobserved? Were you able to keep some parts of your life to yourself without feeling the pressure to share? Do some good hard thinking about these topics before you decide whether you and your ex are meant to be together.
15) You gave each other personal space
Maintaining healthy personal space in relationships is extremely important, especially when it comes to long-term commitment.
Being in a healthy relationship requires you to still be a fulfilled individual outside the two of you. Practicing personal space is different for everyone – for some, it is going out with friends, for others, it is taking evening walks alone.
Regardless of the specifics, spending time apart is crucial for two reasons:
- You keep a connection with your inner self and maintain individuality.
- You allow yourself to miss the other person and appreciate the time you spend together even more.
So if you and your ex are meant to be, you must be masters of giving personal space to one another, without it hurting your relationship!
16) You brought out the best in each other
Some people believe that how you evolve as a person solely depends on you. I’d say that it also depends on your circle. You can work on becoming a better version of yourself as much as you want but if people you surround yourself with are not on the same path in life, it will influence your development as well.
So we need to be very mindful when deciding who to hang out with, especially when choosing a lifelong partner. Is your ex someone who supported your goals and made you feel comfortable pursuing your dreams? Did they help you find motivation when you felt like doing nothing? Then you found a keeper!
A person who brings out the best in you and helps you achieve your goals is a person who is there for the long haul.
17) You were each other’s peace
In our culture, toxic relationships are often praised and even marketed as unconditional love. I’ve seen so many couples, both real and fictional, who are always at each other’s throats but justify it with being passionately in love.
Constant arguing, calling each other names, causing drama just for the sake of it… even if it all ends in a passionate make-out session, will not bring you happiness. At least not in the long run.
The right person should be supportive and bring you peace instead of chaos. Nothing compares to the feeling of comfort and calmness that comes from the nurturing relationship. Did you and your ex have this kind of connection? Then it’s yet another sign that you are meant to be together!
18) You were there for each other
“I’ll be there for you through thick and thin” is one of the major promises you’ll come across in any wedding vows. It does not matter whether you consider marrying your ex in the future or you have a different arrangement in mind, this particular phrase is something you definitely need to think about.
We all know that life is a rollercoaster full of ups and downs. The problems will arise and occupy your mind completely, which can make you “hard to love” at times.
Situations of this kind put the relationship to test.
When you face hardships in different aspects of life, your partner’s support is crucial. Of course, you cannot and should not expect them to solve your problems for you. It’s just really important that they are there for you when you feel like the universe has turned its back on you.
So to sum up, you and your ex may be made for each other if you have helped each other go through tough times and came out stronger in the end.
19) You got along well with each other’s family & friends
Another big aspect that determines whether a person is meant for you is the relationship they have with your family and friends. After all, once you take your love to another level, their family becomes yours and vice versa. The same logic applies to friends but in a more low-key manner.
When your partner has a rocky relationship with your family and friends it is extremely hard to be at peace. You will likely be in the middle all the time, constantly stressed, sometimes even made to choose sides.
On the other hand, if your significant other gets along well with your friends and family, the relationship simply blossoms! It is a relief when all your loved ones approve of your relationship and love the person you chose to be with.
Did your ex have a positive relationship with your family and friends? If your answer is yes then congratulations – you have yet another sign that your ex might as well be your endgame.
20) You agree on fundamentals
Last but not least, the most prominent sign that you and your ex are meant to be together is if you share the same beliefs about fundamentals. Let’s call them “relationship non-negotiables.”
While relationships are all about compromises and meeting each other halfway, there are certain things you simply can’t change for another person. No matter how strong the love is.
Let’s take a look at some of the relationship non-negotiable examples:
- Having kids
- Career goals
- Religious beliefs
- Political views
- Moral principles at large
This list can be shorter or quite long, varying from person to person. But overall, I think you get what I mean when I say that there’s no “meant to be” unless you agree on the fundamentals. These beliefs are what make you up as an individual, therefore, changing those for a relationship will result in losing who you are.
I can go even further – everything we discussed above, all 19 signs that you and your ex are meant to be together are void if you don’t check out the 20th one. In short, true love can work wonders but it fails when two people are just too different in their worldviews.
So I have a final verdict for you – if you and your ex have the same beliefs when it comes to having kids, getting married, etc, you can get through anything and live your meant-to-be life together!
So, are you and your ex meant to be?
We had quite a drill down didn’t we? I strongly believe that analyzing these 20 signs you and your ex are meant to be together will help you make the final decision.
The only thing left for me is to wish you that your ex is on the same page!
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