How to know if a guy is playing you or really likes you: 39 things to look for

We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. Read our affiliate disclosure.

It’s not always easy to tell if a guy likes you or is playing you. But, in order to save yourself from feeling crappy and stay away from jerks, knowing the difference is very important.

In this article, we compiled 20 signs that a guy is really into you and 19 warning signs that a guy is playing the game with you.

Are you ready to take a closer look then?

Let’s go!

20 things that a guy is really into you

1) He does nice things for you

Even if this sounds a bit cliché, it doesn’t mean it isn’t true.

When a man is into you, he will find ways to make you feel even more special. He will make sure that you always feel like he’s paying attention to you and genuinely wants to help in whatever way possible.

He will want you to know that he wants to show you all the love and affection in the world.

 2) He is eager to see you

A good indicator of how a guy feels about you is his eagerness to see you, even if he has no plans on seeing you in particular.

If there is a woman he likes, not only will he make a point to call her and make time for her, but he will also start looking forward to seeing her too.

3) He tells you how pretty you are

When a man is into you, he will be the one to notice your beauty. He will tell you that you’re beautiful, no matter the time of day.

When he likes a girl, he doesn’t just have to compliment her, but he also wants to do so in all the right ways.

In fact, there’s a new theory in the relationship world that’s causing quite a stir – it’s called the hero instinct.

Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept finally explains how men really think and feel in relationships.

And it’s something most women have never even heard of.

According to James Bauer, men don’t actually need a lot to feel content in their relationships. What they need actually has nothing to do with sex.

Men have certain innate drivers. And when a woman comes along and triggers them, it causes a powerful response. The result is a man who loves harder, commits wholeheartedly, and truly dedicates himself to the relationship.

So, how can you trigger your man’s hero instinct?

The easiest thing to do is to watch this simple and genuine video by James Bauer.

The truth is, once you understand how the hero instinct works, there’s no telling what heights your relationship can reach.

So if you want to give your man what he truly wants from you, make sure to check out James Bauer’s excellent video. In it, he reveals the exact texts and phrases you can use straight away.

Here’s a link to the free video again.

4) He is a gentleman

A good guy will never do anything that may hurt your feelings. He is always kind and gentle, especially when he wants to impress you.

He doesn’t want you to think twice about spending time with him or giving him an opportunity to be with you.

He will always make sure that he respects your choices, even if it means he has no chance of getting closer to you.

5) He calls you his princess

He may not be saying this to every girl, especially if he doesn’t mean it.

He won’t tell you that you’re beautiful or that he wants to be with you just to make sure that you don’t get the wrong idea about him.

If a guy is into a girl, he will want her to know how special she is and that she can trust him with her heart.

6) He tries to be with you as much as possible

If a guy is interested in a girl, he will make sure that he spends time with her not only when she likes it, but also when she doesn’t.

He will wait outside her house just to surprise her and he will make sure that they hang out more often than they originally planned.

He sees an opportunity to get closer to the girl and wants to take advantage of it.

7) He puts himself out there

When a guy likes a girl, he will put himself out there.

He will make sure that she sees him as the man of her dreams and that he’s willing to do anything to win her heart.

He will make sure that she can feel his love and that she knows he is there for her, no matter what happens.

8) He asks for permission first

If a man likes a girl, he will not take advantage of their feelings or try to make her feel bad about herself. He will never do this, even if they are just friends.

If he’s interested in her, he will always seek permission before trying anything and make sure that she’s ok with it.

I mentioned this fascinating concept earlier: the hero instinct. When a man’s inner hero is triggered, he’s more likely to love you. Just by knowing the right things to say to him, you’ll open a part of him that no woman has ever reached before.

And the best way to do so is by watching this free video by James Bauer. In it, he’ll reveal simple phrases and texts you can use to make your man truly yours.

Here’s a link to the excellent video again.

9) He doesn’t let you go to someone else

When a guy is into you, he will never let you go to someone else.

