When it comes to guys and texting, things can get confusing.
You send a cute message and he takes forever to respond.
Or you send him an image with a hilarious caption and he takes even longer to answer.
Why is he taking so long?
What does it mean when he takes forever to text back?
Does he not like you?
Is he ignoring you?
Does he hate texting or are his fingers just too fat to type quickly?
These are types of fears every girl has when it comes to dating guys or anyone new for that matter.
Fear of being ignored is an extremely common one among women because we tend to be much more sensitive than men.
However, there are many reasons why a guy might take so long to text back – and most of them aren’t as sinister as we may think.
Here are some reasons why your guy might take forever to respond, along with tips on how you can avoid making him feel like you’re stalking him!
1. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because He’s Busy
Guys are busy just like us women, but they tend to be more immune to text-mania.
Like girls send them two or three texts in a row while they say they’re busy with something else.
But when they do respond, it’s usually with a one-word answer.
Guys will say things like “sorry, busy” or something to that effect.
It could be that he’s in the middle of a group of friends, so it may take him longer to respond because he’s having a good time and wants to be social.
Men often don’t mind waiting until later to respond.
So how can you handle it?
If you’re dissatisfied with his lack of responses, don’t nag him or get upset.
In the end, you want a guy that is busy and doing something, right?
You won’t want a guy to be desperate over text.
Whether he is being social, or whether he is working hard, it’s important that your man has things going on in his life.
You don’t want him being needy and clingy and messaging you every hour of the day.
You and I both know that a clingy man is not an attractive man.
Try to have some patience and assume he might be busy.
The next time you text him, give it a couple of hours.
Don’t try to send another message right away or at least not until the following day.
2. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because He’s Afraid to Seem Too Desperate or Needy
Guys get the same butterflies and excitement that we do, but they’re less likely to show it.
They don’t want to come off as too eager, needy, or desperate and that holds them back from responding – even though they really want to.
Moreover, if he did text you all the time, it might come off as overbearing and even scare you off.
So this is why some guys take time to text as they are wary about appearing needy and uncool.
So how do you handle it?
And remember: guys hate being needy or desperate, just like we do.
They will text you as long as they feel that they have something to offer you that is worth your time, but it may not be a quick response.
So don’t push too hard on responding.
If he does happen to text you and seems like he’s got something to say, be gentle with him.
The truth is, if this guy is trying to appear cool by taking the time to text you, then he obviously likes you, so there is no need to worry.
3. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because You Didn’t Follow the Three-Day Rule
Guys freak out if they don’t hear from you in a couple of days.
They become nervous that you might be mad at them or not interested anymore.
So if you haven’t texted him in 3 days, then when you finally do, you can guarantee he is going to make sure he takes time to respond to you.
He doesn’t want to seem like a chump that replies immediately to a girl that is clearly not interested in him.
This rule is especially important if you’ve been texting a guy you just started dating and want to keep it casual.
If a guy has been trying to contact you for a few days and hasn’t heard back, he’s going to assume he’s being blown off. Hence why he takes forever to text back!
How to Handle It: Don’t let it get to three days without contacting him first.
4. He Takes Forever to Respond Because You Didn’t Trigger His Hero Instinct
Perhaps he is not focused on responding to him because you haven’t triggered his protective instincts to want and care for you.
You see, there’s a new theory in the relationship world that’s causing quite a stir – it’s called the hero instinct.
Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept finally explains how men really think and feel in relationships.
And it’s something most women have never even heard of.
According to James Bauer, men don’t actually need a lot to feel content in their relationships. In fact, what they need has nothing to do with sex.
Men have certain innate drivers. And when a woman comes along and triggers them, it causes a powerful response. The result is a man who loves harder, commits wholeheartedly, and truly dedicates himself to the relationship.
So, how can you trigger your man’s hero instinct?
The easiest thing to do is to watch this simple and genuine video by James Bauer.
The truth is, once you understand how the hero instinct works, there’s no telling what heights your relationship can reach.
So if you want to give your man what he truly wants from you, make sure to check out James Bauer’s excellent video. In it, he reveals the exact texts and phrases you can use straight away.
5. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because He’s Keeping His Options Open
Guys don’t like being clingy, but they do enjoy knowing that they have a girl as another option.
They don’t want to get tied down with you unless you want that too.
So if he doesn’t text back for a couple of days, it might be because he has a few girls on the go and he is keeping you as an option.
He is not fully committed to you so he doesn’t respond back immediately.
He might be trying to make sure he doesn’t miss out on another girl.
In this situation, it’s important not to get too anxious or upset. Instead, you might want to try texting him first.
This will help establish you as the initiator and let him know that you’re interested in him.
But if you don’t want to be too straightforward, then it’s okay to text him once in a while and see what he does.
Keep it casual. This guy isn’t ready for a serious relationship as he is playing the field.
If you really want him as a boyfriend, then you might need to set up a face-to-face date with him so you can get to know him more and also let him know that you’re looking for a serious relationship.
Also, if you ask him out on a date, and he never seems to have time in his schedule to meet up with you, then that might be an indicator that he is dating others girls.
Why else would he be busy every night of the week?
And if he does meet up with you, then great! He might be ready to settle down with someone. You never know!
But if he just wants to play the field, and you don’t want to be with a player, then at least you can be honest with each other and you can decide that this just isn’t for you.
Take action in these situations. You don’t want this guy playing you while he plays with other girls. You deserve better.
