We all want it and we are all trying to find it.
This four letter word has such a huge impact on everyone’s lives. Some people even do crazy things just to get a piece of it.
When it comes to love, we tend to throw caution to the wind.
Love is THAT powerful.
However, in this modern dating scene, people seem to confuse love with attraction and infatuation.
They meet someone, get to know them, and suddenly, something just clicks.
Butterflies fill their tummies. They start thinking about that person almost every day. And they find themselves smiling whenever that person is near.
Soon enough, they can’t decide whether they’re in love or their brain’s just playing games with them.
If you’re having the same trouble and you find yourself perpetually wondering if you really are in love, don’t worry, you are not alone.
Billions of people out there know the word love but not its true meaning.
So how would you know if you do love someone?
18 Signs You’re In Love
Here are some telltale signs to help you discover your real feelings.
1. You’ve taken your time.
You can’t put a time stamp on love.
But Elsa from the movie Frozen once said, “You can’t marry a man you just met.”
Chances are, she’s right.
True love takes time.
You can’t trust all those chemicals in your brain to know if you love someone.
There are a lot of people out there who will tell you they love you and take it back the next day. Don’t make the same mistake.
It’s like buying stuff you want only to regret buying them. And end up returning them later.
Sadly, love is not quite as simple.
So you’ve given yourself some time. You’ve taken things slowly and you got to know them better. And you still like them. In fact, you like them even more.
2. You seek to give
True love is when you focus more on giving rather than taking.
Some people imagine themselves marrying a person and envisioning their future with them.
But to know if it’s really love, you need to see things not only from your perspective but from your partner’s as well.
Love is when you consider someone else’s needs before yours.
So if you find yourself having a long list of things you want from a relationship, rather than things you can give – try taking a step back and think things through.
3. You acknowledge their imperfection.
While it is a good thing to focus on people’s strengths instead of their weaknesses, acknowledging their bad traits is important too; especially, if you’re in a relationship.
It’s normal to see the best things about your partner.
But it’s real when you see how imperfect someone is but you love them anyway.
You acknowledge their weaknesses, their flaws, and their shortcomings; yet you still want to stay. In fact, you choose to stay.
See your partner for what they truly are and not for what you want them to be.
4. You choose hearts before faces.
As saddening as it might be, some people focus more on the physical aspects of a person instead of their personality.
If you claim to love someone just because they’re easy on the eyes, that’s probably attraction, not love.
Loving someone requires you to know that person on a personal and deeper level.
Physical things fade away but a good attitude and a kind heart stay.
If you only see the superficial things, your relationship’s foundation would be as shallow as a plate.
Look at your partner’s character instead of their looks.
5. You don’t let emotions get the best of you.
Loving someone feels amazing.
It gives you emotions you’ve never felt before.
But at times, your emotions might get the best of you. You start losing your sense of rationality when it comes to making decisions.
Don’t let this happen to you. Always use your head along with your heart.
Don’t let your emotions get the best of you. It’s not easy, but try to make rational decisions.
(To learn techniques to deal with your emotions, check our best-selling eBook on the Art of Mindfulness here).
6. You are realistic.
There’s an abundance of movies and books that portray love in very unrealistic ways. They give false and unrealistic ideas of love.
Love should be realistic and not idealistic.
There is no such thing as a perfect relationship. Even the healthiest relationships face problems and misunderstandings.
If your idea of a relationship is far from the boundaries of reality, think again. Maybe it’s just love or just infatuation.
7. You’re freeing.
A little bit of jealousy and possessiveness isn’t bad for a relationship.
Too much of it, however, can be toxic and even dangerous.
Love should be freeing and not possessive.
Your relationship with your partner should be built out of complete trust in one another.
If one of you is too possessive and you don’t fully trust each other, you might want to reassess your relationship and think if what you have is really love.
8. Distance only makes your relationship stronger.
As counterintuitive as it might sound, separation should strengthen your love for each other.
Distance lets you see if you really want that person in your life or you just ‘love’ the idea of them whenever they’re around.
If you and your partner live miles away from each other and your relationship still blooms, that’s a great sign that what you have might be love.
(To learn how to make a long-distance relationship work, check out our guide here)
9. You’re committed.
Love shouldn’t on feeling. Commitment should back it up.
There are days where your relationship will lose its spark and you might feel as if you’ve grown apart from each other.
If you feel this way, know that it’s totally normal and every relationship goes through bumpy roads.
Relationships aren’t always rainbows and butterflies.
But if you really love someone, you make decisions based on a commitment with that person and not out of feelings.
10. You can’t keep your eyes to yourself.
When you love someone, you find yourself wanting to look at them all the time. Whether you are flipping through pictures on Instagram or staring at them over cocktails at a bar, you can’t get enough of their face.
You love to listen to them talk and the way they move. You could just watch them all night.
And not in a creepy way of course, but in a way that makes you feel good.
11. You feel like you are flying.
Being in love has often been described as being “high” or feeling like you are “on cloud 9!” We couldn’t agree more.
If you are lucky enough to find love in your life, you will know right away because you will feel like you are gliding through life.
You won’t be looking for any reason to come down off that feeling and you’ll want it to last forever.
12. You can’t stop thinking about them.
When you are apart, near or far, you want to be with them again and again. You can’t stop thinking about everything to do with them.
You wonder what they are thinking and what they are doing and if they are thinking about you too.
It’s a hard place to be sometimes because you can become overwhelmed with all of these thoughts, and if you do, it’s definitely love.
13. You want nothing but happiness for them.
When you love someone, you want them to be happy no matter what.
Sometimes, in the case of unrequited love, you might have to settle for being happy for them with someone else.
But it’s a good indicator of whether or not you are in love: you want them to be happy even if it’s not with you.
14. You feel stressed about the pressure of a relationship.
With all these mushy feelings flying around in your head and heart, it can send you on a bit of a tailspin.
Being in love is wonderful, but it’s also confusing and filled with pressure. You might find yourself becoming overwhelmed by these feelings and wondering how to manage them.
You might feel stressed out about what the future holds and how you will cope. All signs pointing to love.
15. You feel like pain is worth it to be with them.
Every relationship has its ups and downs and if you are in love for real, you are going to be ready to weather the storm with your true love.
Whatever may come your way, you are ready to stand tall together. If you are in love, you will welcome the pain that may find you because you know that your love will endure and keep you strong throughout.
16. You are suddenly open to trying new things.
If you’ve been bitten by the love bug, you’ll find yourself being more adventurous and willing to take more risks.
You might decide to take a trip you never dreamed about before or you want to go on an adventure that would have been out of the question.
Love makes us do crazy things, but it also makes us do wonderfully exciting things too!
17. You aren’t turned off by their habits.
When you are in love you can see past all the gross stuff that comes along with being human.
Sounds, smells, sights, and more all seem to wash over you as you spend time just being thankful to have found this person.
18. You are willing to wait for them.
If you are in a long-distance relationship, you’ll know you are in love if you are willing to try to make things work.
Whether there is promise that you’ll be together soon or not, you are willing to wait for them to give this thing a really try.
That’s how you know you are really in love: if they don’t even need to be near you for you to love them.
In short, infatuation is based on a feeling whereas love is based on a commitment.
Love is one of the things that makes being human worth it. There’s so much distress and chaos in the world, but when we look around and see people loving one another, comforting one another, and sharing intimate moments, we know it’s all worth the trouble here on earth.
Being in love is one of the most beautiful things that can happen to a person. If you think that you identify with the above signs, then be thankful. You’re in love and it’s time to embrace its magic!
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.