He will prove himself worthy and give you the best of him. He will do everything else he can to make sure that you only have eyes for him and that nobody else can steal his heart away.

10) He doesn’t make you feel bad

He may not say anything negative at all when he likes a girl, but he will ensure that she knows that she is beautiful and always there for her.

He will always be gentle, understanding, and loving when it comes to showing love towards you. He will never say anything that may hurt you.

11) He looks at you in a different way

When a guy is into you, he will look at you in a different way.

When he sees you, he may stare at you or look right into your eyes and smile. He will always appreciate the time they spend together and will make sure that she knows that she is important to him.

12) He wants to protect you

When a guy likes you, he will not only protect you but will also make sure that no one ever hurts you.

This is how a good man behaves when he likes someone. He will always listen to your needs and feelings and do anything he can to make sure that she’s protected and happy.

13) He does everything with passion

If a guy likes you, he will do everything with passion. He will want to impress you and make you feel special in all the right ways.

He will do whatever it takes to make her feel good about herself. He may not show his emotions much, but he will give all of his attention to every little detail that she needs, even if he isn’t that emotional.

14) He always wants to see your smiling face

When a guy likes a girl, he always wants to see her happy and smiling.

He gets joy out of that and will always want you to feel good about yourself and the things around you. He doesn’t want you to feel bad about anything, even if he can’t always control it.

15) He finds ways to touch you

When a guy likes a girl, he will find ways to touch her in the most loving way possible.

When she turns away from him, he will grab her hand and gently pull it towards him or hold it without letting go. He will do whatever he can to make her feel good and want him even more.

16) He enjoys making you feel good

When a guy likes a girl, he will always make sure that she feels good. If you’re sad, he will try his best to cheer you up or make you laugh.

He wants her to feel like the most important person in the world to him and for everything that she needs, he doesn’t think twice about doing it for her.

17) He sees no need to rush things

A good guy will always make sure that things happen in the perfect way.

He will not think too much about what he wants or what he needs and will just go with the flow. He will control his life and make sure that everything happens exactly how he wants it to.

18) He doesn’t care about your past relationships

If a guy is interested in a girl, he won’t care about her past relationships or what other people have been saying about them.

He knows that the past is the past and that he can make her happy in many ways. He will just focus on making her happy now, while they are together.

19) He keeps his promises

A good guy always keeps his promises, even when she isn’t expecting him to do so.

Even if it means going out of his way to make sure that she is happy and satisfied, he will give it his all just to make her feel special.

He will never break a promise or try to hurt her in any way.

20) He makes her feel like she’s the only one

A good man will treat his girlfriend like she is the only one who matters in this world.

He will keep her far away from any negative influences and make sure that she feels special and loved, even when he knows that he can do so for only her.

He will never try to bring anyone else into their relationship or show them that he cares about anything other than her.

But how can you know for sure you’ve met your soulmate and he/she is the one?

The truth is:

We can waste a lot of time and emotions with people who ultimately we’re not compatible with. Finding your soulmate is no easy task.

But what if there was a way to get absolute confirmation?

I’ve just stumbled upon a way to do this…  a professional psychic artist who can draw a sketch of what your soulmate looks like.

Even though I wasn’t convinced at first, my friend convinced me to try it out a few weeks ago.

Now I know exactly what my soulmate looks like. The crazy thing is that I recognized them straight away.

If you’re ready to find out what your soulmate looks like, get your own sketch drawn here.

19 things that a guy is playing games with you

1) He only compliments you when he wants something

He only compliments you when he has a selfish reason for it.

A good compliment is something that comes naturally out of the heart, but if a guy does compliment his girlfriend only when he has a desire to please you, then you know he’s lying.

2) He can never be open with his feelings towards you

If a guy can’t be honest with you about his feelings, he’s simply not interested in being in a relationship with you.

In case he is confident enough to hide his feelings, he is probably not that invested in you.

