Sometimes you feel misunderstood—that they see you as someone weird or bitchy or complicated.
Don’t let that get to you. In fact, hold your head up high.
The real reason you’re feeling this way is because you’re a unique woman and most people actually respect (and even envy) you for it.
Check out how many of these “unique woman” traits you have to know for sure.
1) You say what you mean
You’re honest, and proud of it.
You don’t like having to filter your thoughts or sugarcoat your words because you believe that the only way things can get better is when people are honest.
That doesn’t mean you’re going to go out of your way to be unnecessarily mean, of course. You’re honest, not an asshole. So you spend time making sure your words actually get your point across, in just the right way.
Let’s say that you’re in a room with a few others, and one of yours shares an idea. Everyone else thinks it’s brilliant, but you think that there are some problems with it.
So instead of staying quiet or agreeing with them, you try to talk to them about your problems with their ideas—kindly.
2) You mean what you say
Whatever leaves your lips come straight from your heart and mind.
You don’t say things just to please people or get them off your back—you truly mean what you say.
You try to fulfill the promises you make, are genuine with the thoughts and praises you give.
You’re not like those people who don’t put weight on their words because you believe it’s a requirement to live life with integrity.
3) People value your opinion
Since you’re not afraid to say what you really think and feel, you’re considered a gem to people who need honest feedback.
Aside from this, you also truly have unique thoughts and ideas because you’re not worried about being nice and impressing people.
The result? Your opinions are always useful and sought after.
4) You have some enemies
A sign that you’re a unique person is that you have enemies.
It’s easy to make people angry without even meaning to. Even simply being gay or wearing certain clothes in public is enough to get people mad at you.
Most would try to do their best to change or hide so that they won’t make enemies out of people.
But not you. You understand and accept that you can’t please everybody. Trying to please everyone would make you fake.
By standing by your ideals and being yourself, you’ll definitely make a few unreasonable enemies along the way.
5) You’re unapologetically yourself
You know who you are and you’re not afraid to show your true self to the world—flaws and all. You don’t see the point of changing yourself just to fit in.
If this is still not yet you, maybe it’s time you unleash your authentic self.
You see, once we remove the social conditioning and unrealistic expectations our family, education system, even religion has put onto us, the limits to what we can achieve are endless.
I learned this (and much more) from the world-renowned shaman Rudá Iandé. In this excellent free video, Rudá explains how you can lift the mental chains and get back to the core of your being.
A word of warning, Rudá isn’t your typical shaman.
He’s not going to reveal pretty words of wisdom that offer false comfort.
Instead, he’s going to force you to look at yourself in a way you have never before. It’s a powerful approach, but one that works.
So if you’re ready to take this first step and align your dreams with your reality, there’s no better place to start than with Rudá’s unique method.
6) You’re not scared of looking like a fool
You are naturally curious and you love to experiment and try new things.
Because of this, you really don’t care if you come up with ideas that people might find stupid. You do them anyway! In fact, you want to do them precisely because you want to prove them wrong.
Most women care so much about how others see them, but not you.
You have bigger goals and you don’t want self-consciousness to get in the way.
7) Nobody has ever called you “basic”
You don’t follow fashion trends. In fact, you’d rather not wear whatever is in fashion!
You don’t like eating what everyone eats, you don’t like watching what everyone watches…you’re very much aware of how media and advertisements shape us to become the same.
Yes, you might be simple but you’re anything but a simpleton.
8) You attract other unique people
Do you often find yourself in the company of interesting people?
Chances are, you’re definitely one.
As they say, birds of the same feather flock together. But not only that, you also influence each other, and encourage each other to be your best selves.
9) You’re expressive
You don’t just express yourself using words, you also do it in many creative ways.
When there’s something that you have to explain to people, you may use other means than what’s expected. It results in them getting more hooked on what you’re saying.
Maybe you draw, paint, sing, dance, or play an instrument.
You use these hobbies to express your emotions and thoughts.
10) You’re naturally curious
You are fascinated with everything—from how cheeses are made to the childhood life of Putin. And you geek out about them. You’d even forget to eat sometimes because you’re too engrossed in your obsessions.
Others just dabble, but you dive deep to follow your curiosity. And this makes you a unique person. Because you learn a lot, it’s natural that you think differently, too.
11) You hate gender stereotypes
First of all, you really hate the word “should”. And you especially hate it when it comes to gender stereotypes. In fact, a part of you hates the title of this article a little.
Why should men always wear their hair short? Why should women stay at home while their man goes to work?
You often try to question society’s expectations on women and men, and you never want to subscribe to it.
12) You question everything
They call you the “why” girl because you always ask why.
If a colleague tells you to do something, and it’s not clear to you why they would need such things, you’re not afraid to ask why. In fact, you can’t do anything without knowing the reason why it’s worth doing.
This applies to everything else in your life, of course. You question how things are done and it’s not because you’re just a contrarian, it’s because you really want to know why things are the way they are.
13) People are drawn to you
Unique people are rare to find. That’s why when you’re one, people are naturally drawn to you.
They’d want to pick your brain. They’d want to know how you live your life…because you’re different from most women.
Some guys might even make moves on you because they just can’t help it. Even if you’re not the prettiest in the room, you’re the most interesting. And that’s hotter than pretty.
14) You have interesting stories to tell
You’re probably living a colorful life precisely because you’re unique. Because of this, you have a lot of stories to tell.
