So, your ex started to date the girl he cheated with. And you’re looking for ways to deal with this situation and get back on track.
I know how it feels. It’s devastating, it’s like torture, and you might think there’s nothing you can do about it.
That’s what I experienced myself a few months ago when I thought the world had ended for me.
But guess what? I found ways to deal with it and recover more quickly than I imagined!
So, let me share my experience with you and provide some tips on how to react if your ex is dating the girl he cheated with.
1) Don’t try to get revenge — it won’t work
The first and most important thing I want to share with you is that you should not try to get revenge.
I know you might want to. I know you might want to tell all his friends about what he did to you.
But, believe me, it won’t work.
You will just make things worse for yourself and for him as well.
Why am I so convinced?
Well, that was exactly what I tried to do once I understood that my ex-boyfriend started dating the girl he cheated on me with.
I was so mad and felt so betrayed that I wanted to do something about it. So, I told all his friends about what he did.
I thought taking revenge would help me get over him.
And guess what? It didn’t work as I expected.
The reason is that I was in the affected condition and I couldn’t realize that it wasn’t about me to decide.
After all, however bad you feel about it, everyone deserves happiness, and everyone deserves to make their own choices, right?
In the end, I just ended up hurting myself again.
So here’s the thing:
Even if you manage to get back at him in a way that makes him suffer, it won’t help you get over him. On the contrary, it could make things even worse for you.
And even if he feels bad because of what you did, it won’t bring your relationship back or make him miss you more. Trust me on this one!
So, instead of thinking about taking revenge, be proud of yourself because you managed to let them do whatever they want to do because you don’t really care.
2) Deal with your emotions — don’t bury them deep inside yourself
After ensuring that you’re not taking revenge and you’re focusing on yourself, here’s what you should know:
If you think this situation is impossible to deal with, then you’re simply wrong.
Because everyone can deal with breakups! But only if you understand the ways to work on your emotions and process them.
I mean, you have to understand that it’s not easy to deal with a breakup.
Everyone deals with them in their own way, but the most important thing is to understand that you’re not alone and there are ways to get over anyone.
And dealing with your emotions is one of the ways to get over it!
I know this because that’s the method therapists tend to use whenever they work on relationship issues.
So, if you want to get over the fact that your ex is dating the girl he cheated with, try to deal with your emotions.
Just don’t bury them deep inside yourself!
Instead, realize that you can deal with these negative feelings!
And the first thing you need to do is let go of all the emotions and anger inside yourself. I
If you keep them inside yourself, they will eat at your heart until there’s nothing left of it.
As a result, you will become a bitter and cynical person who has lost his faith in love and the world around him.
So, let go of those emotions now! Don’t let them control your life anymore!
3) Start with yourself — celebrate your independence
Want to know a sure way to handle the situation when your ex is dating the girl he cheated with?
Start with yourself!
You have to try to be proud of yourself!
Believe it or not, you have a lot to be proud of. I know it’s hard to enjoy your own achievements when you’re going through a bad breakup, but you really have a lot to be proud of!
Yes, you did go through the worst breakup ever, but now you’re free to do whatever you want and live your life the way you want.
And this is an achievement!
If there was one thing I learned during my breakup it was that I was such an amazing person, nobody could take that away from me.
I was happy and confident in myself and I didn’t need someone to make me feel good about myself.
My ex did that for a while, but when I was with him, I lost sight of who I was.
When he left me, I was really proud of myself again because I was able to recover and stay strong and happy. You might think that as soon as you’ve found out that your ex is dating the girl he cheated with, you’re done.
But you’re not done, you’re just at the beginning! You’re just starting to find who you really are again. You’re getting stronger every day, and soon you won’t see the ex who ended your relationship anymore.
You’ll see a new you that’s proud of herself and deserves only the best!
But how is this possible?
Well, you have to work on developing a strong relationship with your inner self. And I know a way to help you with this.
After I experienced a breakup, I found a world-renowned shaman Rudá Iandê and his incredible masterclass — Love and Intimacy.
He shared his diverse experience with me and taught me that overcoming difficulties in my love life is only possible if you learn how to develop a relationship with your own self.
I know it might sound confusing but believe me, his practical solutions will surprise you.
