Breakups can be rough, especially if your ex-girlfriend starts flirting with other guys and you’re left feeling heartbroken.
The good news is, if you want her back there are plenty of ways to get her to like you again.
Here are 17 insanely effective ways to re-attract your ex-girlfriend after a breakup
Let’s get started:
1) Find your confidence
A key component to getting your ex-girlfriend back is having confidence in yourself.
Let’s face it, if you don’t believe in yourself, how will she?
Your ex-girlfriend wants to be with a man who is in command of himself, so act like it.
Be cool – don’t look hurt or sad, and instead be happy and confident. It will get her thinking about how great you two were together.
If you lack confidence and are feeling depressed about the breakup then she will naturally pick up on this.
This isn’t good as she may feel queasy about having a relationship with you because of your negativity.
A good way to overcome this is by forcing yourself to get out there and socialize with other people. This will help you get your self-esteem back and boost your confidence.
The truth of the matter is that women are attracted to confident men, rather than men who are insecure, needy, and full of self-doubt.
Trust me, once you find your mojo (confidence) again, she’ll be running back to you.
2) Don’t chase her
Don’t do it!
It looks desperate.
If you want your ex-girlfriend back, you’ll have to act like you’re getting on with your life, like you have a life plan and goals.
You see, if you chase her, it will look needy and that’s not attractive. Pretending to be indifferent or playing hard to get is what will get her to come back.
If she thinks you’re getting over her and that you don’t need her – she’ll start to wonder if there is somebody else. She’ll ask herself how you’re over her so quickly.
In other words, by not chasing her you’ll get her to be interested in you again.
Your ex-girlfriend will find you irresistible if you give her the space she desires to determine if she wants to be with you again without having to see you constantly.
3) Tell her you want to be just friends
As mentioned above, you don’t want to show all your cards just yet.
You want to play it cool and pretend that you’re moving on. Make her think you just want to be friends.
So what can you do in this situation? Send her this “No Communication” text,
— “You’re right. It’s best that we don’t talk right now, but I would like to be friends eventually.”
This one needs to be sent to your ex at the right time for it to be truly effective.
But why I like it is that you’re communicating to her that you don’t really need to talk anymore. In essence, you’re saying that you don’t really need her to play a role in your life anymore.
Why is this so good?
Because you’ll induce a “fear of loss” in your ex which will trigger her attraction to you again.
I learned about this text from Brad Browning, who has helped thousands of men and women get their exes back. There’s a good reason his nickname is “the relationship geek”.
In this free video, he’ll show you exactly what you can do to make your ex want you again.
No matter what your situation is — or how badly you’ve messed up since the two of you broke up — he’ll give you a number of useful tips that you can apply immediately.
Here’s a link to his free video again. If you really want your ex back, this video will help you do this.
4) Give her some space
After a breakup people need some space to themselves, away from their ex.
They need to figure out what went wrong. They need to remember who they are outside of the relationship.
So my advice is to give her some space.
This will help her find clarity and see if she wants to rekindle the relationship.
But wait there’s more…
By giving her some space you’re letting the breakup and what it really means sink in – essentially you’re giving her time to miss you.
In short, the way to win back your ex-girlfriend is by giving her a chance to see how lonely life is without you.
5) Remind her why she fell in love with you in the first place
Remember the guy you were when you first started dating – the guy she fell in love with? Well, you need to bring back that guy.
This is one of the best ways to get her to fall in love with you all over again.
When you meet up with your ex for coffee, be that guy again. Fun and carefree.
Casually bring up the good old days, some happy memories, funny anecdotes from your adventures together.
Tell her that if you had to do it all over again, you wouldn’t change a thing.
If you remind her of all the reasons she fell in love with you in the first place, she’s guaranteed to fall back in love with you.
6) Make an effort to look good
I’m not going to lie to you. The way you dress and groom yourself makes a big difference in how attractive you are to women.
Women notice the things men don’t – so put a little effort into your personal presentation.
Tidy yourself up and remember that women are visual creatures – what you wear will make a huge difference in how attractive she finds you.
And what’s more, how you look is a reflection of the woman you are with. So, if she makes an effort to look good, you should too.
7) Don’t be needy
To re-attract your ex-girlfriend after a breakup, you’ll have to get her to want you.
If you’re too in need of a relationship at this point, she won’t be interested in getting back together with you.
After all, if you can’t even stand not being in a relationship with her for two weeks, how will you ever survive without her?
If you do want to get back together and don’t want to lose her forever, then act like it.
