How to get a guy to ask you out at work: 12 useful tips (complete list)

We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. Read our affiliate disclosure.

 

Guys can be hard to read sometimes. They might not always express their interest as clearly as we would like them to.

And that might make it feel impossible to know how to get a guy to ask you out.

I was in that situation just a few months ago, I had a crush on a guy from work, but I didn’t know how to get him to ask me out.

That’s when I started looking into it, and I found some amazing tips that’ll help you out!

1) Hold eye contact

Eye contact is a super simple and easy way to let a guy know you’re interested.

To get good at it, you just have to practice. Hold eye contact for a few seconds longer than you’d normally do.

It’ll show him that you’re interested and it will give you a chance to see if he feels the same way!

It is recommended that you make eye contact at least 60% of the time when talking with someone to make them feel comfortable.

It is also a good idea to hold eye contact for a few seconds longer than usual when speaking with someone you are interested in because it shows confidence and will make them feel more at ease.

Eye contact is a great first step as it sets the mood for the type of interaction you want to have. If you want to come off as confident and comfortable, eye contact will let him know.

You see, men love it when a woman is confident enough to hold eye contact – it mesmerizes them.

The thing is, there are two ways of looking someone in the eyes.

The first one is to look into both eyes. This will make your eyes dart back and forth between their two eyes.

Sure, this is still nice, but if you really want to get someone to be obsessed with you, try the one-eye method.

Choose one of their eyes and focus on it exclusively. You can do this by simply looking at the eye and keeping it there for as long as you want.

The result?

You will have the deep, unwavering, intense look and he will not be able to rip his gaze from you!

And the best part?

He will definitely get the message that you are into him!

2) Don’t be too available

Letting him know that you’re interested is important, but you don’t want to make yourself too available.

Make sure that he has to ask you out and put in a little effort.

If he’s using his own effort to get your attention and ask you out, it’ll make you more attracted to him.

At the same time, you don’t want to ignore him or make him feel like you’re not interested. Be friendly and social but don’t be too eager or make a big deal out of it. Be cool and casual.

This can be a tricky balance to keep, but it’s worth it.

My rule of thumb here is to simply be friendly and talk to him as much as you can without making it too obvious that you’re interested.

Just be your regular self and if he makes any moves, let him know that you’re interested in him too.

If he doesn’t make any moves, don’t worry about it – just continue being yourself and let him do the same.

If he does start talking to you but doesn’t ask for your number, don’t give it to him. Make sure that he asks for it because this will show that he is interested in seeing you again.

The thing is, men love to feel like they are achieving something, like winning you over is a victory.

Now: if you are too easy to get, by for example throwing yourself at him, then he won’t feel like he is winning you over.

He will feel like he’s just getting that which he wants and it won’t be any kind of a victory for him.

Instead, simply switch your mindset. Realize that you are the main prize and start acting like it.

I promise, he will catch on to that very quickly and will realize the same thing. You are a rare commodity and he’ll need to work if he wants to be with you.

3) Send him a friendly message

If you think the two of you could be compatible and want to let him know, writing him a friendly message can help.

Don’t make it too flirty or sexual, just write a simple hello on your slack channel, for example.

You can also ask him to go do something social with you and your friends. A social setting will make it easier for him to approach you and ask you out.

If he’s interested, he’ll know that you’re interested and he might be waiting for you to make the move. This can be a great way to get him to ask you out without coming off as too eager.

You see, sending a message per email or even disguising it as a little question to help you out can really put you on his radar and let him know that you are interested.

You can also mention something about the conversation you had and then ask him if he wants to go grab a coffee with you sometime.

If he’s interested, he’ll be glad to know that you’re interested too and will probably take you up on your offer.

4) Be confident

Even if you’re not completely sure, he should never be able to tell. If you’re not confident, he won’t find you attractive.

If you’re not sure that he’s interested in you, don’t try to make it obvious. If he’s interested, he’ll be the one who initiates the conversation.

If he’s not interested, you don’t want to make it obvious that you’re interested in him. You want him to pursue you, and if you seem too eager, you can scare him off.

Confidence is key when it comes to attraction.

You see, when a woman is confident, it is much easier for a man to be attracted to her. There is something about a woman who knows what she wants that turns men on.

If you’re confident, you don’t have to worry about being too eager or coming off as desperate because he’ll know that you have other options and he’ll want to be the one who stands out.

Now: how can you be more confident?

If you’re not confident in yourself, try to find a way to boost your confidence.

You can do that by doing something that makes you feel good about yourself or by spending time with people who make you feel good about yourself.

You see, if you’re not confident, it’s because something is holding you back from feeling good about yourself. So, find out what that is and work on fixing it.

Don’t let anything hold you back from being the best version of yourself. If he doesn’t like the real you, he’s not worth it anyway!

This thought alone can help you feel a lot more confident right away!

5) Help him feel confident as well

A confident man is an attractive man. And while you want to be confident, you can also help him feel confident.

