Do you think that a married woman is making a move on you? Before you do anything, you need to make sure that your instincts are accurate!
Here are 19 tell-tale signs that a married woman likes you – but she’s hiding it.
1) You’re her favorite
You might not know it, but it’s obvious to your colleagues and friends that you’re her favorite.
You always get preferential treatment. When you ask for this or that, she readily gives it to you.
But when your co-workers ask for it, they have to go through hoops to get their request.
You may think to yourself, no, she doesn’t treat me any different. You see her as somebody who’s extremely good to you at the office.
But if you hear whispers in the pantry about this favoritism, it’s pretty obvious. In this case, it’s possible that your colleagues already know that she likes you – even before you do!
2) She looks after you
It’s nice to have someone look after you.
Who wouldn’t like to be nursed when sick or comforted when down?
The problem, however, is the fact that a married woman does this for you.
It’s not always a motherly tendency. More often than not, it means she likes you.
Remember how your ex-girlfriend took care of you when you had the flu?
If you’re not sure if she indeed likes you, then try to observe the people around you.
Is she as caring towards other male employees?
If she is, does she bend over backward – like the way she does for you?
Yes, she may periodically check up on your co-worker – she’s the boss, after all. But if she drives to your place to bring you some home-cooked soup, she may be looking for something more.
3) She keeps on complimenting you
Being her hands-down favorite, you’re sure to receive a barrage of compliments from your married admirer.
“I like your shoes.”
“I like your ducky tie.”
“I love your new haircut.”
It’s no secret that compliments make us feel good. It’s a way for her to show her appreciation. And why not? Social worker Naomi Berger deems appreciation as “foundational in relationships,” romantic or otherwise.
Although these compliments point to her being a nice person, other people will beg to differ. If the rest of your office hates your ducky tie, then this compliment may be a way for her to butter you up.
4) She thinks you’re hilarious
If a married woman tells you you’re hilarious, it’s one of her compliments – just like those I’ve mentioned above.
This is especially the case if you know for yourself that you’re not funny.
This preference for hilarity is backed up by research. Scientists found that a woman who frequently laughs at a man’s joke is more open to dating him.
So even if you’re not trying to be hilarious, a married woman who likes you will chuckle at everything you say.
5) She’s interested in your love life
If a married woman keeps on probing about your life – especially your relationships – then it’s a sign she likes you.
When you like somebody, you’d want to know everything about him.
It’s more than mere curiosity, though.
According to Psychologist Dr. Noam Shpancer, it’s all about learning about your competition.
This lady, after all, is gunning to be your mate. She wants to know how she measures up with any girl you fancy.
6) She criticizes her competition
A married woman who likes you will try to get your attention. And if she sees you eyeing another lady, you best be ready for the criticism that comes after it.
Going back to Dr. Shpancer’s article, this attitude can be traced back to the evolutionary theory. Whereas men dispel competition by criticizing the other guy’s physicality and financial state, women tend to go after their competition’s appearance and character.
So if this married woman has nothing but bad things to say about every girl you date, you shouldn’t listen to her right away. She’s probably trying to lead you away from your lady friend.
7) She keeps on joking that she likes you
Jokes are half-meant, so they say. There’s a grain of truth in every joke.
And if she jokes about liking you, it’s probably a sign that she does.
It’s a widely-held belief amongst psychologists, including the distinguished Sigmund Freud. He even likened jokes to truths wrapped in smiles.
In his article, author William Berry explained how Freud linked jokes to two purposes. One is aggression or sarcasm, and the other one is to expose an unconscious desire. As for you, it’s the latter.
It may also be her passive-aggressive way to let you know she likes you. You may be oblivious to this, so she’s trying to tell you – albeit in an indirect way.
8) She’s mum about her marriage
There’s no doubt that she talks to you a lot. But in all those instances, you’ve never heard once about her husband.
Should you begin to ask, she answers little about it – if any at all.
