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We all know the situation: The first date went really well, he followed up with a text about how much he enjoyed it and then …. nothing!
If you find yourself in the same situation, and he has stopped texting you, here are 10 tips for you:
He texted after the first date but not since – 10 tips if this is you
1) Try not to focus on the negative
Don’t let your mind dwell on the fact that he hasn’t texted you in a while.
Remember how wonderful the first date was and all the great things that came from it?
Try to focus on all of the good things that happened since then (like getting to know each other better).
Remember that it is pretty normal for guys to take some time to think about what they want to say and how they want to say it.
Take a deep breath and remind yourself that he probably just hasn’t gotten around to texting you yet.
If you want to text him again, wait at least 24 hours before you do so.
Remember that he may have been busy with work or something else and is just waiting for the right time to text you again.
Ask yourself if there is anything that could have happened since the first date that might have prevented him from texting you.
Either way, focus on the positive.
Take it easy and don’t get too stressed out.
You’ll feel better if you take some time to relax before texting him again.
2) Make a list of all the things you enjoyed about the date and write them down
If you are afraid and overthinking that the date might have been worse than you remember, write down all the things you enjoyed.
This will help you to focus on what made the date fun for you.
Writing down these memories will also help you to remember why he was so important to you.
You can also use this list as a reference when trying to schedule another date with him.
By having this information at your fingertips, you’ll be more likely to find out what happened after the first date.
You see, sometimes writing things down can bring you more clarity.
Maybe there was something you have overlooked at first.
Perhaps, there was something that you didn’t notice or there was something that you didn’t understand at first.
And the most important part?
If you don’t write things down, your mind will only remember the negative and that can be really stressful.
3) Take care of yourself by going for a walk or doing something calming
If you’re feeling overwhelmed or stressed, going for a walk or doing something calming may help you relax.
Taking care of yourself is the most important thing here.
Remember that you are a human being and it is perfectly normal to feel stressed out when something as big as this happens.
With time, you will be able to overcome your stress and anxiety.
You can also take a few minutes to think about the date and try to come up with some possible solutions.
This will help you to see the positive side of things. Plus, it will help you see your own worth.
It’s also important to remember that if he stopped texting you because of something you did, he may still be interested in you.
Give him a chance to explain why he stopped messaging you and see if there are any commonalities between the two dates.
If there aren’t, maybe it’s time to take a break from dating and focus on other relationships.
4) Text him back if you want to, but don’t get too wrapped up in your phone when he doesn’t reply
If you don’t hear from him after a while, don’t get too wrapped up in your phone.
He may have just had a busy day or he may be too busy for a second date.
Just text him back and let him know that you still care about him.
Try to not be stuck to your phone, though.
Live your life and don’t make a guy who isn’t texting you back immediately the focal point of it all.
If you find yourself getting stressed out, take a break and do something calming, or don’t text him at all.
Being anxious about your date is only going to make things worse.
Try to relax and have fun!
On that note, let’s look at the next point:
5) Try to distract yourself
If he’s really into you and wants to keep in touch, he should have been more proactive in communicating his feelings.
If he hasn’t texted you in a few days because he was too busy with work, it might be time to give him another chance.
However, the ball is in his court.
In the meantime, try to distract yourself!
You see, if you’re feeling anxious and stressed, try to do something that will take your mind off of it.
This could be as simple as going on a walk or doing something else that will help you relax.
If you have no clue what to do, just go outside!
It doesn’t matter where you go, just get up and move around!
Another great option would be spending more time with your friends and family for distraction.
On that note:
6) Ask friends for advice
One of the best things to do when wondering why he’s not texting you is to go to your friends for advice.
They can offer you another perspective on the situation and can help you interpret his actions.
You can also ask them if they know any other guys who may have done something similar to them.
If they do, they’ll be able to give you some advice on how to approach the issue and what to say.
This can make all the difference!
7) Set yourself a time frame for when you will text him
If you have a hard time waiting for him to get back to you, setting yourself a time frame of when to text him can really help.
Say to yourself something like: “I won’t text him for one week.”
If he texts you in the meantime, you can obviously reply, but when the week is over you can also be the one reaching out to him.
Having this set deadline can prevent you from sending one of those notorious 3am texts.
8) Focus on yourself in the meantime
If he stopped texting you because he was busy with other things, don’t get discouraged.
He may have just been crammed at work and didn’t have time to check in with you.
If he hasn’t checked in for a while, it’s time to shift the focus back on yourself.
Focus on your hobbies and things you enjoy, to take your mind off of him.
Don’t stay out of touch for too long, but if he’s really into you, he’ll want to keep in touch with you anyways.
Take care of your mental, physical, and spiritual health and focus on growth and becoming the best version of yourself.
This way, when he sees how independent you are without him, he will want to be with you and support you.
9) Understand your own worth
If you feel like you’re not worth his time, it’s important to understand your worth.
What sets you apart from other people?
Understanding your inherent worth will make dealing with this situation so much easier, believe me.
This will also help you deal with any other situations that may arise in the future.
Put yourself first and understand your worth, and you’ll be able to think clearly and make the right decisions.
10) Know that this is not personal
You see, it’s hard to know for sure why he is not texting you back.
Maybe he just doesn’t feel that close to you or maybe he’s just busy.
If this isn’t something you’re comfortable with, reach out and ask him why he stopped texting.
One thing that is for sure is that whatever it was, it’s nothing personal.
Even if he doesn’t like you as much as you’d wish he did, it doesn’t say anything about you as a person.
In that case, he did you a favor by letting you have the opportunity to meet someone who sees and appreciates you for who you are.
Don’t wait too long
Whatever you do, don’t wait too long for him to decide to text you back.
If you really like this guy and you think your first date was successful, then maybe you should make a bold move.
My suggestion? Trigger his inner-hero and make him yours for good!
James Bauer, a relationship expert, discovered a way to do just that.
He calls it the Hero Instinct and if you trigger it in this guy, he’ll not only begin to text you a lot, but he’ll also fall in love with you.
How does this work?
A man has certain innate drives. When a woman comes along and triggers them, he’ll want to commit to her completely and make her the happiest woman on Earth.
Watch James Bauer’s free video here.
In it, he explains how this powerful concept works, shares simple texts and phrases that you can use right away and reveals more about how to get the relationship of your dreams.
So, if you want to make him yours, even if he hasn’t texted since after your first date, you can!
