You’ve been ghosted.
It’s been a long day and you want nothing more than to flop into bed and drift off into sweet dreams of the boy who stole your heart.
Unfortunately, he didn’t seem to care much at all about the feelings you had for him — over text message, no less!
But that doesn’t mean he’s gone forever.
And while he may not be living in the same state as you, that doesn’t mean you’ve lost him forever.
In fact, here are 15 surprising ways to get him back
1) Give him some space to figure things out on his own
Ghosting is painful.
And you might think that the best way to get him back is by texting him incessantly or calling him so much he can’t help but respond.
But that might not be the case.
Instead, give him some time to think about things on his own, without constant contact from you.
The last thing you want to do right now is bombarded him with contact and push him further away from you.
Instead of being clingy and making him uncomfortable by calling and texting, give him the space he needs to decide if there’s even a chance at a future with you two.
Most importantly, don’t contact him.
He’ll come around eventually when he realizes that you were a great catch after all!
2) Stop surrounding yourself with him
If you’re like most ghosted girls, you’ll be constantly looking for a remnant of him around you.
You might be asking to see his old phone number or other reminders of the relationship that had come to an end.
Instead, keep yourself busy with friends and family.
Just try to stop thinking about him — focus on getting your life back on track instead of focusing all of your energy on him.
Plus, when he realizes that you don’t need him anymore and you’ve moved on, he’ll have no choice but to come crawling back!
3) Don’t make first contact
Contacting him will only cause more conflict.
He may be thinking that you’re stalking him or that you’re desperate to see a relationship with him succeed.
Instead, keep yourself busy and he’ll start to feel jealous when he sees that you’re moving on without him.
By not contacting him at all you’ll be sending the right message: that you’re okay and you’re focusing on your happiness.
Not only that, but he might feel a pang of guilt knowing that he hurt someone who meant so much to him.
And when he realizes this, he’ll come back begging for forgiveness!
The fact is, if he’s worth it, he’ll get in touch with you and make the first move.
When he does, welcome him back into your arms!
4) Send him a message
If he hasn’t felt the urge to respond by now, chances are he doesn’t want to get involved with you at all.
The last thing he wants is to feel like he’s being forced into a relationship that he doesn’t want — don’t make him feel that way!
Instead, send him a funny meme or leave cute and encouraging comments on his social media with the assumption that if he’s willing to respond to you at all, you’ll both be fine together in the future!
And if he does not respond at all, then you may need to do the next step.
So what can you do in this situation? Send this “No Communication” text
— “You’re right. It’s best that we don’t talk right now, but I would like to be friends eventually.”
This one needs to be sent to the one who ghosted you at the right time for it to be truly effective.
But why I like it is that you’re communicating with them that you don’t need to talk anymore. In essence, you’re saying that you don’t need them to play any role in your life anymore.
Why is this so good?
You induce a “fear of loss” in your ex which will trigger their attraction to you again.
I learned about this text from Brad Browning, who has helped thousands of men and women get their exes back. He goes by the moniker of “the relationship geek”, for good reason.
In this free video, he’ll show you exactly what you can do to make your ex want you again.
No matter what your situation is — or how badly you’ve messed up since the two of you broke up — he’ll give you a number of useful tips that you can apply immediately.
Here’s a link to his free video again. If you really want your ex back, this video will help you do this.
5) Change your social media status
If you’re on Facebook and Instagram, think about changing your relationship status to “single.”
Sure, you may be heartbroken that it didn’t work out with the boy of your dreams but changing your status will let him know that you’re ready to move on.
In addition, he’ll see that there are a ton of other fish in the sea.
It may be hard at first to change your relationship status, but it’s the best way to get him back into your life.
It’s up to you if you want to tell everyone about how he ghosted you or keep it a secret!
But either way, when he finds out from someone else that you’re single again, he’ll be miserable!
When he sees that you’re moving on, he’ll have no choice but to come around and start begging to be with you again!
6) Stop trying to look good for him
It’s a shame that right after the breakup, you’ll be spending your days focusing on how you look for him.
If you’ve ever been ghosted, you’ve likely transformed yourself over time.