3) He tries to make you jealous all the time

This guy is so insecure that he insists on making people around him jealous by flirting with someone else just because that person looks better than him or does what he does not have the courage to do himself.

4) He’s a pleaser and not a leader

Instead of taking responsibility and doing things for himself, he attempts to make others do his work for him so that he will not look bad in front of them.

An insecure man will always want others to take care of him and be respectful towards him. If a guy is afraid to be alone, you can bet that he’s just not ready for a relationship yet.

5) He never takes the initiative in conversation with you

He will wait for you to initiate the conversation with him.

This lets you know that he’s not interested in being in a relationship with you because he won’t take the initiative. He expects you to initiate everything.

6) He is in constant comparison with other guys

He sees himself as better than them and he will always find ways to challenge, compare and point out how great they are in comparison to him.

This makes you feel insecure because he is constantly thinking about how inferior he is to other guys.

7) He doesn’t like making plans with you

He just wants things to work out organically.

The only reason he is not making plans with you is that he doesn’t care enough about the relationship for it to matter.

8) He shows that he likes you by insulting you

He does this because he knows that he can’t be direct with his feelings and will always hide behind insults, remarks, and jokes.

9) He is only willing to date a girl who has the same values

He only sees a relationship as an opportunity for him to make himself look better than others.

If you do not share the same interests as him, he will probably just end things with you because he will feel better about himself.

10) He only wants to touch your hair, without wanting to kiss you

He is probably not ready for a relationship, but he lacks confidence and doesn’t know what to do, so he acts by avoiding making contact with you.

11) He doesn’t know how to listen

He never ignores you, but he is only pretending to understand you.

This makes you feel insecure because he is not really investing time in getting to know what you are saying, or caring enough about the relationship.

12) He uses “I” as much as possible when talking to you

He often talks about how good he is and how much better than you he is.

If he’s an insecure guy, then you know that you are not really that special to him. In fact, this keeps him from being honest with his feelings.

13) He won’t say anything about his life in front of you

He doesn’t share many things about his life because he is afraid to become too exposed and vulnerable.

He keeps his trust and feelings for himself, so he can always walk out of the relationship.

14) He gets defensive about things you say

If a guy gets defensive about everything you say, then you know that he’s not ready for a real relationship with you because he will try to avoid talking about certain topics.

15) He doesn’t like to help you when you ask him for it

He is not willing to put in the effort and work if he does not get anything out of it.

A guy who likes you will always help you out, even if it’s just helping you carry your groceries or watching your dog for a second.

16) He looks at other women in front of you

He only does this to make you feel insecure about yourself and to make sure that you know he could find someone better than you.

17) He tries to avoid spending time with you unless he has something in mind to do

He just doesn’t care that much about the relationship and is unwilling to invest time into it, so he only shows up when he wants something from you.

The rest of the time, he’s probably busy doing other things.

18) He spends more time on his phone than with you

He is only ready for a relationship when he wants something from you, so he will only spend time with you when no one else is around.

Otherwise, he will be sitting by himself in his room, using his phone, and pretending to be busy doing something.

19) He’s always looking at other girls and not at you

This is especially true in public. He does this to keep you insecure about yourself and make sure that you feel inferior. If he really likes you, then he will never look at other girls.

Final words

I hope you now have a better understanding of whether a guy is playing games with you or is really into you.

If you recognize any of these “game playing” signs, then you should think about it for a second and ask yourself: “Is this guy worth my effort?”

Want to lift your dating IQ even more?

I touched on the hero instinct earlier – it’s the perfect remedy for the situation you’re facing.


Because once a man’s hero instinct is triggered, he’ll only have eyes for you. You’ll reach a part of him that no woman has ever managed to reach before.

And in return, he’ll be compelled to commit to you and love you like he’s never loved another woman.

So if you’re ready to take that plunge and reach new heights in your relationship, make sure to check out relationship expert James Bauer’s invaluable advice.

Click here to watch the excellent free video.

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.

The above link will give you $50 off your first session - an exclusive offer for Love Connection readers.