Are you currently struggling with this situation? Maybe a guy told you he didn’t love you anymore, but suddenly he is back and wants to get back together.
What do you do in this situation? It’s not always easy to decide, but here are 10 tips if this happened to you:
1) Get clear on what it is you want
First off, you will need to get really clear on what you want, do you even want him back?
You will need to be very honest with yourself here and if you are not able to decide what the outcome is, then how can you even make a decision on whether or not you want him back, right?
You see, I know that he was the one who left in the first place, but maybe you noticed while he was gone, that you felt happier without him! Maybe you didn’t love him anymore, or maybe you never did. The point is, it is good to know the truth about what you really want.
Unless you know exactly what it is you want, you can’t really approach him properly and tell him what you want.
That makes sense, right?
So, the first step is to figure out what you want from this, do you want to get back together or do you think staying apart would make more sense?
I know, this will be a difficult question to answer, but you got this. You are strong, you can do this.
If you aren’t sure of what you want, it will be really hard to know how to approach him and tell him what you want.
I know that it is hard because a guy left and came back, but he did it for a reason.
Maybe he realized something about himself or maybe he realized something about you and he didn’t like it?
2) Find out why he changed his mind
To make a proper decision, you will need to know all the facts. For that, it’s good to know why he came back.
You don’t want to go into this blindly, but you have to be very careful. If you are not able to ask him why he came back, then how can you make a decision on what to do?
This is not an easy question, but it is important because it will determine if you want him back or not.
It’s okay that it’s hard to ask him, because he left and came back, that’s never an easy decision to deal with.
You don’t need to know the details of his life while he was away, just the main reason for his return.
If you can’t find out why he came back then how can you decide whether or not you want him?
Unless you are aware of the reason why he left, there is no way you can decide whether or not he is trustworthy.
I know that it is hard, but sometimes we don’t see all the facts at first glance. We have to dig deeper in order for us to get them all and know exactly what happened…
3) Talk to a relationship coach
While this article will shed light on the main things you can do when he comes back, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.
With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice tailored to your unique situation…
Relationship Hero is a popular site where highly trained relationship coaches help people work through complex relationship issues, like telling their partner they don’t love them anymore.
Their popularity boils down to how skilled their coaches are.
Why am I so confident that they can help you?
Well, after recently experiencing a tough patch in my own relationship, I reached out to them for help.
From the moment I got in touch, I was given genuine, helpful advice, and was finally able to see my relationship issues with real clarity.
I was blown away by how kind and empathetic my coach was.
Within minutes, you could be receiving life-changing advice on how to navigate and repair the issues you’re facing in your relationship.
4) Talk to your friends
Okay, this one is important.
Being in your situation, it is very likely that your opinion is a bit skewed, given that you are the subject of the matter.
Because of that, it is important that you talk to your friends.
You need to have an open mind as well as your friends, and try not to let the situation get you down.
Your friends have an excellent third-person perspective on the whole situation.
They know what you are feeling and thinking, but they have also been in your shoes.
They can help you with your decision if you ask them.
If you ask them, they will give you their honest opinion about the situation.
And this is where I need to say that many people do not like to talk about their personal problems for a variety of reasons.
I understand that it is hard to talk about such things, especially since it involves someone else, but I think it would be beneficial to do so in order to make the best decision possible for yourself and your relationship.
5) Decide if he’s worth putting in the effort for
This might sound a bit cruel, but do you think he is worth putting in the effort for?
If so, then you should keep going with the relationship.
But if he’s not worth it, then you need to decide whether or not you want to continue with the relationship.
It’s important that you know how he truly feels about the relationship so that you can make an informed decision on what to do.
If he doesn’t want to work on it, then there is no point in continuing with it.
You need to make sure that what you are doing is right for YOU and not just for your ego.
You need to be honest about your feelings and ask him if he feels the same way.
6) Don’t decide right away
This is crucial. In order to make a good decision, you need to give yourself a few days to think about it.
You need to give yourself time to process the information so that you will understand what is really going on with the relationship and what you want out of it.
If you make a decision right away, then there is a high chance that you will regret it later on.
You need to think about the situation and know if he is worth putting in the effort for.
