Your partner needs time to think about the relationship and you are desperate and at a loss for what to do?
Don’t worry, many women find themselves in that exact situation, and with the help of this article, you will know exactly how to proceed!
1) Stay calm and don’t panic
When your partner has decided to take some time to think about the relationship, the first thing you need to do is to stay calm.
If you panic, your partner will notice your anxiety and feel pressured even more.
You need to show him that you’re confident in the relationship and that you’re certain that the two of you will find a solution together.
If your partner has decided to take time to think about the relationship, it means that he cares about you and the relationship.
He doesn’t want to hurt you, and he needs to find a way to make the right decision. You need to respect that.
Think about it: if he wanted to break up, he would have just gone ahead and done that, right?
Now, before you do something rash that might sabotage your relationship, in the long run, stay calm and be rational.
This is not a super devastating thing, and how you react right now will have a big influence on what he ends up deciding.
Think about it: if he wants some time to think about the relationship and you bombard him with 20 different messages because you feel scared, that might push him away.
2) Take a step back and observe the relationship
When your partner needs time to think about the relationship, you need to take a step back and observe the relationship as a whole.
First of all, why did he take this decision? What is it that he needs to figure out?
Is there anything that you’ve been doing wrong in the relationship? Or, without taking all the blame, is there some part of the relationship that just isn’t ideal?
Next, think about how the relationship has been going so far. Are you happy in the relationship?
Have there been any problems, or have you felt that something has been off for a while?
If you have been feeling stressed and anxious about the relationship, it can be very helpful to take some time to think about it and evaluate it as a whole.
You see, it’s important that you don’t take all the blame right now, but that you really figure out where you might have gone a bit wrong.
It always takes two to create a problem in the relationship, so looking for ways to improve without taking all the blame is always a good thing!
You can figure out what you could both be doing to improve the relationship, and then, when your partner is ready to talk, you could tell him about these things you’ve thought of.
3) Trigger his inner hero
Many women have found that the best way to respond to a man who needs time to think about the relationship is to trigger his inner hero.
There’s a new theory in the relationship world that’s causing quite a stir – it’s called the hero instinct.
Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept finally explains how men really think and feel in relationships.
And it’s something most women have never even heard of.
According to James Bauer, men don’t actually need a lot to feel content in their relationships. In fact, what they need has nothing to do with sex.
Men have certain innate drivers. And when a woman comes along and triggers them, it causes a powerful response.
The result is a man who loves harder, commits wholeheartedly, and truly dedicates himself to the relationship.
So, how can you trigger your man’s hero instinct?
The easiest thing to do is to watch this simple and genuine video by James Bauer.
The truth is, once you understand how the hero instinct works, there’s no telling what heights your relationship can reach.
So if you want to give your man what he truly wants from you, make sure to check out James Bauer’s excellent video. In it, he reveals the exact texts and phrases you can use straight away.
4) Show your partner you’re confident in the relationship
If your partner has decided that he needs time to think about the relationship, it’s possible that he feels insecure in the relationship and needs some time to work on that.
You need to show him that you’re confident in the relationship and that you’re certain that you want to be with him.
Think about what you can do to show him that you’re confident in the relationship.
For example, you can start a project together. This will help you to spend more time together and will show him that you’re ready for the next step in your relationship.
However, he might also just not be confident in the fact that you two are compatible.
In that case, make sure that when you talk, you tell him that you are very confident in your relationship.
But stay honest with yourself, here.
If you notice that perhaps your partner is right and your relationship is crumbling, then you need to be honest with yourself and your partner.
Don’t try to convince yourself that you two are compatible when you know deep down that you two aren’t.
5) Communicate openly with your partner
You need to communicate openly with your partner if you want to resolve the situation successfully.
If your partner has decided to take time to think about the relationship, it means that one or both of you have something to work on.
Communicate openly with your partner and find out what it is that you need to work on.
If you’ve been feeling like something has been off for a while and your partner has decided to take time to think about things, you definitely need to resolve the issues in your relationship.
If you want to save the relationship, you need to find a way to resolve the issues that have been causing problems in your relationship.
It’s not easy, but if you want to save your relationship, there’s no other way.
You need to tell him that you want him to be honest with you and that you want him to tell you what’s bothering him so that the two of you can find a solution together.
It’s important that your partner knows that you’re willing to listen and help, so it’s a good idea for him to know this right at the beginning.
If your partner thinks that he will hurt or offend you by telling the truth, then he will not feel comfortable enough around you and will not open up. This is exactly what we don’t want!
So tell him to be completely open and honest so that you can both be on the same page.
6) Think about how to respond to his wish
When your partner has decided to take some time to think about the relationship, try to think about how you should respond to his wish.
