25 signs he doesn’t love you enough (and what you should do)

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If he’s been cold and distant with you lately, if he’s started ignoring you or he’s started staying out late, there’s a chance that he might not love you as much as you think.

Although finding out that someone doesn’t love you enough may hurt, it’s best to find out sooner than later.

Here’s a list of 25 signs that he doesn’t love you enough (and what you should do):

1) He doesn’t communicate with you

If there has been a sudden change in his communication with you, especially if he’s not as communicative on the phone or when you’re together, he’s probably not as interested in you as he initially was.

Communication is the pillar of a healthy relationship and if he has started neglecting that, then something’s wrong.

Think about it:

  • He’s seldom the one to call or text you first. You always seem to be the one to contact him to see what he’s up to.
  • When you’re together, he doesn’t have much to say and tends to flip through the TV channels or stare at his phone most of the time.
  • When you have a disagreement, he’s not keen to resolve it. He either pretends it never happened and moves on to another topic, or gets upset and leaves.

In other words, he’s not open to communicating with you, either over the phone or in person.

Let him know how important communication is for you and see if he tries to communicate more.

2) He avoids you

If your partner seems to be avoiding you and is no longer interested in spending time with you, this can be a sign that he doesn’t love you enough.

He keeps finding excuses not to spend time with you:

  • He’ll say he’s busy with a project at work.
  • He needs to help his friend with something.
  • He’s got to fix stuff around the house.
  • He’s tired after the gym.

Basically, anything he can come up with not to see you. It’s obvious that he just doesn’t want to be around you.

If your partner avoids spending time with you, he could be taking you for granted. It could also be that something about you or the relationship has changed for him, and now he doesn’t have much interest in being with you anymore.

What can you do?

It’s important to make time for each other if you want to have a happy relationship. Try suggesting more fun things to do together and coming up with new activities that you think he’d be interested in.

3) He never bothers to help you out

You may need help carrying the groceries, fixing something at your place, or finishing some complicated administration. But does he ever bother to ask you if you need a hand? Hell no.

That’s why you need to bring out his inner hero.

Let me explain:

You see, there’s a new theory in the relationship world that’s causing quite a stir – it’s called the hero instinct.

Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept finally explains how men really think and feel in relationships.

And it’s something most women have never even heard of.

According to James Bauer, men don’t actually need a lot to feel content in their relationships. In fact, what they need has nothing to do with sex.

Men have certain innate drivers. And when a woman comes along and triggers them, it causes a powerful response. The result is a man who loves harder, commits wholeheartedly, and truly dedicates himself to the relationship.

So, how can you trigger your man’s hero instinct?

The easiest thing to do is to watch this simple and genuine video by James Bauer.

The truth is, once you understand how the hero instinct works, there’s no telling what heights your relationship can reach.

So if you want to give your man what he truly wants from you, make sure to check out James Bauer’s excellent video. In it, he reveals the exact texts and phrases you can use straight away.

Here’s a link to the free video again.

4) You’re not a priority in his life

If you’re not a priority in his life, then he doesn’t love you enough and you should take notice of this.

Let’s take a close look:

He’ll become vague when speaking about his plans for the weekend. He won’t tell you where he wants to go out or with whom.

It’s likely that he has a lot going on in his life and that he loves his friends, family, and work more than you.

If he has neglected to make time for you for some time now, then it’s possible that he doesn’t have much interest in the relationship anymore.

What’s more, he doesn’t seem concerned about your feelings or needs and only responds when you ask him about his whereabouts or what he’s up to.

And the solution?

Take the initiative to show him how important he is to you. Make sure to always be there for him when he needs your support and love most. This will encourage him to do the same for you.

5) He is secretive

If your partner is secretive about parts of his life, it could be another sign that he doesn’t love you enough.

You never know what he’s up to and who he’s with. He keeps saying that “it’s just guys hanging out” and that “it’s nothing important.”

But you know better. You can see that he has been keeping secrets – I’ve been there.

When you ask him about it, he just dismisses your concerns and tells you not to worry about it.

But wait there’s more: It’s possible that he’s been seeing someone else behind your back or that he’s meeting up with friends who do not have your best interest at heart.

So what can you do?

Confront him. Tell him how his secrecy makes you feel.