You see, when you decide in the spur of the moment, there is a good chance that you are either overlooking the facts or simply making a decision based on what you think you want.
Both of these things are wrong and will lead to a bad decision.
You need to think about the situation and make sure that you are making the right decision for YOU.
You can tell him that you need more time to think things through. This is actually a great test.
If he is serious about you, he won’t mind waiting and giving you that time.
7) Take care of yourself
Having someone tell you that they don’t love you anymore is rough.
It’s even rougher when they go ahead and suddenly show up again.
Now – if you find yourself in this situation, you need to really take good care of yourself.
This is a difficult situation and you need to be careful.
You need to take care of yourself emotionally and mentally.
You may be thinking that you don’t want to do this, but you need to do it anyway.
If you don’t, then you will end up hurting yourself when he comes back later on.
This means making sure you are healthy, taking care of your mental health, going outside, taking a walk, reading a book – anything to keep your mind off of things.
If you don’t do this, then it will be really hard for you to deal with this situation.
You need to give yourself time to heal and process things.
The only way that you can do this is by giving yourself time and not rushing into things.
8) Take some space from him
When the guy who told you he doesn’t love you anymore comes back into your life, you will be flooded with emotions.
Not only will there be hope, but you will also most probably be confused and a little infatuated again.
In order to keep a clear head and make the right decision, it might be smart to take some space from him.
You see, if you are in his vicinity, you will be affected by your emotions.
You will be hoping that he will change his mind, and you may be hoping that he will stay.
If you are around him for a while, it could lead to the wrong decision.
If you don’t want to make the wrong decision, then take some time away from him.
Take a trip to a nearby city or book a vacation somewhere that is far away from him.
This will give you time to think things through and make sure that you are making the right decision.
9) Be patient and understanding
When it comes to love, we all make mistakes in our lives. Nobody is perfect.
Now, if you decide to take him back despite everything, it is important that you are patient and understanding.
You will not jump right back into the relationship you had before, it will most probably take some time to get back to that place.
You will need to give him some time to work things out, and he will need to be patient with you.
You will not be able to go back and forth between the two of you, so it is best if you are understanding of this.
You will also have to be patient with yourself as well because there is a chance that you might still be hurt.
When he comes back into your life, don’t try and force things or make him feel bad.
Give him some time and the chance to work things out without pressure on either side.
You will have to be patient and understanding of both sides.
10) Focus on yourself
When you are hurt and confused, it is very easy to get caught up in emotions and feelings.
It is very easy to get caught up in a situation when you are not prepared for it.
In order to make the best decision, you need to focus on yourself first.
You need to focus on your own needs before focusing on the needs of another person or people.
It is important that you make decisions that are best for both parties involved in this situation.
You do not want your life thrown into turmoil because of one person’s decision.
You do not want to be a victim of someone else’s mistake or poor choices.
Be strong and stand up for yourself, because no one has the right to treat you however they please just because they can take advantage of a situation.
This is your life, so make sure that you are making decisions that are best for you.
11) Be honest with yourself as well as him
It’s also important, to be honest with yourself as well as him about any expectations regarding the relationship. You need to find out the truth about what you want and then go from there.
You need to figure out what you really want from this relationship.
I know that it is hard, to be honest with yourself, but you have to do it if you want things to be right.
If you don’t know what you want, how can you tell him? If he doesn’t know what he wants, how can he make a decision on whether or not he wants to be with you?
You need to remember that no one is perfect and there are always things that need to be worked on in order for a relationship to work out.
No one is perfect and we all have flaws, but these flaws have nothing on us if we can work through them together.
You need to be open about these flaws and discuss them without judgment.
If you can’t be honest with him about how you are feeling, then how good is a relationship with him, anyway?
You need to be honest with him about these things, so he can see how you are really feeling.
It’s okay that you don’t want to talk about these things, but if you want the relationship to work then it’s important that you communicate with him.
If you do not communicate with him and work through your issues then there is no way he will know if he wants to be with you or not.
You got this
No matter what you decide to do, remember to do it from your heart. Really listen to what is best for you and then go ahead and do it.
Whatever decision you end up making will be the right one for you!
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.