You need to come up with a smart and thoughtful response that will show him that you care and that you understand what he needs right now.
You can say something like, “I understand that you need some time. I want you to take all the time you need. I’m here for you no matter what you decide.”
Try to avoid saying things like “When will you know??” or “Are we still doing XYZ?”.
Those kinds of statements will only remind your partner that he needs to make a decision and will put more pressure on him.
Instead, take some time and think about what you want and need in this situation, and how you can voice that.
For example, you could agree to take a week or two and then revisit the subject.
7) Don’t pressure him to decide now
If your partner has decided to take time to think about the relationship, don’t pressure him to decide now.
As I’ve already mentioned, your partner needs time to think about the relationship and to figure out how he feels.
You can’t rush him. If you try to pressure him to decide now, it will only make the situation worse.
He will feel even more pressured, and he will end up saying “no” to the relationship entirely.
If you want your relationship to survive, you need to give your partner the time he needs.
You need to understand that he needs time to think about the relationship and that he isn’t trying to break up with you.
Quite the contrary!
If your partner has decided to take time out of the relationship, then it means just one thing: he needs time!
If you try pressuring him into making an immediate decision, then it shows him how much pressure and stress this situation is causing for both of you.
This won’t help at all!
The best thing for both of you is an environment where there are no pressures at all and where both of you can relax and think about things calmly and rationally without any worries or pressure from anyone else.
I mentioned this fascinating concept earlier: the hero instinct. When a man’s inner hero is triggered, he’s more likely to commit to you.
Just by knowing the right things to say to him, you’ll open a part of him that no woman has ever reached before.
And the best way to do so is by watching this free video by James Bauer. In it, he’ll reveal simple phrases and texts you can use to make your man truly yours.
8) Don’t be afraid to walk away if needed
If you’ve tried all the things from the list and you still can’t get your partner to decide whether he wants to stay in the relationship, you may have no other choice but to walk away from the relationship.
If your guy needs time to think about the relationship and you feel that he will never come back to you, it may be time to walk away from the relationship.
Of course, it’s not an easy decision. But if you really want a happy relationship, you need to follow your heart and do what’s best for you.
If you feel that your partner will never come back to you and that you want to break up with him, don’t be afraid to walk away from the relationship.
It’s better to end things now than to wait for your guy to break up with you later.
Now: this is only on the rare occasion that either he can’t decide or he isn’t sure about you for a long time.
In that case, I urge you to walk away.
You see, the right guy for you will not need forever to decide whether he wants to be with you.
He either does or he doesn’t.
If he doesn’t, then you need to move on and find someone who does.
Let’s be honest here, if he is not willing to be with you, then there’s no way that he will ever commit and marry you.
He may never come back to you or wake up to his true self and realize that he wants to be with you.
If that’s the case, then I urge you to walk away from the relationship now before it gets any worse.
Don’t waste your time on a guy who doesn’t want to commit and marry you!
You want a man who will commit and marry you, so if your man can’t do that for some reason, then walk away from the relationship now before it gets any worse!
9) Let him chase you
Instead of now being the one chasing your man, let him be the one pursuing you.
He needs to show you how much he wants to be with you and that he’s willing to do anything for you.
That will give him a chance to prove himself and show you that he’s serious.
You don’t have to make all the moves now.
It’s time for him to make the first move now and show you how much he wants to be with you!
You see, maybe he needs some time to think about the relationship, but when he decides to be with you, he will have to be the one initiating it and chasing you.
He will have to be the one showing you that he wants to be with you and that he’s willing to do anything for you.
If he isn’t doing this, then I urge you to move on.
Because if he doesn’t show you how much he wants to be with you and that he’s willing to do anything for you, then there’s no way that your relationship will ever last!
Trust me with this, if you are a feminine woman, you don’t want to end up chasing him, that is the opposite of your core energy and what you want.
10) Work on yourself in the meantime
If your partner has decided to take some time to think about the relationship, don’t just sit around and wait for him to come back.
You need to do something to make you feel better and to show yourself that you’re a strong and confident person.
You can read books, go to yoga classes, go to meditation retreats, take online courses or do anything that will help you to feel better and more confident.
What’s important is that you don’t just sit around and wait for your partner to come back.
Don’t do all these things for him, either. This is for you!
You see, when you work on yourself mentally, spiritually, and physically, your confidence and sense of self-worth will increase.
And when your confidence and sense of self-worth increase, you will feel better about yourself, which will make you more confident.
This is a great way to show yourself that you are a strong and independent person who doesn’t need anyone else to make you feel good or complete.
From that space, you will be able to make really good decisions for yourself and the relationship, because you won’t feel so codependent.
And if your partner comes back, he will see that you are a strong and independent person who doesn’t need him to make you feel complete.
