It’s not that strange for sexual tensions to bloom in the office.
And to make things even more complicated, the woman who has the “hots” for you is married.
But before you jump to conclusions, you want to be absolutely sure you’re not just seeing things.
So in this article, I will show you 21 signs that will tell you that, yes, your married coworker wants to sleep with you.
1) She touches you— a lot.
Most of us naturally get the impulse to touch the people we’re attracted to.
Now, she might try to be discreet, so she’s probably not going to grab your hand out of nowhere. But there are plenty of opportunities available for her nonetheless.
She might playfully slap you or rest her hand on your shoulder as if you’re best buds, or her fingers might linger a little longer than necessary when she’s passing you papers.
Small things like these might not scream “I need you in my bed!” right away, but tip your subconscious off when they happen consistently and often enough.
2) She whispers things to your ears.
She probably hasn’t said anything too explicitly sexual of course, because you wouldn’t be here reading this article otherwise.
But she does like to whisper things in your ear.
It’s almost like she’s always eager to share a secret with you… even if what she has to say isn’t actually a secret at all!
She might be a seductress, and she’s doing this because she knows that the ears are one of the more sensitive erogenous zones on your body.
3) She talks about her sex life.
What better way to make one think of you sexually than to have them imagine you having sex?
She knows this, and the way she does this is by talking to you about her sex life. And, as an added bonus, she gets to show you what she wants and needs!
She might talk to you about how her husband isn’t doing enough, and what he’s doing wrong in bed. Or she might share with you the things she’s always fantasized doing.
If she’s especially loud about how bad her husband is, she might even be trying to make you dare to step up and please her.
4) She asks about your sex life.
An even bigger sign is that on top of telling you about her sex life, she also asks you about yours.
She asks this not only so that she’ll know what you’re like in the bedroom, but also to rile you up.
It’s also more a message than a question. The details don’t matter as much to her as the eventual goal of having you know that she’s interested in you sexually.
5) She showers you with attention…then pulls away.
That is to say, she goes hot and cold with you.
This is something that people can do on purpose to make themselves irresistible to the people they want, but it can also be something that happens unconsciously.
When she does this, the best thing you can do—if you want her too—is to pull away a bit yourself.
See, people are likely to get attached to something they are afraid of losing. When you want something, and you know there’s a chance you may lose it, you can’t help but want to hold it a little tighter.
There’s more to it of course. And if you want to get her obsessed with you then you’ll want to check out this excellent free video.
This is from relationship guru Bobby Rio. I like him. His advice is always very straightforward and practical.
What you might see in that video isn’t necessarily going to be pretty… but it will guide you in getting exactly what you want in life and in your relationships.
6) She stares at you like she wants to devour you.
She’s crazy for you and you can see it written in her eyes.
She stares at your body like you’re Adonis, and she isn’t shy about it.
You may notice her staring at you and even be a little uncomfortable, but she’ll keep staring at you anyways.
See, that’s precisely what she wants. She wants you to feel her sexual energy through her gaze!
7) She wears revealing outfits if she knows you’re around.
You could swear that she dresses up for the occasion every time her assignments put her near you, or when a meeting puts the two of you together.
Her clothes are almost borderline inappropriate for the office, and you’re left wondering how she gets away with it.
She makes sure you’d notice it too, like leaning towards you so that you can see her chest, or flipping her hair beside you so that you can smell her shampoo.
And you know, having seen her from afar, that she doesn’t normally present herself like this all the time.
8) She finds a way to be near you.
She always “hangs around” near your cubicle even if she doesn’t really have any obligations or friends to justify her being there.
She might also go off to eat at the same time you do, and might even sit near you… if not at the same table!
Small things like these might not seem much, but they’re her trying to catch your attention and give you opportunities to make your move.
9) She invites you over to her place.
You say something so mundane like your love for classic horror movies and she’d say “Oh, I have a huge Blu-ray collection. Wanna come over?”
Or it could be something related to work. You know that things can be easily done at the office but she insists you both should work at her apartment.
Well, she’s probably trying to get into your pants while her husband is away. Don’t be surprised if she’ll make advances the moment you step inside her apartment.
10) She gets inappropriate with you when she’s “drunk.”
She touches your thighs, she wraps herself around you, she gets raunchy.
But she only had one drink!
Well, she’s simply using alcohol to do what she’s always wanted to do with you.
She knows that it’s a good excuse if she gets caught. She’d just say that it’s just the alcohol making her do things.