Being kind and helpful around the office is a great way to do this. As you get to know him, you can use that to your advantage.

Politely offer your help with anything he needs to be done. This will help him feel more confident as well as give you an opportunity to get closer to him.

If you can help him with his work, he’ll be more likely to ask you out because he’ll feel like he owes you one.

If you’re kind and helpful, he’ll be more likely to ask you out because he’ll feel more confident.

But not just that, you can also make him feel more confident by giving him the occasional compliment.

If you notice something that he’s doing well, then tell him. It will make him feel good, and he’ll be more likely to ask you out.

And if he doesn’t ask you out, don’t sweat it. There are plenty of other guys out there who would love to take you on a date!

6) Ask him to meet up with friends

If you’d like to get him to ask you out, asking him to hang out with your friends or colleagues can be a good way to do it.

Let him know that you and your colleagues would love to have him come over and hang out with you.

This will make it easier for him, he can get to know you and your friends, and he’ll have a reason to ask you out after the night is over.

This is a great way for him to approach you, and it will make it easier for him to ask you out.

You can even tell him that you’d love for him to come over, but don’t make it too obvious. If you seem too eager, he might not ask you out.

You see, having colleagues or mutual friends be there can give you the opportunity to get to know each other as well.

As long as you’re there with your friends, you’ll have a chance to talk with him.

And if he doesn’t ask you out, don’t sweat it! There are plenty of other guys out there who would love to take you on a date!

But the thing is, if you’re able to hang out with friends, you might also get a chance to get some alone time.

7) Let him know you like what you see

If you like what you see and you want him to know it, compliment him on something that you like about him.

Find something that he’s proud of or that he likes and compliment him on it. This can help build attraction and make it easier for him to ask you out.

If you like what you see and you want him to know it, compliment him on something that you like.

This can be anything from his shoes to his smile. He’ll know that you’re interested and he might be waiting for you to make the first move.

You see, unless he knows that you like him, he might be too shy to actually ask you out. You’d be surprised how many guys are actually super shy when it comes to asking women out.

He might be waiting for you to make the first move, so compliment him on something that you like.

You see, you need to make it clear that you are romantically interested in him in one way or another so that he can get a chance to ask you out.

If he doesn’t ask you out, don’t worry! There are plenty of other guys out there who would love to take you on a date!

But if he does ask you out, you’ll know that you’ve done something right.

8) Help him feel good about himself

If you want to get him to ask you out, find out what he likes and what he’s good at.

Then, let him know that you appreciate what he does and that you enjoy spending time with him. This will make him feel good about himself and will make it easier for him to ask you out.

If you want him to ask you out, make him feel good about himself.

Find out what he likes and what he’s good at and let him know that you appreciate it. This will make it easier for him to want to ask you out.

You see, guys love to be with women who make them feel good about themselves.

If you let him know that you appreciate the things he likes and is good at, he’ll feel more confident about asking you out.

You need to make it clear that you are romantically interested in him in one way or another so that he can get a chance to ask you out.

9) Joke around with him a lot

If you want to get him to ask you out, joke around with him as much as you can.

Let him know that you’re interested in him and that you want him to ask you out.

If you’re always joking around with him, he’ll know that you like him, and he’ll know that you want him to ask you out. He’ll know that you’re interested because you only joke around with people you like.

You see, when you get along with a guy to the point where you joke around a lot together, you’ll actually have a lot in common.

And that’s something that you don’t have with a lot of other people in your life.

He will appreciate it and will probably want to ask you out.

10) Ask him when he’ll finally ask you out

If you want to get him to ask you out, ask him when he’ll finally ask you out.

Let him know that you’re interested, but you want him to make the first move. Ask him when he’ll finally ask you out, and let him know that you’re waiting for him.

You can do this as a joke, but he’ll definitely get the idea. This will get his mind thinking about you and will make it easier for him to ask you out.

If you’ve been flirting with him for a while and he hasn’t made any moves towards asking you out, ask him when he’ll finally ask you out.

This will get him thinking about it, and he’ll know that you want him to make the first move.

You see, when you do something bold like that, men usually love it.

He’ll realize that he needs to shoot his shot soon so that he doesn’t lose his chance with you.

11) Use body language

Body language is incredibly important when it comes to getting him to ask you out. You need to use body language that will make him want to ask you out.

Show him that you like him without words. You can do this by:

  • smiling more
  • turning your hips toward him
  • mirroring his body language
  • touching him on his arm

These things will help him understand that you really like him!

12) Flirt with him

Flirting is another thing that you need to do if you want to get him to ask you out.

You can flirt with him in person and even over the phone.

If he likes you, he’ll definitely want to ask you out after some flirting!

Sure, you don’t want to overdo it in case he isn’t interested, but a little flirting goes a long way!

You got this

If you want him to ask you out, it’s only a matter of time before he does.

You just need to be patient and persistent, and you’ll get him to ask you out soon enough.

Just keep these tips in mind and you’ll be good to go! It worked for me 🙂

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.