That will make him want to be with you even more because he will know that you can support yourself and won’t need his money or his help.
If your partner has decided to take some time off from the relationship, it’s important that you take good care of yourself physically, mentally, and spiritually.
This is the best thing that you can do for yourself right now!
When we don’t feel good about ourselves physically or mentally, we tend to get really needy and desperate to be with our partners or to have them come back into our lives.
But when we take good care of ourselves emotionally, physically, and spiritually, then we won’t feel as needy or desperate for our partners.
11) Take the time to really think about the relationship and what it means for your life
Maybe he just needs some time to think about the relationship, but if he hasn’t come back after a few weeks and still hasn’t shown any interest in getting back together with you, then it’s time for you to start thinking about the relationship and what it means for your life.
You need to ask yourself some hard questions, like:
Who am I without this relationship?
What do I want to do if I don’t take him into consideration at all?
Am I still happy in this relationship?
These are important questions because you need to know how you will feel if he doesn’t come back.
If he does eventually come back, then the two of you can go back to the way things were before, and things will just be like they used to be.
But if he doesn’t come back, then you need to know that it’s time for you to move on with your life.
But not just that, you might even realize that for you, the relationship is also not the best environment anymore and that you are really starting to let go of the attachment to being together.
12) Be clear about your needs
Okay, we talked about not pressuring him into a decision, but you also need to take care of yourself and your own needs.
In a relationship, it’s important to be clear about your needs.
This is especially true when your partner needs space and time to think about the relationship.
It’s important that during this time he knows exactly what you need from him and vice versa!
If he doesn’t know what your needs are, then he might make decisions without taking them into account.
You see, there is nothing wrong with needing time to think about the relationship, but if you say something, like “I need to have a date when we will check in with each other again and talk. You don’t need a decision until then, but I need to know when we will check in with each other”
This will take off the pressure of having to decide, while you have the security of knowing when you will check in with him.
13) Don’t spend all your time worrying about him
I know this is a hard one, as it can be hard getting your mind off of someone when you love them and are in a problematic spot right now.
However, try to not spend all of your time worrying about him.
You see, when you spend all of your energy worrying about him it will be a lot harder to be patient and to wait for him to figure things out, and you also just won’t be able to enjoy your life in the meantime.
Instead, try to distract yourself a bit.
It’s important to do things that make you happy so that you can enjoy your life again!
And this will also make it easier for you to be patient and wait for him because you will have a lot more energy and will be a lot happier.
And the best part?
You will realize that you don’t desperately need this man to be happy, so your attachment to his decision will decrease a bit, as well.
14) Be prepared for any outcome
This is another important step.
You see, when someone is in the middle of a decision like this, they might not know what the outcome will be yet.
When they are making their decision about whether or not to come back, they might need some time to think about it.
So, just be prepared for any outcome!
Sure, he might realize that you are the love of his life and he never wants to second-guess himself ever again, but he might also decide to end things.
The hardest part is that you literally can’t influence the decision, and quite frankly, you shouldn’t have to.
You see, if a man doesn’t want to be with you, don’t force him.
This is not healthy for either of you.
You are a valuable woman and if he doesn’t see that, he isn’t the right guy for you.
Instead, just be prepared for whatever the outcome will be and go from there.
15) Remember that the choice is always yours
I know that especially in these situations it can feel as though you’re powerless and have no influence over the outcome.
But you can’t control everything, and you shouldn’t try to.
Instead, just remember that it’s always your choice.
You don’t need to make a decision about anything right now, or in the future.
Just remember that you have free will and can choose what to do with it at any time!
While you can’t choose what your partner will say or do, you get to choose how you react to it.
And if your partner isn’t treating you with the respect you want and deserve, it is also your choice to go ahead and end things.
Remembering that the choice is always yours is crucial in order to feel better about this entire situation.
16) Remember that you are not alone
I know that it can be very hard to feel alone in this situation, especially if you’ve been together for a long time.
But remember that you are not alone.
Now is a good time to talk to friends or family and get their support.
This will help you to remember that you are okay and that things will work out in the end.
Remembering you are loved is also a great way to rebuild your self-confidence.
You will figure it out
If anything, one thing is for sure: you will figure it all out.
No matter what happens, you’ll get through this situation.
And if you want him back?
I touched on the hero instinct earlier – it’s the perfect remedy for the situation you’re facing.
Because once a man’s hero instinct is triggered, he’ll only have eyes for you. You’ll reach a part of him that no woman has ever managed to reach before.
And in return, he’ll be compelled to commit to you and love you like he’s never loved another woman.
So if you’re ready to take that plunge and reach new heights in your relationship, make sure to check out relationship expert James Bauer’s invaluable advice.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.