22 tips if you broke up with him but now want him back

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Your relationship seemed perfect, and you don’t know what went wrong. 

Now that you have broken up with your boyfriend, you’ve realized you want him back.

If you are willing to give it another chance with your ex-boyfriend then here are 22 tips that can help you get him back so that the two of you could give things another shot again.

Let’s jump right in:

1) Ask yourself why you broke up in the first place

Before you do anything, you must ask yourself why you broke up with your boyfriend in the first place. 

If you don’t know the reason behind your decision, then it will be very difficult for you to get him back after breaking up. 

For example: 

Maybe you broke up with your boyfriend because of the way he treated you. If so, then you must let him know that while you love him and want to get back together, he needs to change his behavior if the relationship is to work the second time around. 

Or, maybe you broke up with him because you don’t want to settle down and everything was moving too fast. If so, then you must make him understand that you want to take things slowly and that you’re not ready for a big commitment just yet.

2) Be sure you really want to get back together

A big part of getting your ex back is making sure that you really want to be with him. 

On the one hand, if you are regretting your decision to break up with him because you suddenly feel lonely and only want to get back together to avoid being alone, don’t bother. 

You’ll only be leading yourself towards more heartbreak, and you could be setting yourself up for a repeat of the same situation. If you don’t really want to be with him anymore and only want to fill a void, it is best to move on.

On the other hand, if you are still in love with your ex, if you miss the relationship, and if you want to make the relationship work, then you should consider getting him back. 

Only then can you work towards a better future for both of you. 

3) Ask yourself what wrong

Relationships can be hard. Break-ups: even harder. 

Sometimes you don’t know if breaking up was the right thing to do and whether you should give it another go with your ex.

You miss them, but at the same time, something wasn’t working.

But I want to suggest a solution. You have all the tools you need to do this right now, right where you are. 

I learned about this from the modern-day shaman Rudá Iandê. He taught me how the lies we tell ourselves about love are part of what leads us to break up, only to regret doing so. 

As Rudá explains in this transformational free video, love is available to us if we cut through the lies that we tell ourselves. 

We need to face the facts about our expectations about relationships and love. 

The alternative is to end up in loveless relationships or endless dating frustration that only leaves us cold and empty. 

The alternative is to be sunk in stagnant codependency and completely unable to understand each other and make compromises. 

Rudá’s teachings showed me a whole new perspective. 

While watching, I felt like someone understood my struggles to find love for the first time – and finally offered an actual, practical solution to the issues I was facing with my partner. 

If you’re done with wasting your time on love that doesn’t work, I invite you to watch this short video and open your mind to new possibilities. 

Click here to watch the free video.

4) Let him know that you are still confused

While it’s true that you want to get back together with your boyfriend, you might still be confused about your feelings. 

You might not be sure if you want to get back together with him or not. Let him know that you are still processing your feelings. You can do this by saying something like “I miss you, but I also want to take things slowly”. 

Let him know that you want to take things slowly so that he doesn’t get confused or feel pressured to commit to a relationship with you.

5) Pay attention to your emotions

After breaking up with your boyfriend, you might have felt a lot of negative emotions such as anger, guilt, regret, remorse, and sorrow. 

However, after some time, you might have noticed some positive feelings as well. 

If you have fallen in love with your boyfriend again, then you might have started feeling butterflies in your stomach, excitement, and nervousness. 

Your emotions are a great way to know if you want your boyfriend back in your life. If you have fallen in love with him again, then you might have noticed that you miss him a lot. 

You might have realized that you want to be with him again and even spend the rest of your life with him. These positive emotions are a great sign that you want to get your boyfriend back in your life. 

All in all, if you want to get your ex-boyfriend back, then you must pay attention to these positive emotions. You must act on them and let him know that you want to be with him again.

6) Examine the relationship

If you want to get back with your ex-boyfriend, then you must first examine the relationship that you had with him. 

You must ask yourself a few important questions such as “Why did we get along?”, “What was our relationship based on?”, “What do we have in common?”, and “What are the differences between us?”. 

Answer these questions, and you will realize whether or not you should get back with your ex-boyfriend. 

You might have broken up with your boyfriend because you didn’t see a future together. 

However, if you have examined the relationship and have realized that things could have been different if you had given yourself more time, then you must take a step towards getting back together with him again.