Make sure that your partner understands the significance of transparency. This will allow him to see how important it is to share his plans and whereabouts with you so that you don’t feel like he’s hiding things from you.

6) He makes decisions without you

When a man makes decisions without you, it’s usually because he doesn’t have much regard for what you have to say.

Maybe he feels like the relationship is one-sided, so he wants to make decisions without asking you.

Or perhaps he has started thinking that he can handle issues on his own that in fact need your input to be resolved properly.

In any case, this means that your partner doesn’t respect your opinion or that he simply doesn’t care enough about the relationship to include you in every decision that needs to be made.

Tell him that if he wants to be in a relationship with you, there are certain things he needs to discuss with you before making any decisions. That’s how a relationship works.

7) Your sex life is terrible

You seldom have sex and when you do, it’s completely passionless.

But if you want to change that, then you have to make him infatuated with you!

Dating and relationship coach Clayton Max has developed sets of phrases that are guaranteed to make any man infatuated with you.

These phrases reach men on a deep primal level – most women don’t know about this, which is why they struggle to keep a man’s infatuation.

To find out what they are, watch his video here where he explains everything.

8) He doesn’t trust you

This could be a sign that the relationship is experiencing some serious problems and that the relationship is on its way out.

He might have started thinking that it’s hard to trust and be vulnerable with you.

The thing is, if your partner continues to doubt your intentions and finds fault in everything you do, this will eventually lead to resentment and a lack of affection. This can both hurt your feelings and make you feel like you’re walking on eggshells.

If your partner doesn’t trust you, it could be that he doesn’t love you enough or that he has started to have serious doubts about the relationship.

What should you do?

He needs to be reassured of the fact that you’re trustworthy and loyal to him. This is something that will require some work and patience on your end.

If he says that he’s afraid of what you might do, talk with him about his fears until he understands why they aren’t grounded in reality.

9) He puts you down and says hurtful things

Maybe he’s not happy with himself and he’ll take it out on you. He’s probably not in tune with his feelings and therefore doesn’t know how to express them.

Or maybe he’s not happy with the relationship but instead of talking about it, he takes his frustrations out by putting you down.

He doesn’t appreciate your efforts and he harbors some feelings of inferiority or self-hatred. When you try to be supportive, he puts you down for it.

But here’s the kicker: If this happens regularly, there’s a good chance that your relationship isn’t going as well as it should be.

If it’s serious, he might be on the brink of breaking up with you. He will probably feel as if the relationship is draining all of his energy.

Now, when a man puts his partner down and says hurtful things, he’s voicing his lack of respect for her. He might be saying things he doesn’t mean in the heat of the moment – in anger or frustration – but that’s no excuse.

All in all, no matter what the reason behind his hurtful words and behavior is, this is really a sign that there isn’t much love left in the relationship. You need to tell him that his behavior is unacceptable.

If it continues for too long without a resolution or improvement, then you should consider leaving him and finding someone who will treat you with the respect you deserve.

10) He’s always in a bad mood

When your partner is generally in a bad mood all the time, it could be a sign that he just doesn’t love you enough.

Think about it:

No matter what happens at work or in other areas of his life, when he’s with you he should feel happy. Right?

He should find solace in your arms and feel good when he’s around you, no matter what else is going on in his life.

Except, if he’s in a bad mood all the time and he always seems to complain about his life, it’s possible that he’s not satisfied with your relationship either.

It’s not all bad news. If your partner is in a bad mood, don’t jump to any conclusions and take it personally.

Sometimes men can become shy around their lovers when they have some big issue to discuss with them. So, try and discuss things with him. Ask him if there’s anything you can do for him, and tell him that you’re there if he wants to talk.

11) He loses his temper easily

There are bad days when we all get really irritated, but if your partner tends to lose his temper quickly and easily, this could be an indication of something more.

Being patient and trying to understand your partner’s point of view is one of the most important things in any relationship.

On the one hand, if he loses his temper easily, it means that he isn’t taking the time to understand your side of the story and he doesn’t see the need to do so.

On the other hand, it could also be that he’s having some issues that have nothing to do with you. Unfortunately, when he’s frustrated, he lashes out at you as a result.

If he’s looking for a fight, don’t give him the satisfaction. Wait for him to cool off before raising the issue with him.