She might even say she can’t recall doing those things to you.
11) She flirts with you in a joking way.
Married women have a free pass to openly flirt with anyone they like because they can just easily deny it afterwards.
She’d “joke” about how much she’s been thinking of you when she’s alone. But then laughs afterwards.
She’s teasing you, of course. She’s just passing it as a joke so it doesn’t come across as sleazy.
12) She tells you how unsatisfied she is with her husband.
When you have some instances where you get serious in your convos, she shares how miserable she is at home.
It’s a way for you to get closer together, but it’s also a message to you that you can steal her anytime you want because she’s already unhappy with her husband.
If you’re already at this level of closeness—when she starts revealing her real feelings and problems— it’s hard not to fall in love with her.
Sex is easy, but when you fall in love with a married woman…man, it’s hard. And just in case things go that way for both of you, it’s good if you are prepared.
To that end, I would recommend consulting with a highly trained relationship coach from Relationship Hero. They’re a popular resource for people facing tough dilemmas like this for a reason—they are genuinely good at what they do.
It might seem like a bit of a leap to go straight to relationship talk when you’re still trying to figure out if your coworker wants to drag you to her bed… but it’ll come in handy. Trust me.
13) She sends you flirty texts.
A married woman knows how to play safely— to flirt while still leaving a foot in the door for plausible deniability.
She might greet you in the morning with “you’re looking nice today!” or rile you up with a kinky meme she grabbed from the internet.
Texting is easily the best way for her to flirt with you without being too obvious. Plus, she won’t likely get caught unless her husband has access to her phone.
14) Her friends leave when you’re around.
Most girls—even grown women—share their crushes and latest conquests. It’s just how they bond.
She might be married, but she trusts her best friends enough to support her… especially if they know that she isn’t too happy at home.
So when they see you near her, they go quiet and find a way to exit. They do this so you both can have your moment.
15) She asks for your help (even though she doesn’t need it).
She says she’s struggling with her video presentation and would need your help.
And yet, you have a strong feeling that she’s just using it as an excuse.
You don’t think you’re that good at videos, yourself—if anything, she’s the one who’s actually good at the job!
She doesn’t really need your help and you know it. What she wants is your company—the happiness of having someone she likes nearby.
16) She giggles at your jokes as if you’re tickling her.
You don’t think of yourself as a comedian. Not by a long shot. And yet somehow she always manages to be entertained by even your worst jokes.
There’s a slim chance that she just so happens to have your exact same sense of humor.
But what’s more likely is that she simply likes you so much that even your dullest, blandest jokes are music in her ears.
17) She sighs out of frustration.
Sexual frustration is not an easy thing to handle.
It can drive you crazy if it’s been going on for too long!
And that’s what’s happening with her. You hear her sigh whenever you pass by or when you have an intense conversation.
You can sense she wants to grab you but she’s just restraining herself. So all you hear are sighs—and lots of them.
18) She compliments you on your looks.
Women rarely compliment a guy’s looks because most of them fear men would take it the wrong way—that they’re attracted to them.
But your married coworker showers you with compliments.
She doesn’t restrain herself from telling you just how hot you are. She says “wow, you really have nice biceps” or “You’re incredibly sexy in your pants!”
19) She fidgets when talking to you.
You can see her being visibly distressed when you’re around.
She squirms in her seat, she keeps adjusting her clothes… it’s as if she just can’t stay put.
This is because she has so much pent-up sexual tension inside of her, and it all revolves around you.
20) She blushes when you look at her.
Most married women stray because they’re already in unhappy relationships. And most of the time, when a marriage is already dying, both parties are hungry for affection.
So when you give her your attention, she’d feel all the feels.
She’d feel alive again, she’d feel good about herself again…because a person she fancies is laying his eyes on her.
Sometimes, genuine attention is all we need.
21) She isn’t bothered when you touch her.
Like, at all.
And even if you leave your hands on her lap for minutes, she wouldn’t budge.
You would expect her to pull her hand back and frown at you if she isn’t interested in betraying her husband at all… but no.
That’s not what she does. If anything, she might even smile at you to encourage you to go on.
She wants it and she’s just waiting for the time when you’d “level up” on your moves.
Office flings can be a little exciting, a little taboo, a little risky—and they are! Some people get fired for it.
But hey, if you know how to play it right, you’re free to have a fling with your married co-worker.
Just remember to act with discretion and to guard your heart. And of course, if things get complicated down the road, make sure to get proper guidance from a coach at Relationship Hero.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
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