7) Why not get in touch with a professional relationship coach?

While this article will shed light on the main ways to get your ex back, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.

With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice tailored to your unique situation…

Relationship Hero is a popular site where highly trained relationship coaches help people work through complex relationship issues, like what to do when you break up with him but now want him back. Their popularity boils down to how skilled their coaches are. 

Why am I so confident that they can help you?

Well, after recently experiencing a rough patch in my own relationship, I reached out to them for help. From the moment I got in touch, I was given genuine, helpful advice, and was finally able to see my relationship issues with real clarity.

I was blown away by how kind and empathetic my coach was. 

Within minutes, you could be receiving life-changing advice on how to navigate and repair the issues you’re facing in your relationship.

Click here to get started.

8) Give him space to miss you

After you have broken up with your boyfriend, he might be very confused and unsure about his feelings. 

He might have started missing you a lot, but he might not have realized it yet. 

You must let him know that you want to get back together with him by giving him space to miss you. 

You must make him feel that you are missing him as well. You can do this by sending him a message saying that you miss him, or you can send him a gift that reminds him of you. 

However, don’t overdo it! 

He’ll probably be feeling angry with you for breaking up with him, so give him a chance to miss you before you tell him you want to get back together. Trust me, it will be easier that way.

9) Implement the no-contact rule

The no-contact rule means that you can’t talk to your ex for a certain amount of time (usually about 10-15 days) so that you can both cool down and re-evaluate why the relationship ended. 

No contact also gives you time to focus on yourself and get your emotions in check so that you’re not acting out of desperation or a need to have your ex back at any cost. 

During this time, you should focus on healing yourself and taking good care of yourself.

10) Take care of yourself physically and emotionally

Getting your ex back can be a long-term process, so you can’t afford to get too stressed out about it. 

Healing yourself and taking care of your emotions is important, but you also need to make sure that you are taking care of your body by getting enough sleep, eating healthy meals, and exercising regularly. 

Taking care of yourself physically and emotionally will also help you be more attractive to your ex and make it easier for him to want to get back together with you.

11) Don’t be too eager

You have to show your ex that you are interested in getting back with him but that you are not desperate or overly eager to do so. 

if you’re too eager, he might feel like you’re pressuring him and he might not want to get back together with you because of that. 

You need to let him know that you want him back, but in a way that doesn’t make him feel pressured into doing so. 

Showing some restraint might seem difficult, but it is important if you want to get your ex back and do so in a way that doesn’t make either of you feel uncomfortable.

12) Send him friendly texts to rekindle the flame

In my experience, this is one of the best tips that can help you get him back. 

If you have broken up with your boyfriend recently and regret your decision, then you can think about sending him some friendly texts. 

But make sure that you don’t send him too many texts or you’ll seem desperate. 

This will help you get him back because sending him friendly texts to rekindle the flame will show him that you are serious about your decision. 

If you are sending him friendly texts regularly, he will start thinking about you and will miss you.

13) Enjoy life as a single person before reaching out to him

Feeling like you need to rush back into a relationship with your ex will only make things more difficult. 

You don’t have to rush back into a relationship with him and you can enjoy the single life for a while before you reach out to him. 

Take some time to enjoy life as a single person again and you will feel less pressured when you do decide to get back in touch with him. 

Enjoying life as a single person will also make you more attractive to your ex and will make it easier for him to want to get back together with you.

14) Regain his trust first

Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship, so if your ex doesn’t trust you enough to get back together with you, then you may have a problem. 

To get him to trust you and want to get back together with you, you need to take things slow and show him that you have changed and that you have matured as a person. 

If you have done something to hurt him, you need to make sure that you’ve addressed that issue and that you’ve changed your ways before getting back in touch with him.

15) Spend time as friends

Being friends with your ex can help you get back together with him more easily because it will give you a chance to ease back into a relationship with him and get his trust back. 

Getting back together with him right after a breakup might be tempting, but it’s a bad idea because it will put too much pressure on your relationship and might even make him want to get back together with you less. 

By spending time together as friends first and getting back into a relationship at a slower pace, you will make it easier for him to trust you again and get back together with you.

16) Learn from your mistakes

Here’s the thing: If you want your ex back, then you will have to earn his trust again. 