Trust me, I’ve been there before. I know how it hurts. I was casually dating a guy that was dating other girls at the same time. At that time, I was okay with it, but I ended up getting heartbroken because I developed feelings. So now I’m warning you.
It’s not worth it to date a player. It’s better to have no boyfriend at all than to have feelings for someone who is playing the field and may never be interested in you.
This may not be the case with this guy that takes time to text you back, but it’s certainly one of the possibilities.
6. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because Texting Is Not The Only Way Of Communication
Guys love to talk with girls through text, but they also enjoy talking in other ways.
They enjoy hearing your voice and might prefer talking on the phone.
They might not want to be bothered with texting back when they could just call you instead.
So how you can handle it?
Be accepting of the fact that texting isn’t his only form of communication and don’t expect him to text you all the time.
Instead, you can try calling, emailing or leaving a voicemail if you want to get in contact to figure out which he likes most.
Or you can even try meeting up with him in person.
7. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because He Did Not Understand What You Meant
Texting is a very hard medium to interpret.
Many people don’t read the text properly and misinterpret it.
Usually, guys will get confused if a girl uses cute emoticons that don’t really give any indication of what she means, and even if they read it correctly, they don’t realize what the girl means by showing her in-text smiley face or whatever.
It happens to me all the time. I love using gifs, emoticons, and plain goofy images to express how I feel, but sometimes people just don’t get it!
Or they can even misinterpret your message to mean something completely opposite from what you meant.
As a result, guys will take forever to text back because they’re confused and don’t know how to reply.
So if you’re a girl who likes using cute emoticons, then no worries!
Just use words to describe how you feel and what you want to say.
Also, don’t be afraid of using the word “I miss you” or “I am interested in you.”
While this might sound bold, it will get the point across and make things clear.
That way, the boy knows what you’re thinking and won’t take forever to text back because he doesn’t know how you feel.
8. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because Of His Past Traumas
Everyone has experienced some kind of heartbreak that made them more cautious when it came to talking to new people.
But what happens if the guy you like has had a lot of heartbreaks and trauma in his past.
Then he’ll take longer to respond as a result of his paranoia and insecurity weighing down on him.
If this is the case, then it’s going to be a much slower process.
He might even want to warm up to you slowly over the span of several weeks.
Give him time and understanding, but also try to push him gently in the right direction.
How you can handle it:
It’s important that you are patient, compassionate, and understanding with your guy if he has been hurt in the past.
Build rapport and connection with him, and eventually, he will trust you.
I mentioned this fascinating concept earlier: the hero instinct. When a man’s inner hero is triggered, he’s more likely to overcome his insecurities and fully commit to you.
Just by knowing the right things to say to him, you’ll open a part of him that no woman has ever reached before.
And the best way to do so is by watching this free video by James Bauer. In it, he’ll reveal simple phrases and texts you can use to make your man truly yours.
9. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because He Is Already In A Relationship
It is always possible that the guy you like is already in a relationship and taking forever to text back because he is not interested in anyone else.
He might be happily committed and genuinely focused on his relationship.
If this is the case, then move on with your life and find a guy who is open and available to you. You don’t want a guy that is thinking of another woman.
Don’t let yourself get wrapped up in the emotional drama and try to force him into becoming something he isn’t.
Even if he is interested in you, he’s not going to risk his relationship for the possibility of a new affair.
That’s not all, dating a guy who is already taken can cause you a world of trouble.
How To Handle It: Whatever you do, don’t go on a date with him until you know for sure he’s single.
There is nothing wrong with being prematurely optimistic but you really want to be 100% certain that he isn’t already in a relationship with another girl.
One way you can find out is by looking him up on Facebook or Instagram. See if you can find a social profile, and see if he has many photos with a particular girl. If he does, then he might be taken.
10. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because He Is Away
If a guy has gone away on a trip or holiday with friends, it’s very likely that he’s not going to be texting you.
This is because he is away on vacation and doesn’t have time to text or spend time with you in person.
He’ll be too busy having fun with his friends and enjoying the trip with them.
Here’s how you should handle it:
If he is not going to be away for a long time, then don’t worry about it.
He will text back when he gets back from his holiday.
But if he is gone for more than a week or so, then you can try getting in touch with him again and asking him how he is going on his holiday. Don’t get down if he is not quick to reply. He will take his time but if he likes you, you can be sure he will eventually respond.
11. He Takes Forever to Text Back Because He Is Just Not Into You
This is probably the most accurate reason why guys take forever to text back and it really stinks.
Ultimately, if a guy doesn’t like you and doesn’t have any real interest in getting to know you, he isn’t going to respond… ever.
Once this seems likely to be a possibility, you might want to just let go.
There has been nothing more devastating than waiting by the phone or refreshing your inbox repeatedly only to realize that you are not wanted.
There is still a ton of fish in the sea, so don’t waste any more time on him!
But if you really want this guy, and you can’t seem to get him out of your mind, then you need to awaken his most protective instincts.
I touched on the hero instinct earlier – it’s the perfect remedy for the situation you’re facing.
Because once a man’s hero instinct is triggered, he’ll only have eyes for you. You’ll reach a part of him that no woman has ever managed to reach before.
And in return, he’ll be compelled to commit to you and love you like he’s never loved another woman.
So if you’re ready to take that plunge and reach new heights in your relationship, make sure to check out relationship expert James Bauer’s invaluable advice.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.