12 tips to deal with your friend who’s too friendly with your husband

We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. Read our affiliate disclosure.


It’s natural to become suspicious when your friend starts spending more time with your husband than with you.

You may be worried that there is more to the friendship than meets the eye.

How can you trust your instincts without coming across as paranoid?

This is a difficult situation, but I will give you some tips on what to do if your friend is too friendly with your husband:

1) Be honest with your husband

If you feel like there’s something suspicious going on, talk to your husband.

Be honest and tell him how you feel. The last thing you want to do is push him away and make your suspicions worse by not talking about it.

If there is nothing going on, he will be thankful that you told him.

But more importantly, it will let him know how protective you are of your relationship with him.

If, however, he was doing something wrong, this is the best way for you to get all the information you need to make the best decision for your family.

You see, communication is the key in any relationship, even if it’s about something like this.

I know, you might not feel comfortable talking about this with him, but trust me – it is better to talk it out than to assume things and never actually learn the truth!

Think about it: if there is nothing going on, you could spare yourself a lot of heartache by simply talking to him.

2) Set clear boundaries for how you want to be treated

If you feel like your friend is coming on too strong with your husband, set clear boundaries for how you want to be treated.

Let your friend know that you don’t appreciate when she constantly flirts with your husband or makes him uncomfortable.

This is a way of telling her that you are watching her behavior carefully.

At the same time, don’t let her know that you are distrusting of her just yet. Try to be a bit subtler about it.

You see, your boundaries can also be set with your husband. You can tell him that the behavior is making you feel uncomfortable, and you want him to set boundaries with her.

This will let him know that you are on his side, even if you are not completely trusting of her yet.

Boundaries are important and should be stuck to.

If your husband loves you, he will have no problem adjusting to your boundaries, especially if it will make you feel safe.

3) Don’t make assumptions about her behavior right away

It’s easy to jump to conclusions and assume that your friend is up to no good, but you don’t know what’s in her head.

You don’t know what her intentions are. It is possible that your friend is just being overly friendly, and she is doing this because she is interested in your husband.

She may genuinely think that he is charming and attractive. But she might also not have any malicious intentions when it comes to him and her behavior might be innocent!

You never know!

Again, you don’t know what is going on in her head.

That’s why it’s important to not make any assumptions about her behavior right away.

If you do, you could destroy a friendship over practically nothing, so maybe try to evaluate the situation first.

4) Ask a relationship coach for advice

While this article will shed light on the main things you can do when your friend flirts with your husband, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.

With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice tailored to your unique situation…

Relationship Hero is a popular site where highly trained relationship coaches help people work through complex relationship issues, like flirting and infidelity.

Their popularity boils down to how skilled their coaches are.

Why am I so confident that they can help you?

Well, after recently experiencing a tough patch in my own relationship, I reached out to them for help.

From the moment I got in touch, I was given genuine, helpful advice, and was finally able to see my relationship issues with real clarity.

I was blown away by how kind and empathetic my coach was.

Within minutes, you could be receiving life-changing advice on how to navigate and repair the issues you’re facing in your relationship.

Click here to get started.

5) Watch out for red flags

If your friend has been coming on too strong with your husband for a while now, you may want to look for red flags in her behavior.

There are a few warning signs that your friend may have bad intentions behind her actions.

For example, your friend may be overly suggestive in her behavior or she may be trying to push you out of your husband’s life.

Or maybe she is being extremely touchy or flirty with your husband.

If you notice any of these red flags, it’s important that you start keeping track of your friend’s behavior.

Start documenting things, but do it in a subtle way. For example, if your friend keeps trying to get your husband alone at social events, make a mental note of it.

If these red flags persist, that is your sign to either end the friendship, have a talk with your husband, or figure something else out. You need to know that you are completely right to be angry and hurt.

6) Pay attention to your gut feeling

If you feel like your friend is too friendly with your husband, take note of how you feel. Pay attention to what’s going on inside of you.

Are you jealous of her behavior? Are you feeling anxious when you see the two of them together?

Keep track of your feelings and emotions and use them to help you make the right decision. If something doesn’t sit right with you, take note of that feeling.

You see, women have an excellent gut feeling.

Their intuition is telling them that their friend is a bad person, but they choose not to listen.

Instead, they ignore their gut feeling and end up in a terrible situation.

Now: if your intuition is telling you that something fishy is going on, listen to it.

You are rarely wrong.

However, make sure that what you are listening to is actually your intuition, and not just jealousy or insecurity.

How can you listen to your intuition a bit more?

Well, it’s not so difficult, simply spend more time listening to your inner voice. Whenever you make a decision, listen intently to what your gut is trying to tell you.

7) Figure out how to mend the marriage

If nothing you’ve tried has improved the situation with your spouse, you may need some external guidance to help get things back on track.

Mend the Marriage, created by relationship expert Brad Browning, is a course that has helped thousands of married couples reconcile their differences.