Instead, she proceeds to do what she usually does. She’ll compliment you or ask about your love life. She’ll even go as far as criticizing the girl you’ve been seeing.
It’s obvious why she does this. She wants to make it seem like she’s available, even though she’s not. Who knows? You might give in to her charms sooner or later (you shouldn’t, though.)
9) She speaks ‘different’ towards you
When she talks with your officemates, she has this stern, commanding voice. But when she talks to you, she reverts to this sexy baby voice.
An article described this surprising tone as a ‘mix of high pitch, vocal fry, and up to talk.’
As to why women do this in front of the men they like, Confidence Coach Victoria Browne has this explanation:
“When it’s done to a baby, the maternal side of a woman is trying to make a connection.”
Additionally, she says that it’s a way to “consciously or subconsciously come across as vulnerable, (in need of) taking care of by the man.”
Psychotherapist Yuko Nippoda echoes the same thoughts.
“He projects his image in her voice as she thinks (probably subconsciously) that this will make the man feel he wants to protect her.”
In summation, Professor Sarah Niblock describes this tone change as a way to “use our voices in such a way as to invite attention.”
As you see, a change in intonation is a sign that this married woman wants you to take care of her – probably in a romantic way.
10) She often tries to sneak a conversation with you
You talk to her liberally, and why not? You need to; you work together.
But if she often tries to go beyond the bounds of professional communication – it’s a sign that she probably likes you.
Think about this: she doesn’t need to follow up on a specific project because:
- it’s due next month, and
- it’s the weekend.
Even so, she uses this project as a topic as an excuse to talk to you.
Apart from starting an unnecessary conversation, a married woman will often do this during the ungodly hours. If she keeps on ‘following up’ every past midnight – it’s evident that she’s sneaking behind her husband’s back.
11) She’s always staring at you
We’re all guilty of this. We tend to stare at the people we like. In other words, we like to check them out.
While staring is a physiological sign that we like somebody, it may imply so much more.
According to a Psychology Today article, eye contact may indicate arousal.
Although staring can cause discomfort in some people, some interpret this stare as a ‘come hither’ look.
If you can, try to take a glimpse of her pupils. If they are dilated, it’s another sign that she likes you.
12) She gets awkward around you
It’s not just men who get peculiar around the girl they like. Women do, too – married or otherwise!
She’s so desperate to make a good impression that she ends up conscious and clumsier than usual.
Here are some awkward things that she might end up doing whenever you’re around:
- She combines words. For example, she wants to say Hi and Hello – but ends up uttering “Hilo” instead.
- She’s unusually clumsy and drops her things on the floor.
- She’s so unsure of what to do that she ends up doing random things like stroking her keychain.
- She tries to like the same things you like.
- She accidentally reveals that she knows more (than what you told her) about you.
13) She can’t help but blush around you
If a married woman can’t help but blush whenever you two interact, it’s another sign that she likes you.
Blushing, for one, is a sign of self-consciousness – just like the awkward things I’ve mentioned above. When it happens on the cheeks, it’s the body’s response to a social threat.
Physically, blushing happens because of an adrenaline rush. The hormones affect the nervous system, which in turn causes the vessels in the skin to widen.
While blushing often occurs on the cheeks, it can occur at any part of the body as well – especially one that’s been getting a lot of attention.
For experts, blushing is one of the best ways to tell if somebody likes you. It’s an honest response of the body.
Unlike many of the signs here, she can’t do anything to hide it – even if she tries to cover her face.
14) She flirts with you
Flirting is a sign as clear as day – this married woman likes you.
Psychologically, flirting is a way to show attraction and gain a partner. It’s also exploratory in nature, meaning it’s a way for her to gauge if you like her back.
For some, flirting is a way to boost some self-esteem and have fun. Others view it as a means to motivate someone else to perform a task.
So how do you know if she’s doing some romantic flirting?
According to an article by psychologist Dr. Theresa DiDonato, you need to do the following:
- Listen for verbal evidence. If she’s using sexual innuendos, it’s a sign she’s interested.