After all, why go through all the effort of shopping for new clothes and putting your best foot forward if he’s not even going to notice?
You’ve been trying to look extra cute to attract his attention again, but it’s not working!
Stop trying to be someone you’re not in an attempt to get him back.
This could make him even more distant towards you than he already is.
Instead, continue working on yourself and don’t try too hard or too fast.
But please consider this: when he realizes that you’ve stopped trying to impress him and look good for him, he might be compelled to contact you again!
So stop obsessively trying to look good for him. You’re better than that.
Instead, you should focus on looking good for yourself.
After all, if you are confident in your skin and believe in yourself, he’ll have no choice but to want you again!
7) Take a trip somewhere fun
You probably won’t go on vacation without telling your ex first, and he’ll be annoyed by this.
Instead, take a trip somewhere fun with friends if you’re single — to somewhere new!
Or do something that you want to do — like travel somewhere you’ve always wanted to visit!
Being able to do something that makes you happy is the best way to make yourself feel better right now. And you might wind up messaging him and inviting him along!
If he goes with you on this trip, he’ll have no choice but to start communicating again. He’ll be worried that he’s missing out and that he’s not with you!
If he doesn’t respond to your invitation, don’t fret — you’ll have time to spend with your friends and yourself.
In this time, you can focus on really getting to know yourself and figuring out what makes you happy!
8) Do a fun video or Instagram Story
Remember when I told you to cut off the obsession with trying to impress your ex and look good for him?
Well, go ahead and do that! The better you feel about yourself, the more he’ll be compelled to contact you again.
And once he does, resume communication as best as you can!
You don’t have time to waste waiting around for him to respond when you’re dating someone new!
The only way he’ll get back into your life is if you want him there. He needs that reassurance more than anyone.
So go out and do something fun! Have dinner with friends or play some games that you love — whatever it is, make a video about it and post it on Instagram.
You might just find that he’s watching your videos and your stories online, wondering when you’ll message him again.
9) Stay in touch with him
If you’re the type of person who can keep it together and stay in touch with the ghoster, this is a great idea.
But if you’re like a lot of people and are still heartbroken, don’t bother doing this step.
Instead, let him go for now because trying to get in touch will make things worse for you both. So what do you do now? Simple, stay in touch with him.
It’s best if he’s the one making all the contact between the two of you — and not you.
That way, if he’s interested in getting back together, then he’ll be contacting you all the time!
You don’t have to wait around anymore for his text or call — just message him when you’re ready to talk and see if he responds.
If he doesn’t respond at first, give it some time before trying again!
10) Stop playing the victim
If you want your ex back, stop behaving like a victim.
Even if he ghosted you, it’s not his fault that he ended things!
Instead of thinking about everything he did wrong and how badly he hurt you, start working on yourself instead. Start thinking about all of the things that you have to offer.
You have your whole life ahead of you, so don’t waste it being sad and moping around!
Go out with your friends and live it up!
When he realizes that you aren’t sitting at home crying over him, he may just want to be a part of the fun too.
But whatever the case, the last thing he wants is for you to be miserable. So stop wallowing in self-pity.
You’ll never know you might just pique his interest when he sees you happy and moving on.
And when he does, then you might just have the chance to win him back again.
This relates back to what Brad Browning taught me – there are simple ways to get your ex back.
I mentioned Brad earlier, he’s an expert at helping couples work through their issues and rebuild their relationships.
With practical tips to help you get your ex back, his advice could be just what you need to get your guy back after he’s ghosted you.
11) Move on to the next guy
If you think that he might want you back again, maybe you should try dating someone else.
Going out with another guy will make your ex jealous and want to come back to you even faster!
It’ll be a lot like going out with other guys used to make him jealous.
But you’ll know that you’re not going to be with him unless he wants you back.
And right now, I’m sure that this will be a hard concept to swallow. After all, any guy would jump at the chance to be with you again!
But remember this: it’s your happiness that’s most important. And if he truly doesn’t want the two of you together, then he deserves a girl who can move on without him.
At least now you know that “moving on” means moving on and not looking back!
12) Ask for advice
If you don’t know what to do next because you’re scared to ask for help, then maybe this is the time to find out!