And for that, you need to be honest about your past mistakes. You should be prepared to talk about your relationships and where it all went wrong. 

If you were wrong to break up, you have to admit your mistake. You should explain to him that you have changed and have become a better person.

Be honest with him and tell him how you’ve learned from your mistake. 

If both of you have changed after the breakup and have become better individuals, then you should make an effort to get him back again.

17) Work on yourself

After a breakup, it is important to work on yourself before you go back to your ex. 

This means you need to start figuring out who you are outside of the relationship.

It is also a good idea that you take some time off from dating. It is best if you don’t rush into another relationship. 

Slowly reestablish yourself by spending time with friends, family, and co-workers. 

Participate in activities that you love doing. 

You can also work on improving your social skills so that you can start making new friends. 

Try to be more positive about yourself and your life. If you can’t find the inner peace you are looking for, you can try to get in touch with a therapist. A therapist can help you get more clarity about your life and find a new direction.

18) Talk about why you broke up and how you can make it work this time around

If you want to get your ex back, then you should talk about why you broke up. 

But, you should also talk about how you can make the relationship work this time around. It is important to talk about both these things. 

Breaking up with him without any proper reason and just running away from the relationship will make him feel frustrated. He will be eager to know why he is being broken up with. 

You can tell him that you broke up with him because you wanted to try new things in your life and you didn’t want to be tied down with a relationship. 

Discussing how you can make the relationship work this time around will help him know that you still want to be with him. 

Tell him that you want to make things work this time around and that breaking up was a mistake. 

19) Face-to-face communication is key

If you want to get back with your ex-boyfriend, then you must let him know that you want to meet him in person. 

You must let him know that you want to talk to him face to face and not through messages. 

When you talk to your ex-boyfriend’s face to face, you will feel a lot more comfortable and confident. You can get rid of your insecurities and any doubts that you might have had. 

You will be able to talk to him about your feelings and what you want from the future. These are the things that you cannot do when you are communicating with him through messages.

20) Be patient

It often takes time to make things work out between two people who have ended a relationship. 

You don’t want to rush things and you don’t want to act too desperate or eager. 

If you care about him and want him to get back with you, you have to be patient and take things slow. 

The truth is that rushing things will only make you look desperate and you will also put unnecessary pressure on your ex which might push him further away from you.

21) Don’t rush right back to normal routines

When you get back together with your ex after a breakup, don’t try to go back to your normal routines right away. 

Take things slowly and ease your way back into your relationship. 

Getting back together with your ex might be the best decision for both of you. However, you have to be strategic about it and take things slowly if you want to have a successful relationship.

22) Don’t expect things to go back to the way they were

Getting your ex back after a breakup might be what you want, but you also have to be realistic about it. 

Getting back together with your ex means that things will be different and you can’t expect them to go back to the way they were before the breakup. 

It’s likely that both of your personalities have changed and that you will be different people than you were before the breakup

By remaining flexible and open to the changes, you will be able to make your relationship stronger and last longer.

Conclusion

Breakups are hard, and sometimes, they’re a mistake.

If you want to get back with your ex-boyfriend, then follow the tips in this article.

They will help you get your ex back after a breakup and make your relationship stronger than ever before.

The top 10 reasons couples break up and how to prevent them from happening to you!

Let’s get real. Breakups suck! 

Even if you knew it was coming, when it actually happens it doesn’t feel any less painful. It also feels like the end of the world and you can never trust anyone again. 

Right? Wrong! 

You will get past this, and you will find love again… just not with that person. So before that next breakup hits, read these top 10 reasons why couples break up and how to prevent them from happening to you.

1) Communication problems

If you don’t talk to each other and clearly express your feelings, problems, and concerns, they can’t be solved. 

Now, if your partner is not open to talking, you can’t expect things to improve. If you feel like your partner is shutting you out, then they are also shutting themselves out from a happy future with you. 

Take a break from the relationship if necessary to get some space and more importantly learn how to communicate without resentment and anger. 

Communication problems can be caused by many things, including unresolved past issues, different communication styles, the wrong approach to communicating, and poor emotional intelligence.

2) Commitment issues

Commitment issues are normally a red flag from the beginning of a relationship. 

It can be anything from not wanting to stay over, not wanting to meet your friends, or having a reluctance to discuss the future. 