In this free video, you’ll learn some of the biggest marriage mistakes people make without realizing it.

And crucially – you’ll pick up some excellent tips on how to rectify things with your partner.

So rather than let things run their course and potentially lead to divorce, take back control and decide the outcome of your love life.

The great thing about Brad’s advice is that you can use it even if your spouse isn’t as enthusiastic about repairing your marriage as you are.

All you have to do is check out this quick video.

It could be the difference between growing old together or calling it quits ahead of time.

8) Don’t feel guilty about being protective of your relationship

If you feel like you need to protect your husband from your friend, don’t feel guilty about it. You are allowed to be protective of your relationship with your husband and it is okay to want to keep your friend at arm’s length.

Don’t beat yourself up for it because you are entitled to feel this way.

You don’t need to feel guilty about it: you can be protective of your relationship without being paranoid about your friend.

Do your best to stay calm and in control of your emotions.

You don’t want to make this worse by letting your emotions take over. If you feel like you need to spend less time with your friend, do it.

However, you are not crazy for wanting to take action when your friend is making you feel threatened about your relationship.

You see, your relationship is something you want to protect, and there is nothing wrong with that!

9) Discourage the behavior you don’t want to see

If you want to discourage your friend from coming on too strong with your husband, try to discourage that behavior.

Don’t get into an argument with your friend about it. Instead, try to gently discourage that behavior.

At the same time, don’t make a scene about it, or it may be turned against you.

Keep a friendly distance between the two of you.

Let your friend know that you don’t appreciate when she flirts with your husband or makes him uncomfortable.

Now: also talk to your husband and tell him that you don’t want him to engage in this kind of behavior with her, either.

It always takes two people for flirting to work, so he needs to play his part, too.

10) Don’t let yourself be disrespected

If you feel like your friend is disrespecting your relationship with your husband, you have every right to say something.

Don’t let yourself be disrespected by your friend or your husband.

If you feel like you need to put a stop to her behavior, do it.

At the same time, keep in mind that you don’t want to come off as being too aggressive or intense.

How can you be assertive without coming across as aggressive or confrontational? Here are a few tips:

  • Stay calm and collected.
  • Don’t get too emotional. –
  • Be direct.
  • Be upfront and let your friend know how you feel.
  • Don’t let the situation escalate.
  • Stay in control of your emotions.
  • Let the friendship play out naturally.
  • Don’t rush things.

However, if you notice that your husband is engaging with her flirting, then it might be time to rethink your marriage.

If you can’t trust him to stay faithful, how will you spend your life with him?

Definitely have a serious talk with him about what is going on!

11) Stay calm

It’s easy to turn your friendship into a competition when your friend starts spending more time with your husband than with you.

When you feel like you are losing your husband’s attention to your friend, it’s easy to get upset and start acting out.

This can lead to a situation where you both start ignoring each other and the friendship ends up getting shut down.

Keep calm and stay focused on your friendship with your friend.

Stay focused on the good times you are having together and don’t let your feelings of jealousy seep into the friendship.

This can help you avoid ending the friendship prematurely. At the same time, keep track of how her friendship with your husband is progressing.

You see, when you act out it will be a lot harder to have a clear picture of what is actually going on with her and your husband.

Instead, focus on being calm and simply observe the situation.

Do not make any judgments about your friend’s behavior, but just observe and take things as they come.

If you have enough proof that they are doing things that aren’t okay, that’s when you can still decide to talk to them about it.

12) If you don’t trust her, spend less time with her

If your friendship with your friend is getting more and more strained as she spends more time with your husband, don’t force it.

If you don’t trust her, spend less time with her.

At the same time, don’t cut her out of your life completely.

You don’t want to end your friendship with her just yet. Keep track of her behavior and keep your husband updated on what’s going on with your friend.

You see, when you spend less time with her, your husband will probably also spend less time with her.

This could theoretically solve your problem.

However, to be completely honest with you, it’s rarely just about the friend.

If you have a huge problem with the entire situation, it’s probably because you also don’t trust your husband not to give in to your friend’s temptations.

In that case, you need to do a lot more work – if you want your marriage to last, you need to talk about this and find a way to trust your husband.

What now?

Friendships can be complicated and sometimes friendships between a married couple and their single friends can become an issue.

If you are worried that your friend is too friendly with your husband, these tips should help you deal with the situation.

If you feel like your friend is coming on too strong with your husband, make sure to communicate that to your friend.

By now, you should have a better understanding of what to do when your friend flirts with your husband.

The truth is, marriage is hard.

There are plenty of reasons to call it quits and give up, but only you know for sure if your marriage is worth fighting for.

And if it is, if you want to get back the love and commitment you once shared with your spouse, don’t give up just yet.

I mentioned Brad Browning earlier. His Mend the Marriage course offers practical, real-life advice that could help you revive your marriage.

Here’s a link to his video once again.

Before writing your marriage off, it’s well worth watching the video and learning where you went wrong, and how to rectify it.

You got this.

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.