It’s often a taboo topic that people don’t want to bring up.
No-one wants to be caught up in an affair, whether you’re the one being cheated on, or the mistress on the side.
But, at the end of the day, it’s true when they say you can’t always help who you fall in love with.
If you’re wondering whether or not your relationship stands a chance, then here’s everything you need to know.
Here’s 5 key signs he will leave his wife for you and tips on how to build a happy relationship afterwards.
5 signs he will leave his wife for you
Soulmates don’t always meet under typical circumstances. It may be the case that by the time you find the one you’re meant to be with, he’s already settled into a marriage with another woman.
He may never have felt the type of love you too share before.
You might feel the same way.
No matter the reason the two of you have come together, the question on your lips is, will he leave his wife for me?
Here’s 5 clear signs that he has every intention of doing just that.
1) He spends more time with you
If he’s spending more time with you than he does with his own wife, it’s a good sign of where his loyalties lie.
If he wanted to keep the affair a secret from his wife (to stay together), then he would put more effort into being around her as much as possible, while sneaking what little time he has alone to be with you.
The time and effort someone puts into you are great signs of exactly how they feel. If he’s seeking you out for company – and not just sex – it shows that he deeply cares about you and doesn’t want to leave you.
He’s already consciously choosing you over her by the amount of time he’s spending with you.
Take it as a great sign for the future of your relationship.
2) He talks about it
Another sign that he’s getting ready to leave is when he talks about doing just that.
Of course, you want more than just words and empty promises. He’s likely to tell you exactly what you want to hear just to keep you there.
A man who is actually thinking about leaving his wife will bring up the topic himself, without being prompted. It’s a clear sign it’s at the forefront of his mind, and he wants to use you as a sounding board to help play it all out.
You will also start seeing some action. Whether he’s already started moving some of his belongings out, or simply on the house hunt to make his escape.
When a married man is actually going to leave his wife, it will be a hot topic on his lips. And these words will be back through actions.
3) You trigger his hero instinct
If there’s one way to work out where you stand in the midst of a marital affair, it’s by triggering his hero instinct.
If your man is straying, it’s because his wife has failed to trigger this instinct in him.
He’s looking for it elsewhere.
That’s where you can step in and solidify those feelings between the two of you.
So, it’s time to get to work.
Men have a biological drive to feel needed and essential. He wants to protect you and provide for you, he just needs to be given the opportunity to do so.
First thing’s first, it’s not about play damsel in distress. It’s not about needing a ‘hero’ in your life. But it is about making him feel needed all the same.
The best thing you can do is watch James Bauer’s excellent free video here about the hero instinct and the potential it has to change your relationship for the better.
If his hero instinct hasn’t been triggered, then you can count on the fact he will stay with his wife and you will continue to simply be the woman on the side.
Once you do trigger it, he will only have eyes for you. His wife won’t even be in the picture any longer.
In his new video, James Bauer outlines several things you can. He reveals phrases, texts and little requests that you can use right now to make him feel more essential to you.
Sounds too good to be true, right?
If you ask me, this is the best kept relationship secret, and one you’ll wish you had come across years ago.
4) He no longer hides you
When it comes to dating a married man, you’ll learn early on that everything is a secret.
If he’s looking to make things work with his wife, then you’ll continue to be a secret. He won’t want to get caught, as that will likely end everything.
So, if you suddenly find that he’s taking you out in public and proudly showing you off to friends, it’s a clear sign he has every intention of being with you.
He doesn’t care what others thing about the relationship and he isn’t worried about it getting back to his wife. As far as he is concerned, that’s already over.
He’s proud to be with you and happy to show you off to the world.
5) He talks about your future
If your man starts talking about a future where the two of you are together for life, you can guarantee he’s planning on leaving his wife for you. He’s simply waiting for the right time to make his move.
If he wasn’t serious, then he would avoid talking about the future altogether. He would see you as someone filling the time right now, with no intention of ever settling down with you.
But once he has fallen for you deeply, he will start working you into his future plans. That’s when you’ll know that his intentions are serious.
He wants to be with you, and only you.
He might start planning where the two of you are going to live, the children you have together and what holidays you will take.
It’s clear that he wants you in his life no matter what.
He’s giving you all the signs that he’s willing to leave his wife for you.
5 tips for moving on with a married man
It’s no secret that cheating with a married man is very murky territory.
It doesn’t get much easier if he choses to leave his wife for you.
Suddenly, there’s so much more you need to navigate to get your new relationship to get off to the best start possible.
Here’s how to be happy together:
1) Give it time
Leaving his wife for you doesn’t mean he is going to break off the marriage and land directly in your arms.
While he will need support during this time, he will also need breathing space at the same time.
Let him sort out his feelings and process the loss he is going through. It doesn’t matter whether the relationship was long over before now or not, he has still lost his marriage. At one point in time, he thought this was the best thing for him.