Talk to him about what happens when he loses his temper. Explain why it bothers you and ask him if he’s ready to start trying harder to make the relationship work.

12) He forgets special occasions

Ok, so everyone forgets an important date from time to time. But if it happens more often than not, it’s usually not a good sign.

If he constantly forgets special occasions, you should start asking yourself if he really loves you.

You see, when men forget their partner’s birthday or their anniversary, they’re usually in it for the short term.

If you’re sure that your partner loves you, then there’s really nothing to worry about and his forgetfulness can be explained by the fact that his mind is preoccupied with work or something.

But if your relationship has been going downhill lately and he keeps forgetting important dates, then talk to him about it.

Let him know that remembering special occasions is important to you. Ask him if there’s any reason he’s been withdrawn and forgetful recently and if there’s something you can do to change that.

13) He is always breaking his promises to you

When you make a promise to your partner, you plan to fulfill it – otherwise, it’s meaningless.

So, if your partner keeps making promises that he doesn’t intend to keep – these promises are just empty words.

Unfortunately, if this is something that keeps on happening, it may mean that he doesn’t care enough about you. He may be looking for more from the relationship.

So, is there a way to make him keep his word?

I mentioned this fascinating concept earlier: the hero instinct. When a man’s inner hero is triggered, he’s more likely to care about you and therefore more likely to keep his promises.

Just by knowing the right things to say to him, you’ll open a part of him that no woman has ever reached before.

And the best way to do so is by watching this free video by James Bauer. In it, he’ll reveal simple phrases and texts you can use to make your man truly yours.

Here’s a link to the excellent video again.

14) He doesn’t take you with him to hang out with his friends

If your partner doesn’t want to take you along with him to hang out with his friends, he’s probably not that into you.

If he really loves you, he’ll want you to be part of his life. That means going out with his friends and you – together.

But if he prefers hanging out with his buddies without you, it could mean that he doesn’t see a future with you.

He might actually be using his friends as an excuse to get away from you.

If you want to be sure, ask him to go along with him the next time he goes out with his friends and to see how he reacts.

15) He doesn’t introduce you to his family

Meeting the parents is a pretty big deal. So, if you’ve been dating for a while and haven’t met your partner’s family yet, it could be because he’s not ready for a serious commitment.

Maybe you two aren’t at a stage in your relationship yet where he’s ready to introduce you to his family.

Maybe he’s afraid of introducing you to his parents. He knows that if you meet his parents, then you’ll want to get married soon and start a family together – and that’s something he might not be ready for yet.

If you really want to meet them, assure him that this does not mean you have to get married and have kids tomorrow. You can still take things slowly, you just want to meet the people closest to him because you love him.

16) His language is a dead give-away

The way a guy talks to you can be a big indicator of how he feels about you. If he compliments you a lot and says that you’re beautiful, he’s probably into you.

If he is tender and calls you darling or honey bunny or other pet names, then it’s clear that he loves you.

However, if he’s cold and uses very formal language or if he’s rude to you, then chances are that he doesn’t love you enough.

Ask yourself, is this just how he is with everyone? Maybe he’s just not a great communicator.

But if he’s really nice and polite with other people and has terms of endearment for all the special people in his life except for you, then you should know that something is up.

17) He always has to be right

Some people are stubborn and love to be right. But even they have to admit that they’re wrong from time to time.

It turns out that some people will never admit to being wrong and will in fact aggressively insist that you are the one in the wrong.

If your partner falls into the latter category, and you often find yourself defending the truth against his claims of your lies, then he’s not showing you the love that you deserve – in fact, he’s acting as he would towards his nemesis, not his love partner.

When you love someone then naturally you will respect their opinion and will admit that they are right.

18) He doesn’t say sorry when he’s wrong

It’s true, it’s not always easy to admit you’re wrong. But when you love someone and you make a mistake, you’ll regret it and naturally, you’ll want to make it up to them.

So if your guy doesn’t ever say sorry, it could mean that either he doesn’t think that what he did was wrong, or he doesn’t respect you or care enough about you to admit he wronged you somehow.

The thing is, he’s probably not sorry because he doesn’t think that the relationship is worth fighting for.

To be on the safe side and to avoid putting yourself at risk, you should ask yourself whether or not you really want to make things work with this person.