And don’t forget to start enjoying your independence right now because it’s one of the best things that can happen after a breakup.
4) Take time to recover – it’s a breakup!
Personally, I believe that one of the best tips I’ve ever received about my issues with my ex and his new partner is that I should take time to recover.
Yes, it might sound cliche, it might sound so trivial but that’s not how it is.
Recovering from a breakup is one of the most important things you can do and I know how hard it is to do that. I know how much you want to be happy again and I understand what you’re going through!
And that’s why I have created a step-by-step guide for myself, which helped me to understand what to do when my ex started dating someone new.
The key here is to realize that there’s no timeline for how long it’ll take to recover from a breakup.
It can take days, weeks, or months. It’s different for everyone, and there’s no right or wrong way of dealing with it.
The best thing to do is to give your emotions time to run their course.
Being eager to jump into a new relationship too soon after your breakup can cause you to make the same mistakes again and end up in another unhealthy relationship.
You don’t need to rush anything. You can take your time to heal and when you feel ready, you can start dating again.
It’s just a breakup!
You’ve been in a relationship with your ex for a while and when you break up, it takes a while before you can start seeing other people.
You need to heal, you need to find yourself again, and you need to understand what went wrong in your relationship.
And believe me, it will work once enough time has passed.
I know this because I have a whole new life now, and I know that it deserves to be enjoyed for what it is. And as soon as someone tries to take that away from me, I will defend myself!
So I think recovery is so important after a breakup and you should do it in the way that works best for you.
5) Look on the bright side – it’s a sign that you deserve better
Let me ask you a question.
Have you ever tried to take a positive perspective and look at things from a different outlook?
I always do this after every breakup. I find that looking at things from a positive perspective is so important.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the negative, and it’s so hard to see the good when you are hurting. But it is possible!
And that’s why I do this before every breakup.
I find that it helps me to look on the bright side, see what I can be grateful for, and to make sure that I am doing everything I can to make myself happy again.
So if you haven’t tried to convince yourself that your breakup is a sign that you deserve better, you definitely should!
Because it works perfectly fine!
When I was going through my breakup and the pain I felt, I used to tell myself that it meant I deserved better than him. I would tell myself that I deserved someone who was more understanding and that I deserved a guy who could love me for me.
I found a whole new way of thinking about myself, and I found a whole new way of seeing the world around me. And it was amazing!
That’s why I’m sure about this:
You will feel better if you take the time to look at things from a positive perspective.
And this is definitely not the way to go about it, but look at this from a positive point of view.
It’s a sign that you deserve better. Your ex cheated on you, and now he’s doing it again.
It’s clear to you now that you should’ve broken up with him a long time ago. Let that be the thing that motivates you to move on.
Let it push you to find someone who really wants to be with you. Let it make you stronger and more confident in yourself.
6) Realize that you can’t change other people’s behavior
Now let me introduce another useful tip to get over the fact that your ex cheated on you.
Realize that even if you are upset, there is nothing that you can do about it.
Because the way people behave is independent of what we want and what we think. And there’s nothing we can do about it.
They’re independent human beings who have their own feelings and their own thoughts.
They do not want to be with you, and they don’t want to apologize for what they did.
In short, you can’t change how other people behave. You can only change yourself and go after the person who actually wants to be with you.
I know that this sounds very harsh, but it’s not as bad as it seems.
If you realize this and accept it, then you will feel a lot better about your situation.
And I am sure that as soon as you realize this, things will start looking up again!
So, try to accept that your ex is dating the girl he cheated with. Yes, he’s making the wrong decision and he’s making the girl he cheated with happy, but you can’t change his behavior.
You can’t change his decision. You can’t change his actions. You can’t change the way he treats his new girlfriend.
You can’t change how he treats her. You can’t change how he makes her feel. You can’t change his feelings or his decision to be with her.
The best thing you can do is to let go.
Let go of your feelings, let go of the past and let go of your ex. Let go of the feelings you have for him and the feelings you have for her. Don’t let them rule your life anymore.
7) Put up boundaries
Okay, if you’re looking for a more practical tip to get over the fact that your ex cheated on you, you should think about putting up boundaries between him and yourself.
Let’s explain how this works.
Healthy boundaries are something every relationship requires. Even if you broke up with your ex already, you still need to have boundaries.