The bottom line is that you shouldn’t be needy, otherwise, she’ll feel suffocated and won’t enjoy the relationship.
8) Get a professional’s take on things
While this article will shed light on the ways to re-attract your ex-girlfriend, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.
With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice tailored to your unique situation…
Relationship Hero is a popular site where highly trained relationship coaches help people work through complex relationship issues, like getting their ex to fall back in love with them.
Their popularity boils down to how skilled their coaches are.
Why am I so confident that they can help you?
Well, I recently experienced a tough patch in my own relationship, and I reached out to them for help. From the moment I got in touch, I was given genuine, helpful advice, and was finally able to see my relationship issues with real clarity.
I was blown away by how kind and empathetic my coach was.
Within minutes, you could be receiving life-changing advice on how to navigate and mend your broken relationship.
9) Make her jealous
Next time you’re out with friends, show her that you’re having a good time.
Start dating other women.
Make sure your social media is up to date too: Post some snazzy photos and make it look like your life is better than ever. It goes without saying that you should put up some photos of yourself in the company of some pretty ladies.
Nothing over the top – just enough to get her thinking. Best of all, do it subtly so she doesn’t notice what you’re doing. You don’t want her to catch on that you’re trying to make her jealous.
The little green-eyed monster called “jealousy” is surprisingly effective at getting people back together.
10) Hit the gym
What can I say? Women are attracted to men with pecs and six-packs (and I’m not talking about beer).
The truth is that it’s all biology: Women are attracted to healthy men because they want offspring who will be genetically healthy.
So if you’re overweight or skinny, get yourself in shape as fast as you can.
Once she starts noticing all the other fit, athletic men that are suddenly paying attention to her, she’ll wonder what’s wrong with you.
If you’ve been lazy and haven’t taken care of yourself since the breakup, now is the time to start going to the gym and lifting weights.
11) Live your life
Ok, so you broke up with your ex and you want her back.
But that doesn’t mean that life has stopped. Moping around the house won’t solve anything.
Remember that there’s more to life than your ex.
When’s the last time you hung out with the guys watching sports and drinking beer? What about your hobbies? When’s the last time you went rock climbing? And you wanted to start sailing, whatever happened to that?
Now, I’m not saying that you should forget your ex or give up on getting her back. I’m saying that you should keep moving forward in your life and start exploring different things that you’ve always dreamed of doing.
You’ll be amazed at how much more positive you’ll feel when you’re off the couch, out of your ex’s orbit again.
And what’s more, your ex is bound to notice the positive changes which will re-attract her to you.
12) Be nice to her friends
If you want your ex back and want to be in a genuine relationship with her, be nice to her friends.
Make sure you’re on good terms with all of her friends.
Here’s the thing: Women are attracted to men who are liked by their friends, so get her friends on your side and she’ll find it harder not to like you again.
Be nice to them and be friendly with them, so that they see that you’re a good guy. They’ll want to put in a good word for you.
And when they speak well of you to your ex, it will make the decision to take you back easier for her to make.
13) Show her that you’ve changed
Was there something that really annoyed your ex? Was it part of the reason you broke up?
Well, if you want her back, you need to take a hard long look at yourself.
You have to mend your negative ways, you need to address things that are wrong in your life, and you need to make changes so that you’re in a better place emotionally.
Once she sees all that you’ve done and how much you’ve grown, she’ll be so impressed that she’ll want to get back together with you.
This relates back to what Brad Browning taught me – there are simple ways to get your ex back.
I mentioned Brad earlier, he’s an expert at helping couples work through their issues and rebuild their relationships.
With practical tips to help you get your ex back, his advice could be just what you need to re-attract your ex.
14) Make amends
Did you do something to hurt or offend your ex?
Now, you probably didn’t do it on purpose and it doesn’t mean that you’re a bad person, you just made a mistake.
It may have been a miscommunication or perhaps you acted in anger. Maybe you said the wrong thing at the wrong time.
Whatever it was, if you want your ex back, then you need to make amends for whatever it was that upset her.
You’d be surprised at how difficult it is for some people to say “sorry”, but doing so shows that you recognize your mistakes, which in turn means that you’re less likely to repeat them.
The bottom line is that if your apology is sincere and heartfelt, she’ll be more likely to want you back because she’ll see that you truly care about how she feels and that you’re not afraid to admit you were wrong and say sorry.
15) Get her to chase you
Get this: You want her, but the best way to get her is to have her chase you.
