Are you currently dating a Thai man and looking for a few tips on how to go about this adventure?
Cross-culture relationships can be challenging but look no further, I will tell you 15 tips you need to know about dating a Thai man!
1) Communicate your expectations about women
The first thing you need to know about dating a Thai man is that their expectations of women might be different than what you are used to.
While seeing things like confidence and independence as attractive at first, as time goes by, these attributes can become appalling to a man from Thailand.
Working for yourself might be intimidating to a Thai partner, and he might want you helping him with his business, instead.
You might be expected to keep the apartment clean, keep yourself “attractive”, and not go out or travel by yourself.
These expectations are not shared by every Thai man, of course.
In my opinion, your best bet is to have an open and honest conversation about your individual expectations, so that there are no surprises further down the line.
2) Beware of jealousy
To a certain extent, jealousy is part of a healthy relationship.
There is nothing wrong with feeling slightly protective over your partner, and noticing your partner’s (slight) jealousy can even be flattering.
Thai men can take this a bit overboard, however.
Simply put, a problem arises when sheer jealousy and protectiveness turn into full-blown ownership.
When a partner, regardless of the cultural background, becomes overly jealous, the significant other tends to feel suffocated.
Some ways this might show are:
• Being driven to work (and basically anywhere else)
• Having your phone checked
• A mistrust of all male friends of yours
• A mistrust of your female friends
• Always needing to say where you are and what you’re doing
Doesn’t sound too great, right?
The good news?
Not every Thai man is like this! If you notice a few of these tendencies, have a heart-to-heart with your boo.
3) Your man might have strong faith
Thai men often value their religion over anything and everything else.
Patriotism is also high up on their list of priorities.
It comes to no surprise, there are many coming-of-age rituals Thai men go through when growing up into adults, which engrain this devotion into them.
Don’t worry, this is obviously not an issue as long as you are okay with it!
A great tip is to encourage your partner to show you a few of the religious traditions.
That way, he will notice that you are genuinely interested in his culture and background.
4) Money could become an issue
Sometimes, at the beginning of the relationship, a Thai man might be incredibly charming, inviting you to dinner and paying for the bills.
As the relationship progresses, however, it is not uncommon for the woman to be the one covering a majority of the payload.
This is especially true when there is a sizable income gap and you earn a lot more than your partner.
In these cases, it’s always a good idea to stay on the same page regarding money expectations!
Talk it out and agree on who will be paying what moving forward.
5) They can be really shy
Thai men tend to be very shy. It can be hard to discern between a man being nice and wanting to be friends, and someone flirting with you.
Their approach is often slow, and depending on the person, they might not even shoot their shot at all.
To help them out a little, make it as clear to him as you can that you like him without throwing yourself at him.
A few things to keep in mind:
• Smile at him a lot
• Don’t flirt with anyone else
• Don’t sleep with him on the first date (if you want to keep him long-term)
6) Be mysterious when dating
A great way to make it clear to a Thai man that you want to be treated as an equal is to pay half the bill on the first date.
Thai men tend to be incredibly romantic. You will be the queen of his world!
In this time, be a little mysterious. Thai men will be intrigued.
What does this mean for you?
A Thai man might turn you down the first few times you ask him to sleep with you.
Trust me when I say this is not due to a lack of desire on his part.
In Thailand, it is deemed as a sign of showing respect for you when he turns you down a few times.
Eventually, he will come around… 😉
7) Thai men can be hot and cold
If you’re currently dating a Thai man, you might have noticed it already, but some men from this part of the world tend to be hot-and-cold.
You might notice that as:
• Not calling
• Ignoring you for days on end
• Suddenly showing up all in love
And that’s just one side of the story…
Other times, they might go overboard and call you 7 times a day to check up on you.
There is nothing really to worry about this behavior, but you will have to decide for yourself if you want to put up with it or not!
8) Don’t take being called fat as an insult
Let me explain.
Thai men might call you fat, but in their culture, it’s not seen as offensive like it is in the West.
Think about it: most Thai women weigh around 40 kilograms, in comparison to which most Western women are heavier.
Try to not take it personally, but let him know that he shouldn’t say that about you.
9) Show respect to his family
Family is very important to Thai men.
When you get a chance to meet his family, try your best to follow “Thai” etiquette as much as possible (without infringing too much on your own personality, of course.
A few things to do:
• Be extra nice to his mom
• Don’t swear
• Dress conservatively
That brings me to my next point:
10) Don’t wear clothes that are very revealing
Sure, you shouldn’t change your entire style and personality for a guy, so if you genuinely love wearing revealing clothes (I know I do and wouldn’t wanna change that!), talk to him.
Not every man is the same, and your partner might actually have nothing against your choice of clothing at all.
However, due to the innate jealousy of a lot of Thai men, revealing clothes can be a big turn-off.
Have a conversation about it and remember to stay true to yourself above all else.
11) Learn a little Thai
Nothing is cuter than when a girl tries to learn a language for her boyfriend.
Not only will it be adorable, but you will also be able to connect with his friends and family a lot more.
Trust me, he will appreciate it. A foreign woman knowing some Thai? That’s a huge turn-on.
12) Incorporate Thainess
A big key to success in a relationship with a Thai man is when you incorporate as much “Thainess” into your life as possible.
Of course, you should stay true to your personality, but a few traits that are valued are:
• A bit of independence
13) Leave him his freedom
Letting your man go out with his friends will help a lot with keeping the relationship harmonious.
This also means not always dragging him with you when you go hang with your peeps.
You will show him you trust him and you will both have your own lives without being codependent on each other.
Speaking of trust, there is something you should know:
14) Beware of Giks
Thais are no strangers to infidelity. So much so, that they even have an official name for the affair partner: Gik
In Thai culture, it’s acceptable for a man to be with multiple women while still in a relationship.
But don’t worry, if you can’t imagine being in a relationship like that, simply talk to your partner!
Let him in on your concerns and find a compromise together. Oftentimes, when he knows how much of a dealbreaker it is for you, he will not be interested in anyone else.
15) Don’t be scared off by an early “I love you”
Before you are left speechless and mortified, let me tell you that Thai men tend to say “I love you” MUCH earlier than it is common in the West.
Don’t let that scare you off unless you really can’t imagine a relationship with that man at all.
Let him know that you are flattered, but that you need a little more time to reciprocate these words!
Cross-culture relationships can be difficult
Although relationships across cultures can be complicated and difficult, they also offer an incredible amount of insight and enrichment.
Don’t let the obstacles scare you away from dating a Thai man!
Sure, there are things you might not be used to, but after all, love can conquer anything!
With issues like these, communication is really key. Talk about your differences and find solutions to overcome them in a way that works for both of you.
This relationship could be the greatest thing that has ever happened to you!
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