- Check her body language, such as smiling, leaning forward, and making eye contact—more about this other sign below.
- Take the context into consideration. Is she doing it in a place that’s related to flirting, such as a bar?
- Look into her flirting behavior. Not all flirts are the same. Some are:
- Traditional, who is cautious and polite
- Physical, who use a lot of flashy body movements
- Playful or extroverts, who could be sincere (or insincere) about their flirting depending on the scenario
15) Her body language says so
Although she might not be showing the signs above, there’s one thing that will tell you a lot: her body language.
Here are the mannerisms you can expect from a married woman who likes you.
- She licks her lips or pushes/touches her neck to flaunt her face.
- She leans in and tilts her head when she talks to you – both of which are signs of interest.
- She stands taller, apart from pulling her stomach in and her shoulders back. It’s one of her ways to impress you.
- She wiggles her hips whenever she walks towards or near you. She’s like a peacock showing features (her curves in this case) to ‘attract’ a mate – you.
- Her body and/or feet are pointed towards you.
16) She wants to get physical – just like Olivia Newton-John
Yes, it’s an old song – but you get the drift.
Just like men, women like to get ‘physical’ with the men they want. But since her marital status stops her from going all out, she’ll do it the subtlest way she can.
For example, she’ll try to tap and caress your shoulder for a ‘job well done.’
She’ll try to hold your hand and pass it off as a mannerism she does when talking.
If you want to be 100% sure of this sign, try to observe how she interacts with other men. Does she caress or touch the other guys the way she does to you? If not, then it’s plain to see – she fancies you a lot.
17) She’s a tease
Apart from flirting, a married woman who likes you will try to tease you. She’ll hint at the possibility of a romance, then withdraw it. She has a husband, after all!
It doesn’t help that women do this more often. According to one report, 64% of women tease, compared to just 43% of men.
Compared to flirting – where there’s a sincere intent – teasing is more of a fake show. Instead, she’ll use her beauty and appeal to put you under her spell.
Why she teases you is obvious: she likes you, and she wants you to like her. She wants to see how much you’ll yearn for her.
On the other hand, it could be her way of establishing control – a chance to become desirable again. Maybe her husband is not doing enough to make her feel as attractive as before.
Should you be unlucky enough to fall for her charm, you’ll end up confused, frustrated, even embarrassed. You need to be wary of this type of married woman, as you’ll only end up on the losing side.
18) She’s down for some sexy talk
You’d think that a married woman would talk properly around a guy she likes. Her husband might find out, after all.
That’s not always the case.
Some ladies are so driven that they won’t shy away from the sexy talk. More often than not, they’re the initiators of such conversations.
You’re talking about deadlines, then suddenly, she shifts the discussion towards the kinkiest thing she has done.
Obviously, talking dirty is one of her ways to turn you on.
It’s also a slip of the tongue, although it seems to be intentional in this case. She’s saying these things because it’s what she’s thinking!
19) She wants to be alone with you
Picture this: your married female co-worker came up to you to invite you to dinner. Of course, you ask: “Who else is coming?”
She answers, “Just us.”
You ask: “Does your husband know?”
She doesn’t say anything.
It couldn’t be any clearer. All she wants is the two of you for dinner.
And no, her husband doesn’t know about it.
Wanting to be alone with you – is one of the boldest moves a married woman could ever make.
While they’re not limited from going out with friends, heading out with you – and only you – signifies that she wants something more.
In a nutshell
As you can see, there are 19 signs that say that a married woman likes you.
You can see it in the way she talks. She uses a different tone, and she keeps on complimenting you.
It’s also apparent in her actions. She blushes or acts awkwardly around you.
Then there are the more obvious signs. She likes flirting and teasing you. She’s not hiding the fact that she wants to have some alone time with you.
So what now?
Sit back, relax, and take a breather. You wouldn’t want to make a wrong decision and suffer from the consequences of having an affair.
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