She sends you an “I miss you” text.
But when you meet each other in person, she wouldn’t even look at you. She just ignores you as if you mean nothing to her.
What’s going through her mind and why is she doing this exactly?
In this article, I will give you 11 tips in dealing with a girl who says she misses you but then ignores you.
1) First of all—did she really ignore you?
This seems like a no-brainer but some people misinterpret things and misread body language.
Let’s rewind. What was the scenario like when she “ignored” you?
Were you with other people? Maybe she didn’t approach you because she’s shy or she doesn’t want others to know you have a thing.
Was she busy? Maybe she didn’t even see you!
The only time I am sure that a person is ignoring me is when they acknowledge that they’re aware of my presence and yet they deliberately act like I don’t exist.
It’s when you say hello to them, they look at you, but then they don’t give a reaction.
It’s when you bump into each other, they look at you, but they won’t even smile.
You get my drift. It has to be really obvious that she’s ignoring you. Otherwise, give her the benefit of the doubt. She’s probably too shy, too busy, or her eyesight may be failing. Who knows!
For now, it’s better not to make a big deal out of it, especially if it happened only once.
2) Don’t assume she’s just plain evil
It’s normal to get into panic mode when a girl ignores you after saying cute things to you.
I mean hey, you’re not naive. You’ve witnessed many girls toy with men’s feelings, and you don’t want to be one of their victims.
But it’s not helping you to think this way. Protecting your heart too much to the point that you become judgmental and impulsive will not help you win the girl.
Look, I know it seems like it, but there are so many reasons why a girl might say she misses you but ignores you in real life. And most of them are not as evil as you might think.
Here are some possible reasons why she does it:
- Her heart and head are in conflict.
- She wants you to make the first move.
- She’s painfully shy.
- She’s scared you don’t like her the same way.
- She’s in a rush or she didn’t even see you!
If it’s her first time to “ignore” you, calm down. Don’t attack her or give her the cold shoulder. Don’t give her “a taste of her own medicine.”
In other words, don’t let your anxious heart ruin the first stages of your love.
3) Use body language to lure her in
Let’s say she really did ignore you. Well then, there’s nothing much we can do about that, is there?
However, you can definitely do something that can turn things around when you meet again.
The next time you bump into each other, show her that you’re clearly interested in her—that you still remember what she said (that she misses you).
Body language is powerful, but especially when you’re trying to win the heart of a woman.
You see, women are used to reading men. They are very sensitive when it comes to a guy’s body language.
If you want to communicate to her that you want her, then you gotta learn some tricks.
To start, check out some of the basic body language signals that women look for in men when they’re trying to gauge your interest.
Kate’s a relationship expert who helped me improve my dating life tremendously. For a long time, I thought that in order to catch a girl’s interest, all I needed to do was look good and say the right things. What was missing in the equation was having the right body language around women.
When I learned her tricks, BAM! Dating has become a piece of cake.
I suggest you master your body language if you want to get the girl—or many girls, for that matter. And you can do it with Kate’s guidance.
4) Analyze how you reacted when she said “I miss you”
Scroll back to your convo when she said she misses you. Maybe you’ll find the clue why she’s ignoring you all of a sudden.
Did you say you miss her too or did you just put a smiley emoji and moved on to another topic? Or worse, did you laugh?
Or…did you overdo it by saying you’ve been waiting for her to say those words all this time?
Maybe your reaction wasn’t something she expected and so she felt awkward when you met each other. It’s probably because she wanted more from you—that you’ll actually be the first one to say hi— or maybe it’s because she feels awkward that you’re putting too much weight on her “I miss you” when it’s just supposed to be friendly.
5) Think of the context of her “I miss you.”
This is closely related to #3.
When it comes to communication, context is everything.
Context is already challenging to figure out in real life, but it can be a pain in the foot if you try to read it through text.
But we should try.
What did you talk about when she blurted out that she misses you? Was your conversation more serious or just playful and friendly?
Did she say it after you haven’t seen each other for a while, or did she say it after you hung out?
Most of all, is she the type who says “I miss you” to almost everyone as if it’s just no big deal?
Try to figure out the meaning of her “I miss you” so you can analyze why she’s ignoring you. This will help you assess her actions better.
6) Be the first one to reach out
Most girls want you to make the first move…and maybe she’s no exception. I mean, who doesn’t want that, really?
After all, she’s the one who already said she misses you. In her mind, the ball should now be in your hands. She already did her part!
But you might wonder why what she said was such a big move.
Well, some girls are painfully shy. It probably took her a lot of courage to say “I miss you” and now that she finally blurted them out, she doesn’t want to be the first one to sit with you or give you a warm hug.
She wants to be the one being pursued this time around.
So…did you even wave a big hello? Did you give her a warm hug? Did you flash a big smile?
Yes, it has to be a little over-the-top. A simple smile you give to a stranger would be kinda insulting for her because again—ahem hem—she already made a big move!
She’s taken over by her pride but I hope you still find it cute. Go ahead and show her you miss her, too.