19) He’s never the one to make up

Have you noticed that whenever you fight, irrespective of whose fault it was, you’re always the one to go to him to make up?

If he doesn’t come to you, it could mean that he doesn’t care enough about the relationship. It could also mean that he’s selfish and wants you to make all the first moves.

When your partner loves you and cares about you, he’ll want to fight for the relationship because he knows that the two of you can work things out. He’ll be motivated by his love for you.

But if your partner does not love or care enough about you, then this isn’t going to be an issue for him because he doesn’t have anything to lose anyway.

Ask yourself: is it worth making up with someone who doesn’t even try to fix his mistakes?

20) He’s always checking out other women

If your partner is always looking around for something better even when he’s with someone as great as you, then his love for you may not last.

The truth is that it’s normal for every man to appreciate the beauty around them and look at other women from time to time.

But if your partner never seems to take his eyes off other women or a specific lady, and if he starts sharing details about her that make you wonder, then it’s possible that he’s keeping his options open.

As long as your partner looks at other women, this is a sign of insecurity and lack of confidence in his relationship.

If you want him to change his behavior and become more secure about the relationship, it’s important that he sees that he has nothing to worry about with you.

Make sure that he knows how much he’s loved as soon as possible.

And another thing, if you want him to stop looking at other women, you have to make him look at you. This means you need to do something to grab his attention.

Maybe buy some nice new clothes or get a new hairdo or something. Maybe even turn the tables on him and make him jealous for a change.

21) He doesn’t want to make plans about the future with you

It’s only natural to think about the future and make plans together when you’re in a loving relationship.

Now, this doesn’t mean that you need to plan out the rest of your lives together, but you’ll probably want to be together on the weekends and holidays.

If your partner doesn’t want to commit to making weekend plans a week or two ahead, then he’s not really interested in spending time with you.

Clearly, he’s not ready for a serious relationship, or he’s not interested in being in one with you. He might still be looking around to see whether or not there are better options out there.

Tell him that if he doesn’t want to make short-term plans with you, then you’ll find someone who will.

22) He never compliments you

If your partner is not willing to compliment you, then you should be worried.

When people have been together for a long time, then they may start to compliment each other less.

But if they still care about each other, they’ll notice when one makes an effort to look good and they’ll compliment them as a show of affection.

If your partner never compliments you, even when you transform like Cinderella before his very eyes, then he obviously doesn’t see you.

23) He never wants to spend time with your family or friends

If your partner is not interested in meeting your family, then he’s not ready for a relationship with you.

When you love someone, it’s only natural that you want to spend some time with the people who matter to them.

If he doesn’t want to spend time with your family, then it means that he does not care enough about you or does not see the relationship lasting long.

Tell him that it would mean a lot to you for him to spend time with the people you love. If he doesn’t want to, then you know that he doesn’t care enough about you.

24) He never has time for you

If he’s always super busy – and procrastinates when it comes to spending time with you – then this could be a problem.

If your partner isn’t there for you, doesn’t give you the attention that you need, and just goes out most of the time, this could be a sign that he is tired of being in the relationship or has fallen out of love with you.

If he has time for everyone with you, then you have to ask yourself, why are you two in a relationship anyway? You can be alone without him.

25) He doesn’t show interest in your life

  • He doesn’t ask you how your day was.
  • He doesn’t care how things are going at work.
  • He’s not interested in your hobbies.
  • He doesn’t even bother to ask you how your medical exam went.

Sound familiar?

If you are with someone who doesn’t show any interest in your life, he is not interested in you as a person and you’ve got to wonder why he’s with you. More than that, ask yourself why you’re with him.

The bottom line

In this article, we’ve looked at 25 signs that he doesn’t love you enough as well as given you advice on what you can do about it.

If this is someone you really love and you desperately want the relationship to work, then you have to get him to love you back even more than you love him.

I touched on the hero instinct earlier – it’s the perfect remedy for the situation you’re facing.


Because once a man’s hero instinct is triggered, he’ll only have eyes for you. You’ll reach a part of him that no woman has ever managed to reach before.

And in return, he’ll be compelled to commit to you and love you like he’s never loved another woman.

So if you’re ready to take that plunge and reach new heights in your relationship, make sure to check out relationship expert James Bauer’s invaluable advice.

Click here to watch the excellent free video.

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

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