This may seem like it’s a lot of work, but the right advice can get you on the right track again.
If you have no clue what to say when someone asks how you’re doing or how they can help you, then it’s time to take action by asking for advice.
And who better than a professional could possibly understand your situation better?
Now, listen closely. Last year my relationship reached a dead-end.
I’m talking do-not-resuscitate. Over and out.
I was ready to walk away, but before I did that I took a step I’d never taken before. I reached out to a professional relationship coach.
I had low expectations, but even my highest hopes were exceeded. The coach I spoke to at Relationship Hero quickly broke down the walls I’d built up in my relationship and helped me understand why I was ghosted.
This coach was tough but fair. They were genuine and very helpful.
They took apart every single lie I was telling myself and helped me understand how to truly resolve the confusion of being ghosted.
My relationship isn’t perfect now, but it’s so much better than what it was. Most importantly, I’m hugely optimistic about the future again.
13) Learn from your past mistakes
You’ll never know what could have worked if you never tried the steps that you did.
For example, your ex may have ghosted you because he was actually trying to signal that he didn’t want to be with you anymore.
Or, maybe he ghosted because he wasn’t ready for another relationship, so he was simply moving on.
Maybe it’s time for a little second-guessing before going out and doing it all again!
By analyzing your situation, you can learn from previous mistakes and understand why they happened the way they did.
See if you can find out where things went wrong or if you could have tried something different. Sometimes, we don’t know what to change about our situation, but maybe this time it would work!
You’re going to have to do some soul-searching and think back on what happened. That way, you’ll learn from your past mistakes and figure out the best possible way to get your ex back.
Hopefully, these ways will help you find the confidence to move on despite your hurt and sadness over the breakup of your relationship.
14) Don’t forget how happy you were together
You don’t want to forget the good times that you had with him. These memories will fuel your fire for getting him back!
But don’t just concentrate on the bad things that happened during your relationship.
Remember the moments when you two were in love and thinking about a future together. Remember all of the great times that you had as a couple!
It may be hard to do, but remember how much fun you had with him and how excited he would get when things were going well for both of you.
Anyway, try to forget about the bad things and remember all of the good times. That’ll help you realize what your relationship could still be together.
Dating someone else while simultaneously trying to get your ex back can be a huge mistake.
This is why I advise against doing this unless you’re 100% sure that they’re not into you anymore.
15) Move on and work on yourself
If you can, take some time to yourself to focus on your own life and do something that you enjoy.
Whether you’re trying to get over him or not, it’s important to keep up with your appearance.
Make sure that you’re working out, eating healthy, getting your hair and nails done, and looking your best!
After all, it is a reflection of who you are as a woman and how your ex will view you when he sees you again.
It also helps to show him how much better off without him in your life.
If he ever wants to meet up with you again, he may think twice about what kind of girl he wants in his life.
If he comes back into your life, you don’t want to be the same person that you were when he was around all the time.
You want to show him just how much better off you are without him and how much happier you can be with other people in your life — even if it’s just friends who care about you!
It might take a little bit of time, but it’ll make things easier for both of you if he sees what a great person you truly are when he comes back into your life.
Getting over your ex-boyfriend doesn’t have to be that hard.
Take a deep breath and understand why he ghosted on you, so that way if it happens again, you know how to handle it better the next time around.
Indeed, some of us are just not cut out for long-term relationships.
But that doesn’t mean we should never find someone to share our lives with.
If you want to experience love and happiness in a relationship, you need to be prepared for the ups and downs it will bring if ever given a chance.
There’s no way you should ever give up on the idea of seeing him again. Not until there’s a reason to.
So hold onto that hope and keep moving forward. I promise that you’ll eventually find your way back to happiness!
But what if you want your ex back for good?
You’ll need the help of Brad Browning. I mentioned him earlier, he’s developed some incredible techniques to help rebuild the love and trust between you and your ex.
And the best part?
With his practical advice and tips, you could be in contact with your ex much sooner than you think. Are you ready to take the plunge and fight for the love you once shared?
If so, check out Brad’s excellent free video.
Good luck and thank you for reading my article! I hope it has been helpful.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.