Not everybody feels confident in the love department.
You might be crushing on someone quite a lot, but just be too embarrassed, shy, or even to proud to make a move.
If that’s the case, then it’s important to recognize signs that someone likes you, but they aren’t ready to admit it.
If you notice that someone is acting differently around you, then it might be because they like you.
Here are 14 strong signs he likes you but is playing it cool.
1) He gives you his attention
Giving you his attention can include quite a few things.
When you see him, he might make an effort to talk to you, rather than just say hi and quickly wander off to chat to someone else.
He won’t be looking at his phone or scanning the room to see what other people are doing — his attention is firmly on you.
When you talk to him, he really listens to you and remembers things you tell him, even potentially the smallest of details.
He asks you questions that show he is taking an interest in you, and your life.
When we’re into someone, even though we’re playing it cool, we still want to be around them and tend to focus on them whenever we’re together.
2) He teases you
Teasing you is actually another way of him giving you his attention.
That attention certainly doesn’t have to mean following you around like a lost puppy or giving you countless compliments.
In fact, when he is playing it cool that’s pretty unlikely.
Teasing someone is actually a really flirty thing to do. Of course there’s a big difference between saying mean things or just being plain old rude and “teasing”.
It should be playful, and only gentle and innocent jokes. You may even have this dynamic where you both engage in back and forth lighthearted banter.
3) He makes eye contact with you
Making eye contact is one of those little gestures that says so much without having to speak a word.
Eye contact is a very powerful sign of attraction. It means that he wants to look at you and connect with you.
Perhaps if he’s shy he’ll break eye contact and look away because his feelings make him uncomfortable.
Other times he might hold your gaze just a beat or too longer than feels normal.
Either way, if he’s attracted to you, you might just sense it when he looks at you.
4) He finds excuses to make physical contact
If you notice that he keeps touching you throughout the day, then chances are he has a crush on you.
We’re not talking about anything extreme or obvious. This could be as simple as hugging you when you meet or say goodbye.
Maybe a gentle tap on the shoulder, a touch of the arm, or leaning in towards you when you talk.
He might even use excuses like “play fighting” as a way of getting close. But if he does it repeatedly, then chances are he likes you.
5) He tries to not seem jealous but you get the feeling he is
If you’ve ever mentioned an ex or another guy (who he worries could be competition) around him, he seems to get really awkward.
He may try to shrug it off, make a joke or even act like it’s no problem and he isn’t bothered. But you still sense something in the way he behaves that tells you he doesn’t like it.
When we’re interested in someone, we don’t want to hear about love rivals, and it can be difficult to hide how we feel.
6) He shows off around you
Showing off is one of the subtle things our egos do in the hopes of impressing. So if he shows off around you, it could mean he likes you.
That showing off might be:
- a) Showing off his knowledge and trying to impress you with his smarts
- b) Being funny and telling jokes (and always looking to see your reaction)
- c) Showing off his masculinity and trying to seem more manly around you
- d) Having fun and being extra playful around you
- e) Being confident and proud around you
Basically, if he seems to be going out of his way to prove something to you, then he might be attracted to you but is trying to be cool about it.
7) He always says yes when you suggest doing something
Even if he is interested in you, it doesn’t mean he is bold enough to make the move. But he will never turn down an opportunity to do something with you if you are the one initiating the plans.
Even if it’s not a one-on-one hangout and it’s just as a group— he’ll be there if he knows you are going to be there.
He makes himself available for you, which shows that you’re a priority to him. He might even cancel other plans just to see you.
This is because he wants to spend time with you. And if he is willing to go to lengths to spend time with you, he probably likes you as more than just friends.
8) You catch him looking at you
Earlier in the list, we mentioned the importance of eye contact for attraction. But not all guys feel confident enough to give you some serious eye-locking.
So if he is trying to hide his true feelings, you might simply catch him taking stolen glances your way.
He is checking you out whenever he thinks you’re not looking. If you catch him, he may quickly look away.
But it’s already too late, he has given the game away — this is a sure fire sign that he is interested in you.
9) He offers to help you out
He is happy to do you favors.
He might offer to give you a lift home and even go out of his way to do so. He might suggest helping you prepare for that exam you’ve got to take. He could offer to give you a hand moving your heavy boxes from the garage.
When a guy likes you, he wants to care for you in different ways. He wants to feel useful to you and essential in your life.
10) He doesn’t mention other girls around you
If he isn’t into you and just see you as a friend, he would have no problem talking about other girls with you.
But if he is interested in dating you, he wouldn’t talk about them.
He wouldn’t want to give the wrong impression or suggest that he is unavailable — even if he is playing it cool.
When you are attracted to someone, you want it to seem like you’re still on the market. So that means mentioning any potential love interests is totally off limits.
11) He’s been asking other people about you
You might discover that he has been asking friends or mutual acquaintances about you.
It might be simple things like finding out if you’re also going to the party or night out.
He could be asking people about what kind of girl you are, and the sort of things you are into.
If he’s trying to get info on you, then he’s clearly interested in you. He’s just trying to be more covert about it all.
12) You sense chemistry
There’s no denying that romance can be confusing.
We can feel mixed signals from people, we can feel insecure and unsure about how they really feel.
But underneath all of that is actually a powerful instinct too.
After all, us human beings have been doing this dance for thousands of years. We can often instinctively sense attraction.
You might be worried you’ve got it wrong, and question whether you are imagining things. But in your gut you feel it. You sense mutual chemistry.
There could be this electric feel between you too, and even though neither of you have said anything about it — it’s still there.
13) He acts differently with you than with other people
If he behaves differently when you’re together, it could mean he’s interested in you.
For example, if he seems to enjoy spending time with you more than others, or if he spends more time listening to you rather than chatting away with his mates.
Or maybe he starts acting differently toward you, such as being more attentive or showing interest in you more.
There’s something about the way that he is with you that isn’t “normal” compared to how he treats other people.
14) He watches all your social media stories
A lot of secret stalker types don’t make any obvious moves, yet they watch you like a hawk on social media.
He might not be sliding into your DM’s or flooding your posts with likes if he is trying to be cool, but he may well be checking up on what you post online.
If he is watching all of the stories that you post, this could mean he has a thing for you.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
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