You have grand adventures and sizzling date stories (not to mention, a lot of embarrassing moments) that you’re willing to share candidly.
You’re actually glad that they happened to you and you’re excited to experience more adventures to tell your future children.
15) You’ve got your own style
You’d never get caught wearing what the Kardashians are wearing…because you don’t want to be like everyone else. You want to create your own style so that it’s 100% you.
You’re not afraid to experiment with fashion and to look a bit different. Heck, you’re not even scared they’d think you have bad taste.
What matters more to you is that you have a style that’s your own.
And it’s not limited to fashion. It’s also the way you carry yourself and you do things.
16) You’re done with people-pleasing
It’s possible that you aren’t always this way. Maybe you’re like most girls, too.
But then you realized that you’re really different from them. So you ditched the urge to please people. And now you feel so free!
This shows in your aura. You might not flaunt anything but you’re confident in yourself and your choices.
You’re hella proud of yourself for breaking away from the chains of what a proper woman should be, and you wish others would do the same.
17) You carve your own path
Most people think success is having an office job, four kids, and a loving husband by your side. That, or being a famous billionaire like Steve Jobs or Elon Musk.
So they try to live their lives chasing society’s idea of success or following the footsteps of successful people.
But you don’t want that. Why should you live another person’s life when you can live yours instead? Why should you live according to what others think will make you happy when you can pursue the things that you know gives you joy right now?
Say, you might be polyamorous, in which case being in a marriage probably won’t be for you. Or you might be a nature lover, in which case being in the urban jungle is the very last thing you want.
You carve your own path in life. Some people might judge you for it, and others might be amazed. You couldn’t care less.
18) You have no idols
You hate idolatry because for you, it kills individuality.
Sure, you may admire celebrities and other successful people but you never put them on a pedestal. You don’t even want to praise the ground they walk on.
You get inspiration, but you don’t go crazy over them and want to be just like them.
19) You love with all of your heart
Most women are already guarded, especially if they’re already in their twenties.
But not you. You want to love with all of your heart. If there’s one thing you want to be slightly reckless about, it’s love.
You enjoy the ride but you’re not stupid. You also know that it could end.
20) You’re self-aware
They say common sense is not common. But what’s less common is self-awareness.
Many people are delusional or always in denial. They lack awareness of their flaws. But not you. You know your strengths and weaknesses.
This makes it easier for you to form strong connections, at the same time it also helps you make sound decisions in your life—from what kind of career to pursue to the kind of roommates to choose.
It doesn’t mean you’re not flexible or you don’t want to change some of your flaws, of course. You’re constantly trying to improve yourself.
However, you also honor who you are—including your flaws and weaknesses—so although you try to improve, you also don’t want to totally erase who you are unless those traits and habits are really bad for you and the people around you.
21) People see you as a rebel
People have told you that you’re a bit of a rebel. Perhaps this will surprise you because, as far as you are concerned, you aren’t even trying to be a rebel.
Chances are that people are calling you a rebel because you stand out. Because, even without intending to rebel, you simply choose not to conform to the things you disagree with.
You aren’t afraid to dress or think differently, or to ask the questions that other people are too afraid to ask. People respect you for that, even when they don’t necessarily agree with it.
Around people who are content to be the same as everyone else, simply being yourself can be seen as an act of rebellion.
22) You don’t believe everything you see
You sometimes get told that you’re a killjoy or that you should try to be less of a contrarian.
But as far as you are concerned, everyone else trusts what they hear and see way too easily, especially if it’s from someone they know.
While you may perhaps wonder if they’re right every now and then, you keep finding yourself being proven right more often than not. Everyone else falls to scams and hoaxes while you just sit back and resist the urge to say “I told you so.”
By being skeptical, you stand out from the crowd.
23) You inspire others
People come to you every now and then to tell you that you have inspired them.
Perhaps they became a better person because of your example, or that because of something you did they decided to pursue their dreams.
Sometimes this can surprise you, because you don’t think you’ve been trying to inspire others at all.
But that’s the secret. You make other people do better simply by being yourself.
24) You are very open
You’ve always thought of yourself as an open person.
You don’t judge when someone shares ideas or opinions different from yours, or when you meet someone obviously different.
And when people ask you about yourself, you aren’t afraid to answer. You aren’t interested in trying to project an atmosphere of “mystery” or anything—so long as it isn’t something that would put you in danger, you’re not afraid to talk about it.
It takes a certain bravery and strength of will to be so open. Most people are suspicious of that which is different, and try hard to not give away too much of themselves at once.
25) You don’t give a damn about being unique
The funny thing about being unique is that so many people try too hard to be “unique” that they all end up doing the same things anyways.
Ironically, they end up being the very opposite of “unique”.
You, on the other hand, don’t see the point in it. You don’t try to do “weird” or “rebellious” things just so that you can be seen as someone unique.
You agree with the mainstream when you think it makes sense, and go against it when you think it doesn’t.
And having a balanced and nuanced worldview does more to make you unique than blind rebellion does.
How many of these traits do you have?
If you see yourself in at least half of the signs, then there’s no question—you’re indeed a unique woman.
Everyone in this world is born unique but we’re slowly raised to become more or less the same. Good on you that you don’t follow a straight path.
You’re a rare breed and you must guard your uniqueness with all of your might.
Don’t be discouraged when people react differently just because you prefer to NOT fit the mold that society has created for women.
Instead, I encourage you to be totally unapologetic about it. This is the only way people—but especially women—shine bright!
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.