There’s a huge difference between enduring a man’s behavior and respecting yourself.
This isn’t about being picky, ladies, it’s about knowing your worth.
A woman with self-respect doesn’t stand for certain things from a man, plain and simple. She’s aware of her value and refuses to accept less than she deserves.
Now, I’m Tina Fey, founder of the Love Connection blog, and as a relationship expert, I’ve seen my share of bad behavior. So here are the 8 behaviors a self-respecting woman should never tolerate from a man.
Remember, it’s not being demanding, it’s about being respected.
1) Disrespectful comments
We all have a line in the sand when it comes to respect, especially when it comes from a significant other.
And for a woman with self-respect, that line is clear and unmovable.
One major red flag is disrespectful comments. This can be explicit insults or subtle put-downs, both in private and in public. If a man belittles you, mocks you, or makes you feel less than you are, that’s unacceptable.
Remember ladies, it’s not about being overly sensitive or demanding. It’s about knowing your worth and not letting anyone devalue it.
So, if a man can’t respect you with his words, he’s not worth your time. Period.
Always stand up for yourself and don’t tolerate disrespectful comments. After all, love is about lifting each other up, not tearing each other down.
2) Lack of support
In my many years as a relationship expert, I’ve noticed a common thread in successful partnerships – mutual support.
A woman with self-respect won’t tolerate a man who doesn’t support her dreams and ambitions. A relationship is a partnership, and that means standing by each other through thick and thin.
If your man is always dismissing your goals, or worse, belittling them, that’s a glaring red flag. We should be each other’s biggest cheerleaders in a relationship.
As the great Oprah Winfrey once said, “Surround yourself only with people who are going to lift you higher.” And that most certainly includes the man in your life.
Don’t settle for a man who doesn’t believe in you and your dreams. You deserve someone who will stand by your side and cheer you on every step of the way.
3) Overbearing control
One thing I’ve learned both from personal experiences and from counseling countless women is the importance of maintaining your own identity in a relationship.
A woman with self-respect won’t tolerate a man who tries to control her every move. That’s not love, it’s control, and it can lead to an unhealthy dynamic known as codependency.
In my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I’ve written extensively about the dangers of losing yourself in a relationship.
If you’re constantly walking on eggshells, worried about upsetting your man, or feeling like you need to change who you are for him, it’s time to reevaluate.
A good relationship empowers you, it doesn’t confine you. Always choose empowerment over control.
4) Too much agreeability
Now, here’s a point that might surprise you. A woman with self-respect won’t tolerate a man who always agrees with her.
Sounds counterintuitive, right? But hear me out.
Agreeing with everything you say isn’t a sign of compatibility or a harmonious relationship. In fact, it’s often a sign of a lack of individuality or even fear of conflict.
Healthy relationships thrive on individuality and the ability to have friendly disagreements and debates. It’s in these moments that you learn from one another and grow together as a couple.
Don’t settle for a man who simply nods along with everything you say. Seek out a partner who has his own thoughts, opinions, and isn’t afraid to share them. Remember, the spice of life is in its diversity!
5) Lack of emotional availability
This one is close to my heart, ladies. A woman with self-respect won’t tolerate a man who’s emotionally unavailable.
Emotional availability is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. It’s about being open, vulnerable, and willing to share your innermost thoughts and feelings.
I’ve been in relationships where my partner was an emotional fortress, and let me tell you, it’s exhausting. You feel like you’re constantly trying to scale a wall, only to be met with stone-cold silence.
If your man is always closed off, unwilling to share his feelings or be there for you emotionally, it’s time to reconsider. You deserve someone who’s not afraid to be vulnerable with you and can provide emotional support when you need it.
6) Disregard for boundaries
Let’s get real here, ladies. A woman with self-respect won’t tolerate a man who disregards her boundaries.
Boundaries are not just physical; they’re emotional, mental, and even digital. They are the lines we draw to protect our well-being, and they should be respected.
If a man is constantly pushing your boundaries, ignoring your ‘no’, or making you feel uncomfortable in any way, that’s a neon sign flashing ‘disrespect’.
No one should make you compromise your comfort or safety for their benefit. So stand firm on your boundaries and don’t let anyone, no matter who they are, cross them. Your well-being matters above all else.
7) Unwillingness to apologize
Ladies, here’s a personal lesson I’ve learned: a woman with self-respect won’t tolerate a man who never apologizes.
Apologies are not a sign of weakness; they are a sign of emotional maturity and respect. If a man can’t swallow his pride and say ‘I’m sorry’ when he’s wrong, that’s a problem.
A relationship without apologies is like a car without brakes – it’s bound to crash eventually.
As the wise Maya Angelou once said, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” An apology can go a long way in healing hurt feelings and mending trust.
8) Inconsistency
Let’s cut straight to the chase, ladies. A woman with self-respect won’t tolerate inconsistency from a man.
Inconsistency in words and actions breeds confusion and insecurity. One moment he’s all over you, the next he’s distant. Today, he can’t stop talking about the future; tomorrow, he can’t even plan a date.
This kind of inconsistency isn’t just frustrating; it’s emotionally draining. It keeps you guessing, doubting, and second-guessing yourself.
You deserve a man who’s consistent in his feelings for you and whose words match his actions. Anything less is just not worth your time or emotional energy. Remember, love isn’t supposed to be a roller coaster ride of uncertainty.
Conclusion
To wrap things up, ladies, remember that self-respect is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. Don’t settle for a man who doesn’t respect you, your dreams, your boundaries, or your feelings.
If you find yourself in a relationship where these behaviors are present, it might be time for a serious discussion, or even a reevaluation of the relationship itself.
For more on maintaining your self-respect and avoiding codependency in relationships, check out my book Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship. Remember, you are worthy of love and respect. Don’t settle for anything less.