7) Assess if she’s actually just playing with you
I’ve been preaching about how you should be more understanding towards her but hey, you also have to protect yourself.
Date with both eyes open.
But make sure you don’t assess the situation with a bruised ego. You’ll never see things clearly this way.
Instead, sit down in a quiet place and analyze her actions and who she is, as objectively as you can. Throw your emotions and judgments out of the window.
She’s probably playing with you if:
- If she’s done this more than once.
- If she has a reputation of being a player.
- If she blows hot and cold.
- If she’s narcissistic.
- If you have a feeling she’s out to hurt you.
But of course, it’s hard to have proper judgment of another person. We’re not psychologists, after all.
But I have an alternative for you: Get expert guidance from a relationship coach over at Relationship Hero.
It’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
I tried them once when I was struggling like crazy with an ex and they gave me psychology-backed techniques to win her heart again. And of course, I got her back. In fact, we’re stronger now than ever.
The few bucks I spent for expert advice was definitely worth it.
You see, we only have very limited experience when it comes to love and women. A relationship coach, on the other hand, has a psychology degree and they know the ropes of dating.
Seriously, why do this alone when you can get proper guidance?
8) Don’t take it personally
As much as you can, don’t make it about you.
Don’t be insulted by it, don’t feel sorry for yourself.
First, you have to ask yourself if she actually rejected you or not.
And if your gut tells you that she did, well then…that’s just how she is. She’s the one with bad behavior.
It’s not because of you. You’re not undeserving or worthless. You’re not as assh*le because you didn’t do anything wrong.
Her ignoring you is well…her problem.
She’s probably just shy or awkward so you should be compassionate towards her, too.
But just to say, don’t feel that you should look in the mirror and assess what’s wrong with you because a girl just ignored you.
Chances are, you’re a 100% fine lad and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you. So don’t feel bad. You’re absolutely fine.
9) Make her fall for you
Look, she said she misses you, but she didn’t say she’s in love with you or even that she likes you.
“I miss you” is just wholesome.
Sure, she probably likes you but she doesn’t like you enough to admit she likes you. NOT YET, at least
So the goal is to make her fall for you. That way it would be almost impossible for her to ignore you.
How do you do it effortlessly?
I told you about the importance of body language when it comes to winning a woman’s heart. Women find certain body signals completely irresistible, and you should know how to use this to your advantage.
I learned all of this from Kate Spring. It’s great when it’s a woman who teaches men how to seduce women. She has a better perspective on it and I guarantee you, she doesn’t give cringe-inducing moves like bicep flex or lip biting.
In this excellent free video, Kate shares some valuable techniques to make women fall head over heels in love with you.
Kate’s considered a best-selling author whose goal is to help men seduce better (and by that, I mean “effortlessly”).
10) Go solo more often
No matter how much you master body language, if you’re always around people, she’ll find you intimidating. She has to gain the courage to approach you.
In fact, even if you’re the one approaching her or giving a smile if you’re still around people, she won’t feel comfortable reciprocating your advances. There’s even a chance she won’t be able to catch your signals because she’s too self-conscious.
She’s probably worried that you and your friends are talking about her…especially because she just told you she misses you!
Be alone when you know you’re going to bump into her.
That way, all the body language you’ll throw her way will reach her, and she won’t be too shy to respond.
If it’s almost impossible for you to detach from your group, find a way!
Excuse yourself for a little bit and be alone in a corner. You can even pretend to be checking your phone or waiting for someone if you have to. Then smile at her from that corner.
And when she smiles back, approach her.
Look, she already sent the “I miss you” text, this shouldn’t be too hard for you.
11) Send her a message
The best way to deal with these types of problems is by confronting them.
When she “ignored” you, text her “Hey, you didn’t say hi:-(“ or “Hey, I’m not sure if you saw me…but I waved at you!”
By telling her straight that you’re aware she’s ignoring, this will release the tension and open up some room for honest conversation.
She might reply “I know, I got so shy!” and your problem is solved.
Its’ great because it saves both of you time. No more analyzing or overthinking why she ignored you. You heard it hot and fresh from her.
Life and dating is easier when you can just be more candid and transparent.
Now if she continues to ignore you even through text (let’s say she put you on read), then you know something’s definitely not right.
You might want to talk things over in person.
Oh yes, you can demand it. It’s your right. After all, she already told you she misses you. That means you’re close enough that you can ask for an explanation when something like this happens.
When a girl you like tells you she misses you, it can be exhilarating. But when she ignores you, it can be totally gut-wrenching.
A part of you would suspect that she’s just playing with your feelings—that she’s just trying to make you fall for her with her words, then leave you high and dry.
You’re stressing too much
It’s probably not her intention to ignore you.
In fact, I believe the majority of women are just shy and so they want men to approach them first. You see, for most of them, it would feel like death when they get rejected by someone they like…especially if they already revealed their true feelings, even with just a simple “I miss you.”
To help her gain the confidence to approach you first, again— practice Kate Spring’s body language techniques. I can’t recommend her enough.
When you do her techniques the right way, it’s impossible for the girl to ignore you ever again, even if she’s the shyest person in the world.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.