In my experience, people want what they can’t have – that’s why you can’t be the one chasing her.
You need to play hard to get. Make her think that you’re not interested, that she can’t have you.
How do you play hard to get?
You go about your life as per usual and don’t contact her as much.
Live your life. Be active, strong, confident, and happy.
If she thinks you’re moving on and don’t think about her anymore – you’ll become more attractive to her than ever before.
16) No drunk dialing or texting
A lot of people make the mistake of getting drunk to get over their breakup and end up drunk dialing or texting their ex. BIG mistake.
The thing is that if you’re going to contact your ex-girlfriend, you should do it completely sober.
Why is this important?
- First, you don’t want to say something you’ll regret.
- Second, you don’t want to sound like a drunk idiot.
- Third, you don’t want to appear desperate.
- Fourth, you want to have a plan of what you want to say when you finally get in touch.
- And finally, you want to be in control during the conversation.
In short: drunken communication can backfire!
17) No re-bound sex
On the one hand, you want to live life to the fullest and you even want to make your ex a little jealous.
On the other hand, if you have re-bound sex with the women you go out with while waiting to get back together with your ex, it might just make things more difficult.
You see, if she finds out that you’ve been with other women, she’ll feel like you betrayed her and were not devoted to her.
If you tell her that you missed her and could hardly wait to get back together with her, the fact that you were with other women might contradict that.
Of course, that doesn’t mean that if you and your ex are separated for a long period of time and someone comes along that you like that you can’t get physical. I’m just saying don’t go crazy if you’re planning on getting your ex back that’s all.
Why do people break up (most common reasons why)
Now that we’ve looked at how you can re-attract your ex-girlfriend, it’s a good idea to explore some of the most common reasons that people break up.
This can give you some clarity so that you don’t end up making the same mistakes once you get back together with your lady.
1) They don’t have the same core values
Two people may love each other, but if they don’t share the same core values, their relationship may not last.
Maybe she’s really religious and wants to get married right away, and he’s an atheist and wants to focus on building his career first.
Or he’s super materialistic and is obsessed with status while she’s always lived a simple life.
(If you’re planning on getting back together with your ex, make sure that this won’t be a problem for you.)
2) They’re not on the same page
This is a big one.
Sometimes the problem is that the two people in the relationship just aren’t on the same page as far as your personal goals and aspirations.
Maybe she wants a career and he wants a family.
Maybe she wants to move in together and he wants to slow things down, maybe travel around the world.
Or maybe one wants children and the other one doesn’t.
Essentially, if people aren’t on the same page, it will make a successful relationship impossible.
3) They don’t understand each other
The problem may be that the two people in a relationship don’t understand each other.
He says something, she hears something else.
Someone gets offended, someone gets angry.
Maybe she’s upset because he doesn’t listen to her when she talks.
Maybe he’s upset because she never considers his feelings when making decisions about their future together.
It’s like they are talking at each other rather than to each other. No matter how hard they try, they just can’t seem to communicate to each other what they feel, want, and need.
4) Bad timing
Yeah, timing is everything.
Sometimes people meet at the wrong time in their lives.
For example – they meet during the summer and fall in love. Fall comes and she has to leave to continue her studies abroad. They’re young. They have their whole lives ahead of them.
She’s not going to abandon her studies to stay with him, and he’s not going to abandon his studies to move for her.
The point is that the timing may not be right for some people the first time round and then their life circumstances change and they find themselves in a different situation.
5) Unrealistic expectations
Everyone has different expectations in relationships and unfortunately, we don’t always get what we want.
The problem is when someone has unrealistic expectations and sets standards that the other person cannot meet. It’s just a matter of time before it all falls apart.
6) Trust issues
Trust is one of the most important elements of a successful relationship.
When one or both partners have trust issues, it can lead to arguments, sadness, and feelings of betrayal.
If not dealt with, trust issues can result in the end of not only this relationship, but many others to come.
In this article, I’ve shared 17 insanely effective ways to re-attract your ex-girlfriend. I’ve also shared some of the most common reasons people break up.
But if you really want your ex back for good?
You’ll need the help of Brad Browning. I mentioned him earlier, he’s developed some incredible techniques to help rebuild the love and trust between you and your ex.
And the best part?
With his practical advice and tips, you could be in contact with your ex much sooner than you think. Are you ready to take the plunge and fight for the love you once shared together?
If so, check out Brad’s excellent free video.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.
The above link will give you $50 off your first session - an exclusive offer for Love Connection readers.