It’s important to let him mourn that.
The last thing you want is to be the rebound, waiting with open arms, ready to brush off the ex and move on.
Sit on the sides waiting, encourage him to process his feelings and get whatever closure he needs on the situation.
Once he has healed, you can think about moving on with your relationship.
2) Consider the feelings of others
There are going to be plenty of people in both his friendship and family group, along with your own, who are going to be on the wife’s side.
People naturally tend to side with the person who has been wronged.
It doesn’t matter how you look at the situation, it’s clear that the wife has been wronged. Whether or not the feelings were already gone. Whether or not she didn’t treat him right. Whether or not she had it coming.
No matter how you look at it, there’s never really a good excuse for cheating. This is why you might even find some of your family and friends frowning upon this new relationship.
The best thing you can do is respect their feelings.
Don’t rub it in their face and don’t try to defend what you did. Both these actions will push them away further.
Instead, understand that everyone needs their own time.
If you can avoid pushing your relationship onto them and asking them to let you know when they’re ready, they will eventually come around to the idea and see how much in love the two of you are.
Forcing this on them will only drive an even bigger wedge between you.
3) Get the issue of trust out in the open
It’s the one question you’re going to hear over and over, “Aren’t you worried he will cheat on you”. Naturally, people assume the fact he has done it once, means he’s more likely to stray again.
It’s probably true.
It’s definitely something the two of you need to discuss – after all, you do know he’s capable of deceit.
While you can never have a guarantee that he won’t cheat on you (let’s face it, no-one can), it helps to get these feelings out in the open.
Discuss ways you can build trust with each other and make sure you’re always on the same page throughout the relationship.
Bring open and honest about your feelings for each other is the best way to lead a transparent relationship.
It certainly makes it easier to ignore those doubters who like to speak up!
4) Kids make it messy
If there are kids involved, then it’s going to be a messy affair.
That’s not to say you shouldn’t follow your heart. It just means you need to think with your head as well, so you care completely prepared for what you’re walking into.
The moment he walks out the door and leaves his wife for you, he is completely altering the relationship he has with his kids.
You can guarantee they aren’t going to warm to you instantly, after all, you’re the sole reason their mum and dad are no longer together. Whether or not you’re to blame isn’t the issue here.
This can in turn create plenty of friction between the two of you.
From sorting out visitation rights, to taking on the role of step-mum, to navigating holidays and birthdays, there’s one thing for sure. When there are kids involved, you are never truly free of the wife. Ever.
It’s important to have thought this through before you take the plunge. It also helps to keep it an open topic of conversation, to help each other navigate the new roles you’ve both been thrown into as a result.
5) Take it slow
Now that he has finally left his wife, you feel like you can be together. Utterly and completely, once and for all.
The best thing you can do is actually take things nice and slowly.
While you might have been seeing each other on the side for a long time already, this is completely different to living with each other and being in a full-time relationship.
Expect some hiccups along the way.
What you once thought was a perfect relationship you simply couldn’t get your hands on solely, is now a full-time partner that you have to get to know all over again.
Your relationship is going to change significantly, so don’t rush it.
Take your time and get to know each other all over again.
Trigger his hero instinct
If you’re looking for the best way to ride off into the sunset with your married man, then simply trigger his hero instinct.
This is a concept I mentioned earlier in the article, but it’s worth touching on again.
It simply is that important.
Whether he’s still with his wife, or has recently left and you’re navigating this new relationship, this hero instinct is the key to your happily ever after.
So, what exactly is it? The term was coin by relationships expert James Bauer and it’s a game-changer when it comes to finding the right man for you and settling down once and for all.
It’s based on the idea that all men have a biological urge to be both needed and wanted. No, he doesn’t want to fly into a room with his cape on to fight the baddies. He simply wants to play a front seat role in your life in protecting you.
Once you trigger this instinct in a guy, you won’t have to question whether or not he’s going to leave his wife for you. You also won’t be left wondering if he’s going to cheat on you in the future.
He will be playing the one role he wants and the rest won’t matter.
He will want to be your everyday hero and be around you no matter what.
So, are you ready to get started?
Click here for an excellent free video by James Bauer about the hero instinct. He reveals exactly what it is and give a great overview of his game-changing concept. You can use his expert tips to trigger the hero instinct in your man.
Living happily ever after
It’s true that getting into a relationship with a married man is hard work. It’s not an easy situation to be in, no matter which way it goes.
Whether it works out or not, you’re setting yourself up for a lot of challenges and potential heartache along the way.
But that doesn’t mean it can’t work out for you.
It’s often best to trust your gut instincts and ignore the advice from those around you. If they aren’t in the relationship themselves, then they can’t possibly understand where you’re coming from.
The truth is, happily ever after does exist, you just have to fight for it.
Who knows, you could just be the couple to ride off into the sunset and never look back.
You can be happy with a married man.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
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