10 steps to attract a married man emotionally

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I bet you’ve been wondering how to attract a married man. You want to date him and make him happy, but you know he’s with someone else or committed — this is never going to happen, right? Wrong!

In this post, we’ll take a look at 10 steps that are both ethical and effective in order for you to get under his skin and have him thinking about you when he should be focusing on his wife.

And just a word of advice: make sure that you’re completely clear on what you want to happen in your relationship. Otherwise, you may end up hurting yourself or him.

1) Find out what he needs most

Married men have serious relationship issues. They have a strong emotional attachment to their partners, and this attachment is probably the reason why they are still committed to their marriage.

So you need to know what he needs most in his relationship in order for you to get him emotionally attached to you. 

Men need constant emotional support from women, and that’s why this is one of the key steps in attracting a married man. If you can play this role, he’ll be yours.

Another tip: 

Find out if he is hiding something that he’s not telling his wife. If this is the case, you may have a chance to win him over.

2) Resist the subject of marriage and commitment

Trust me, if you bring up the subject of getting married or looking for commitment, you’ll scare him away.

Let me explain:

When you bring up the subject of commitment, his mind immediately goes back to his wife and how much he loves her.

And if you do this too often, he’ll pull away. You need to make him want to get emotionally attached first and then look at a future together.

3) Give hints of intimacy without crossing boundaries

Think about this for a moment:

If you’re dealing with a committed man, he’s not just going to cheat on his wife — you need to be realistic.

So how do you get him emotionally attached and ready for intimacy?

You have to give him subtle hints of feelings of intimacy without stepping over any boundaries that he may have set for himself.

For example, you could send him a text message to say you’re thinking of him or that you miss him. Don’t be pushy, and make sure you’re not asking anything or pressuring him in any way.

4) Trigger his hero instinct

The next step is to make him feel like a hero, and this is something that’s going to really get his juices flowing.

Let me show you how:

There’s a new theory in the relationship world that’s causing quite a stir – it’s called the hero instinct

Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept finally explains how men really think and feel in relationships. 

And it’s something most women have never even heard of. 

According to James Bauer, men don’t actually need a lot to feel content in their relationships. In fact, what they need has nothing to do with sex. 

Men have certain innate drivers. And when a woman comes along and triggers them, it causes a powerful response. The result is a man who loves harder, commits wholeheartedly, and truly dedicates himself to the relationship. 

So, how can you trigger your man’s hero instinct? 

The easiest thing to do is to watch this simple and genuine video by James Bauer. 

The truth is, once you understand how the hero instinct works, there’s no telling what heights your relationship can reach. 

So if you want to give your man what he truly wants from you, make sure to check out James Bauer’s excellent video. In it, he reveals the exact texts and phrases you can use straight away.

Here’s a link to the free video again.

5) Find out where and when he is the most vulnerable

Not only women are vulnerable in a relationship — men can be vulnerable as well.

And chances are, your man is thinking about his wife when he’s going through a tough time. So here’s how you can find out where and when he’s most vulnerable:

– Find out what’s going on in his life. What’s happening with him?

– Ask him about his childhood. Childhood is a memory that never leaves a man and it can bring up his vulnerabilities easily.

– Ask him to tell you a story of when he was important to someone or felt secure in someone’s arms.

– Ask him to tell you a story of when he was vulnerable to being hurt by someone.

– Find out what his trust issues are and get him to talk about them.

When you have all the information, grab this chance to show your support and tell him how you feel. Tell him how much you care about him and that you won’t hurt or leave him.

6) Find something that connects you to him on a deeper level than just physical attraction  

As I’ve mentioned above, men want constant emotional support from women.

In order to get his attention, you need to find something that connects you to him on a deeper level than just physical attraction.

The secret?

Make sure that you’re doing something that he won’t be able to do with his wife.

Maybe you have a passion for photography, or maybe you just have a hobby that you enjoy sharing with him.

Whatever it is, make sure your passions are compatible or his hobbies are the same. This is how you’ll connect on a deeper level than just physical attraction.

7) Create an atmosphere of healthy sexual desire within your relationship

Before you can get your man emotionally attached and ready to commit, you need to be ready for the sexual aspects of a relationship and create an atmosphere of healthy sexual desire within your relationship.

Here’s how:

You need to make him feel like he can talk about anything and everything with you. If he’s worried about his wife or kids, ask him how things are going for them. You don’t want him focused on his responsibilities but instead, want him focused on you.

You could also let him know that every time he tells you about his relationship, you’ll be interested in hearing about his life as a whole.

You might even want to ask him to tell you about the good things that have happened and share some of the memories with you. This will give him a sense of security knowing he can talk to someone without worrying about his wife or kids hearing what he’s saying.

8) Make sure you’re on the same page spiritually and intellectually

The truth is:

Once you’ve established a connection with your man on a deeper level, you’re ready for the next step — a relationship with him.

So make sure you’re on the same page spiritually and intellectually before you go there.

Men need to feel like they’re compatible in both areas as well, otherwise, they won’t put effort into your relationship because they’re not connected on a deep level.

9) Flatter his masculine ego

Another way to attract a married man emotionally is to create a sense of connection with him on a “masculine” level.

It’s easy to do because we all tend to fall in love with the man that we feel has something special about him, and one of those things is his masculinity.

You need to make sure that you start flirting with him right away right at the beginning. You can do this by telling him how attractive you find him and how sexy he looks when he’s around you.

Try to point out his masculine features and actions that you like. And start doing things that he loves.

10) Show him what he’s missing in his marriage

The last step is to show him what he’s missing in his marriage.

Be absolutely sure to set your boundaries, but don’t stop there. Tell him what you think he’s missing in his relationship.

No matter what he tells you, focus on what his wife is missing out on — not what she has — and that it’s him that is responsible for providing those things.

The more you tell him this, the more you hit him with the thought that there is something wrong with his marriage.

But remember to show him the reality of your situation.

Once you’ve fired the first few shots, he’ll start to wonder if there’s something wrong with his marriage. And it will no longer be a secret that he’s been neglecting his wife. 

So, when you do this, just make sure you’re focused on how to fix your situation instead of dwelling on what’s wrong with someone else’s.

Final thoughts

We’ve covered 10 steps that are designed to attract a married man emotionally and help him develop an attachment to you.

But the very most important tip I want to give you is: Trigger his hero instinct.

I touched on the hero instinct earlier – it’s the perfect remedy for the situation you’re facing. 


Because once a man’s hero instinct is triggered, he’ll only have eyes for you. You’ll reach a part of him that no woman has ever managed to reach before. 

And in return, he’ll be compelled to commit to you and love you like he’s never loved another woman

So if you’re ready to take that plunge and reach new heights in your relationship, make sure to check out relationship expert James Bauer’s invaluable advice.

Click here to watch the excellent free video.


Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.