Boundaries are there to protect you and keep you happy and safe.
This will help you regain control over your life.
It’s not about being mean or cutting off from your friends and family. It’s about getting your life back in order and recognizing what’s happening around you.
You might not be able to get rid of the pain, but you can put it aside for a moment and do something that’ll help you feel better.
So, take some time out every day to deal with your emotions and get your thoughts in order.
Find a support network. Talk to a friend, talk to a therapist, talk to a helpline. Know your limits. Know when to say no. Get back to your daily routine. Get back to work, get back to studying, and get back to the things that are good for you.
To be honest, at the beginning of my breakup, I struggled to do so. But then I received advice from a relationship coach who convinced me that healthy boundaries were crucial to moving on.
A certified relationship coach I contacted was from Relationship Hero. It’s a network of highly trained relationship coaches that provide tailor-made advice to people who struggle in their relationships.
So, if you want to learn how to get through your situation and handle the fact that your ex is dating the girl he cheated with, click here to check them out.
8) Take care of yourself physically and mentally
It goes without saying that taking care of your mental and physical health should be your top priority after a breakup.
And you’re especially vulnerable if you can’t deal with the fact that your ex is dating the girl he cheated with.
You need to get your body and mind back in order before you can move on.
And you know what?
It’s not enough to just move on from the relationship, you need to focus on yourself too.
The reason is that you’re in a difficult situation and it’s important that you take care of yourself so you don’t fall apart.
Here are some tips on how you can do that.
- Manage your stress – find ways to manage your stress. It doesn’t have to be meditation or yoga, it can be something else.
- Eat healthily – you need to eat healthy because your body needs the energy and nutrients it can get from food to cope with the stress and emotions you’re going through.
- Exercise – exercise is a great way to relieve stress and it’s important for your mental health as well.
- Sleep well – get as much sleep as you can because you will heal better when you’re rested.
Do anything that’ll make you feel happy and good about yourself again. There’s no better time than now to start doing that!
9) Don’t act like a victim — be strong and move on with your life
Have you already started to feel like a victim of the breakup?
The first thing people do when they experience something like this is to act like victims.
I know this because I felt like a victim because I could not move on and I was stuck in my own head.
I didn’t want to get out of bed and go through my day because it just felt so pointless.
It was like I had no purpose or meaning in my life anymore.
How do you get rid of that feeling? How do you get back to being happy with yourself?
Well, here’s how: don’t act like a victim because you aren’t!
Having this thought in your mind will only make you feel worse about what happened, and it won’t help you move on from the breakup at all. So stop thinking about it!
Instead, think about the future! What can you do to make yourself happy? How can you move forward from this situation so that one day, when you look back at it, you’ll be happy you went through all of this?
When we think about the past and how bad things went wrong, it makes us feel bad about ourselves and our choices.
But when we think about how much better things are going to be in the future, we will be able to look back at our lives with a sense of pride instead of regret for having gone through all that pain.
It’s like I said above, it’s going to be devastating for you, and it will take a long time for you to recover.
And in the meantime, you’re going to make your life even worse by doing stupid things that will only make your situation worse.
So, don’t do that! It’s not worth it! You’re better than that!
10) Don’t try to regain his attention
And finally, don’t try to regain his attention.
That’s the crucial thing you should never forget after being cheated on.
You’re probably thinking about confronting him and telling him that you’re better off without him and that you’re doing great without him and his new relationship.
But you really shouldn’t. You can’t just try to get his attention again.
No matter what you do, you won’t be able to regain his attention. He’s chosen the girl he cheated with, and he’s happy with her.
He’s not looking for ways to get back in touch with you. He doesn’t miss you or your relationship.
Try to realize that he’s moved on, and there’s nothing you can do about it. And don’t even think about regaining his attention because he’s not worth it.
You deserve so much better than being in a relationship with someone who’s cheated on you.
All in all, I can say that cheating is never easy to deal with. But it’s incredibly difficult if you realize that your ex has started dating the girl he cheated on you with.
However, you already know some practical tips on what to think about and things to consider before opening your heart again. Try to remember all the things I’ve just mentioned, and you’ll be fine.
You’re a great person who deserves much better than being with a cheater. Make sure you don’t give up on yourself, and keep moving forward towards your future.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
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