There are two types of commitment issues. The first is a serious lack of commitment. This person may be on the search for something better or is unsure if they want a relationship at all. 

The second is a lack of commitment due to fear of being hurt or rejected. This person wants to be in a relationship, but it’s hard for them to commit because of fear. 

Some people are also commitment-phobic. If your partner won’t commit to you, you can’t commit to them either. You must walk away from this relationship before it destroys you.

3) Different life goals

If your life goals are different from your partner’s, you might be able to adjust and make compromises for a while, but eventually, you will resent them for holding you back from achieving and obtaining the things you want in life. 

If your partner doesn’t want to go to college, start a business, buy a house, or have children, try to find a way to accept their desires and make a compromise. 

If they don’t want to make any concessions, you must end the relationship before it causes you even more pain.

4) Lack of attraction

The sad truth is that a lack of attraction is one of the top reasons for breakups. 

What used to turn you on about your partner doesn’t anymore. 

You may have even tried to talk yourself into it being okay, but inside you know it’s not working. 

If you find yourself saying things like, “I love them, but I’m not attracted to them,” or “I’m not turned on by them anymore,” then your relationship is in trouble. 

Now, there are times when you can find that spark again – but it will take some work from both of you.

But if it’s been a while and you still just don’t feel that attraction, then it could be a reason you break up.

5) Taking each other for granted

Being in a long-term relationship, you get used to each other and your routine, and it’s easy to take each other for granted. 

You stop putting in the effort that you did in the beginning. You may look at your partner and think, “They’re fine. I don’t need to put in much effort.” 

You don’t go on dates as often, you don’t do “little things” for each other as often. 

And when one person stops putting in the effort, the other does too. 

Unfortunately, couples often break up when one or both people take each other for granted. 

Simply put, you need to put in that effort to keep the relationship strong.

6) Falling in love with someone new

Falling in love with someone new can happen for a variety of reasons. 

Maybe you and your partner broke up for a period of time and had lots of time to be with other people and make new connections. 

Maybe you’ve been in the same relationship for a long time and started dating someone new. 

The bottom line is that people who are in a relationship or married can fall in love with someone new – it just happens. 

You may still like or love your partner and want to stay with them, and fall for someone else at the same time.

If you do, you need to decide who you really want to be with and break it off with the other person before causing too much pain and suffering.

7) Egos clash

One of you has way too big an ego, they’re too full of themselves, and they want to be the center of attention

If both people have a healthy ego, they will feel like they’re on an even playing field and not be threatened by the other person’s success. 

If someone has a large ego and you don’t, you will feel inferior to them and it will cause problems in the relationship.

8) No shared interests

If you don’t have any common interests, it’s hard to stay together. 

You will get bored quickly, and you will look for other things to do. 

If you’re outgoing and love to socialize but you have a partner who loves to stay home, watch TV, and do nothing, you will get bored and start to resent them.

If you don’t find some common interests, the relationship doesn’t really stand a chance.

9) The other person is already married or engaged

If you know the person you’re dating is already married or engaged, but you want to be in a relationship with them, you will end up being the person they cheat with – their lover – and that’s usually not a very nice position to find yourself in. 

What’s more, it often happens that the person who is already married doesn’t want to leave their spouse which means that you have no real chance of a future with them. 

My advice is to stay clear of someone who is already in a relationship.

10) You’re with the wrong person

Sometimes we’re with the wrong person, but we don’t realize it until it’s too late. You may be with the wrong person and not even know it. 

You may be with someone who treats you poorly, but you don’t leave the relationship because you don’t know any better. 

If you’re dating someone and you’re not happy, you’re with the wrong person. You need to end the relationship before it gets too serious or someone gets hurt or moves in with each other and regrets it. 

You can end the relationship, learn from it, and then move on to find the right person.

11) Differences in race and culture

Finally, if you’re dating someone from a different race or culture, you should realize that you have different backgrounds, traditions, and beliefs. 

It’s impossible to completely change who you are and what you believe in. You may have a lot in common with your partner and be in love, but if you hold onto your culture and beliefs, it can cause problems in the relationship. 

If you want to be with someone from a different culture, you must be willing to learn about each other’s beliefs and be willing to compromise. You need to be open-minded and flexible for things to work out.

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.